[Gotta_luv_em]

My husband and I recently had a 17 yr old foster girl removed because she was mean to the younger children and stole money from us. She retaliated by accusing my husband of sexual abuse and accusing me of knowing about it and telling her to be quiet. She knew that she would not be believed so she convinced our 9 yr old foster daughter(whom we are in the process of adopting) that when we gave her hugs and kisses especially daddy that we were being "bad to her". Our 9 yr old told the investigater what the 17 year old told her to say but later told them that she was scared because the 17 yr old told her that she would hunt her down. DCFS took our other 2 foster daughters and the 9 yr old out of our house. The other girls are 3 and 5. We have had them for 3 years ever since the youngest was 8 hours old. There has never been any Bparents involved and we go to court in May to adopt them also. We have hired an attorney, but has anyone else gone thru anything like this? We are devastated because we always treat these kids like our "Real" children, but when it suites the agency they pull them out and say it is in the best interest. We have been told that it will all be nothing, but it may be 60 days before we get the kids back. Sorry I just am at a lost without the girls and My husband and I feel all alone.

[Jensboys]

There are many, many foster parents who have been through what you are going through.

Please know that you are in my prayers!!!

Jen

[Kate1129]

I am sorry you are going through this. I have not been in your shoes.

I will be praying for you and your children!

[tybeemarie]

What a nightmare! It is terrible to think of the anxiety the girls feel being removed from your home! And the poor 9 year old must feel just awful. I really am sorry your family is experiencing this kind of trauma. I'll say a prayer for you tonight. And for the 17 year old. She must be very lost to do this kind of a thing.

[mom2GRLC]

I am sooo sorry this is happening to your family. We were told about stories like that when we started fostering but never thought it would happen to us because we take the younger kids and babies most of the time.

This last year we adopted our 5 year old and 13 month old. We had a 2 1/2 y old fd who had been with us for over a year and a half who's bmom had just signed over her rights and we were about to adopt.

We also had 2 fs's that were 3 & 4. The 4 year old was severely delayed and he got some bruses on him while he was at the park. A few days later at school at the early intervention school someone saw the bruses and somehow asked him how he got them and he said his Dad did it. They didn't even ask us what happened they immediately reported us.

Just a month after finding out we would be our daughters adoptive parents....in an instant they removed her as well as the two boys. The investigation only lasted 30 days but it was the worst time in my entire life. All the stress gave me insomnia and terrible migrains several times a day.

We were able to get our little girl back right after the month was over....we were very blessed...I've heard of other families having to wait much longer. The only thing that held me together was my faith in God and putting it all in his hands.

Please PM me if you need to talk. It really is so difficult while you are going through it. The police were very nice....it was just the seperation from my daughter for so long that was killing me.....and the fear of them opening up a case and loosing my two adopted children as well. How can you prove you are innocent? They are supposed to prove you guilty but it feels so much the other way around. Just be as patient and coaperative as you can and pray that it will all be over soon.
God Bless!!!

Ps. it was at this time that my compassion for the parents of our foster children really started to sink in. They had to endure so much worse...including loosing their children in the end....and I know Heavenly Father wanted me to learn more compassion for those in similiar situations.

[Dianna]

My heart goes out to you. I have never been in a more difficult situation than the victim of false allegations. And we didn't get anyone removed as all our adoptions were finalized. I will pray for you also. God and Faith got me through. I will pray for your children also.

[mitzie1125]

Sorry to hear about your heart ache. It happens more times then you thing. We had been foster parents for 17 years and never had a problem. A little over a year ago we had three kids two boys age 2 and a girl 1 year old. We also had a baby that was about 4 months old. We asked that the baby be removed as it was too much on us. Well then everything started happening. They tried to get us for abuse on the baby. Said she had bruses on her which turned out to be mongoling spots (very common in AA kids). Well it was over ruled and then the next night mare. We had one of the boys for two years since he was 2 days old and were planning on adopting him. He had developed a problem of
spearing his fetus all over the place. We had talked with his doctor and were trying to deal with it. Not very pleasant.
CPS showed up at our home just after one of his messes and decided we weren't watching them close enough. They
decided to remove him and we told them to take the others too. Well so and investigation this time came up with no
ruling. They couldn't prove anything was done wrong on our part but cited us with violations that were stupid. Our home was closed and we never saw the kids again. We have never been the same and will never forget the heart ach. We loved the kids and wanted to adoped them. Our little boy only new us as his parents. What must he think? I never dreamed in all my years this could happen to me. We went the whole 9 yards to the pier meeting and still didn't win. All we can think of what we could have and should have or should have said. I thought we would be foster parents for the rest of our lives and we loved all 140 kids we had. We will never get over it. We would still love to be foster parents for the kids sake. You just never know when CPS will turn on you. This happened all within a month or each other.

foster mom for 17 years
adopted one
raised 3 bio kids
7 grand kids