[MommyApril]

Well, I know many of you have been wondering how court went on Tuesday in regards to Madison. As you know, at the last permanency planning hearing it was decided that they would be asking the judge to terminate the parental rights for the BF and **. At that point, three weeks ago or so, neither the BF or the ** had made any effort to get her back, and it looked like a sure thing. We got to court Tuesday and waited all day for the judge to hear her case. We got there at 11am, and finally the judge heard it at 4:45pm, just before closing time, after hearing all the juvenile delinquent cases, and a few of the same kind of cases as ours. The judge was really hard on the parents, and we knew it would be fair for us. All the other cases took about an hour, ours took 15 minutes need I say more? The judge quickly glanced over the social workers report to the court, and asked the dad a few questions, and that was it. She agreed with the social worker (who is really, and I mean, REALLY partial to the birth father), and changed the plan to reunification with the BF, and allows now for overnight visits, up to three nights. Our hearts sank, shock set in, and we were numb. Still are. None of the facts were presented. The domestic violence from the BF, the fact he allowed her to live in a home with a sexual predator. The fact that in January they were living in a hotel, and on several occasions at three different hotels has been found wandering around the hotel and lobby by herself, "dirty and without shoes." At the hotel was found cocaine, and pipes used to snort cocaine. That the BF has three prior convictions for posession of a schedule VI controlled substance, and on probation for breaking and entering. He has also been in jail recently for failure to pay child support. Is this where she belongs? In court he said he could support her with help from his ex-wives, one who turned to Social Services for financial help herself to take care of Madison. And what about the fact he can't pay child support for his other kids?
The ** was not in court, as she is currently in prison for drugs, and the judge granted termination of parental rights from her. The judge said the case would be reviewed again in 45 days, and if everything was okay from the social workers report, Madison will go home with him. Our hearts are completely broken. We truly love Madison with all we have, and can give her love she will not get with her BF. When we first got her, she would try to eat food that had been dropped on the floor, because she did not get alot of food at her BF's house. She was timid, reserved, scared, and has come out into this beautiful little girl that brings joy everywhere she goes. We will do all we can to keep this from happening, but in the back of our minds are scared of what may happen. We are truly broken. Today my wife said it was like greiving a death, and I can say I agree. We ask that you pray for us in the situation. My wife has taken so much emotionally already with dealing with not being able to have a child on her own. Our strength is sapped, and as the visits start, and we deal with Madison's behavioral problems after the visits, we will be tested to our limits. As of now the visits were an hour, and we spent a whole day getting her back to normal. She is angry, whiney, and confused. The poor child has been through enough, and so have we.
We will be doing all we can for the next 43 days, including writing a letter to the judge, but we ask you pray that God will guide everyone involved. That He would comfort Madison, and give us peace that He is in control, which is what we are having a hard time believing right now. Well, I guess that is all for now, but thanks in advance.

[MommyApril]

I don't know why birth mother became **, but there is the translation...

[momofmykids]

The initials birthmom when placed together are a "bodily function". That's why you get the **

I'm praying for you guys and little Madison. I can't imagine a child going back to that.

God bless.

[stepforone]

Didn't your fd have a lawyer (GAL) or any type of CASA worker present in court that could speak for her? Can't you find anyone that could petition the court like a councellor or Dr. that is aware of the situation. I'm so sorry the court turned out that day. What a shock for you and your wife.

[punchkin]

I to am sorry that you are going through this. Your wife is so right. It is like grieving a death. But take comfort in knowing that no matter what happens that you have loved and taught her how to loveas well. She will take this with her for the rest of her life. I will be praying that everything turns out as it should. Good luck.

[Luvbeingmommy]

You, your wife and especially Madison are in my prayers.
You said that the Social Worker was REALLY partial to the birthfather... This should be reported to her supervisor. If she cannot remain objective, she should not be on this particular case. I also agree that someone (Guardian ad litem or CASA worker) should have been there to speak up for Madison. If she doesn't have one of these -- you need to request that they be appointed. And again you may need to go to the Social Worker's supervisor to get anything done since she is showing favoritism toward the birthfather.
Keep us updated!

[bumpkin]

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I can't imagine how hard this will be.

[MommyApril]

We did have a GAL, and she told us she was not going to recommend reunification, but I think the judge did not really pay attention to her report. She has really been a big help to us in encouraging us, and she believes in our cause, she is just new to this, too, and can't help alot. I am going to call their attorney this week, and we are preparing a letter to send to the judge asking her to review the case again, and we will be sending pictures, and other things for her to see. My wife did call the SW's supervisor, and she said she would not assign us a new SW, that she didn't "just move cases around like that." We felt like that was one of our only good chances. After all, we did not know that the judge viewed the report the SW wrote as importantly as she did. I mean, literally, she just said, uh, okay, I will do what the SW has said. So, with us not getting a new SW, were have our hands tied behind our backs on this, but not God's. This weekend we get together our battle plan, and Monday we start the fight. Not for us, but for Madison.

[ALI143]

I'll keep saying prayers for Madison and for you.