[smlanders]

We are new at this and have only one FD now. We are thinking of taking another to accompany the FD we have. Im a bit skeptical to take on more. The FD we have is a hand full. ANY ADVICE????????????

[JBrennan]

We're new too so I don't have much advice to offer. I will tell you that we have 2 birth children and originally thought we'd take 1 foster child. A sibling group (twins) came into care and we accepted them. It has been a month. THey are tough to handle as well. Many tantrums and lots of screaming. My husband is very involved with them as well. A real hands on dad. (Thank goodness) It takes both of us to keep up with the four kids. Plus, our birth kids (ages 8 and 7) are awesome. Things are getting easier. Or maybe we are just getting used to the chaos. I guess I would consider how much support you have from family, how much time you'll have to offer another child, how much patience you have left. Basically can you meet the needs of another child and still continue meeting the needs of the rest of your family?

[marsha4]

You would be amazed at how quickly you adapt to taking more than one foster child in at a time. We have taken in sibling groups, and had up to four foster children at a time. For the most part, it's great. The kids have their siblings their to help comfort them and ease the questions of what's happening to my brother or sister. They have the person their who shares their thoughts and fears about seeing their mom/dad again, and the whole scary world of being in a new place. My girls would not sleep unless they slept in the same bed for many months. They also have their built in playmate their with them.

[lostboys]

We have had up to six at a time. Ages 6 to 17. We have 4 teens right now 3 are 15yrs old and one is 17yrs and are considering a sibling group two boys ages 8 and 14. It takes a lot of structure, patience,time, love and dedication. These children have so many needs. We are very lucky to have the support in the school that we have. We take boys and my husband is able to be home with them when they are home. It is very important to be honost with yourself about how much you can handle. You have to think of the children you already have. Is taking more children going to ruin the security of the child you already have. I always take into consideration the needs of the children already in the home, before I take any more. My husband is great with the children He teaches them so much. They work on a lot of projects, building, RC cars, landscaping. They are able to learn a lot of life skills because he has the time to spend with them.

[Withay]

I believe that it also depends on the ages of the children. I am a single foster parent who most generally gets infants.

Currently I have a 12 mo girl and a 3 mo boy. This morning a 13 day old boy left (I was doing an evaluation on him).

I am certified for two children, birth through five years. When I have the third child it is with the understanding that it is short-term. Besides, in our state you can only have two children under the age of two without getting an exception.

Most of the babies come to me from the hospital, or by the age of 3 months. Some stay awhile and some are here for only very short periods of time.

It all depends on what you can handle. I would recommend talking it over between you and also with your certifier.

Blessings,
Lynda

[Kate1129]

It may sound scary, but adding another child isn't as hard as I thought it was. I was terrified, but with structure and a rock solid schedule, no problems!!

You can do it!

[jackiesbooks]

Is the other child - a sibling of the one you have? I have found siblings SOMETIMES calm the other one down. I would get as much information as possible.

[Malificient]

smlanders, Yes, since your looking for advice...... DON'T take another child into your home, if the 1 you do have is a handful.... that's a recipe for added stress that you and your current fd doesn't need. There are far more easier ways of finding a playmate for your fd, aside from adding another child into your home FT..... hope this helps, malificient, ps. if your looking for the 'other" ways of getting her a playmate, email me and i'll share some of my ideas with ya...

[kaylasmom]

I think I have been scared every time I have got my license expanded. I think it's only natural, you never know what your going to get. ( in terms of behavior, you know your getting a child...lol) Anyways, I have the same advise to you as I'd have to a bio mom, If your having another child because you feel your 1st one needs a playmate, DON"T. If your having, another child because you WANT another child then i'd say go for it. But remember, if she's a handful now she will get worse when you bring another child into your home. Maybe for only awhile, but it will happen. So before you make your desion, think about why you are doing it , for a playmate or to have another child. I have 2 bio kids 10 & 11 and I started out with 1 fd, then I got a boy, all was good until I got 2 more boy's, my fs was very upset. But, i'm in fostercare to help kids, I love it, and Yes sometimes there a handful, but like it was said before have lots of structure. Good luck and let us know whjat you deside and how it goes.




Married 12 years
bio mom of 2
foster mom of 4