[tlc4kidz]

Just had to share...today was my parents 50th wedding anniversary. We got up at 6am, drove 2 hours, cooked, decorated the church, celebrated, cleaned, had a photography session, and drove 2 hours home. All 4 of my kids were so wonderful, but especially the babies. I know they had to be exhausted without their regular naps (I know I was ), but they were they life of the party and never fussed once!

I'm also proud of my parents. They gave each of the grandaughters an old handkerchief of my grandmas with a note that said they were to save it for their weddings....for "something old", and they wished each of them at least 50 years of happiness in their marriages. They included our fd. I know we are finalizing in a couple weeks, but it meant so much to have her included. You see, my dh's side doesn't think they are "real" yet. My MIL explained to me they would just get "a little something" under the tree, but not as much as the rest of the grandkids this year. My SIL didn't even want them in our annual Christmas picture because they aren't adopted yet and "what if something happens."

Sorry for the rambling, but I'm tired and full and knew there might be SOMEONE here who would understand! Thanks for listening!!!!

[L-A-J-C-R-C]

Hi,

You should be very proud

What a special gift your parents gave your children! I'm sure they'll cherish it forever.

I'm sorry your in-laws aren't more supportive. Hopefully you'll get through the adoption and their attitudes will change.

Congratulations to your parents!

Michelle

[leenab]

It's great that your parents are so supportive, sorry about your in-laws. In our family it was the exact opposite, my in-laws were great and treated our children like they were OUR CHILDREN. My parents were really bad in the beginning and treated our chilren like they were NOT grandchildren. We even went through the whole situation of not wanting to be grandma & grandpa. So my boys really don't call them g & g. And now that both Om and Raj are adopted my parents want to be Nana & Grandpa Bugman instead of Donna & Bugman. Go figure. The boys aren't quite getting it yet, as to why Donna wants to be Nana. The sort of understand Bugman wanting to be grandpa Bugman. It all came as a shock to us. Because at Halloween Raj's card said, "Love Nana & Grandpa Bugman" for a minute we though maybe my dad got divorced and remarried without telling us. But then I opened Om's card and it said Donna & Bugman. So I knew my mom was still there.

My in-laws have been great and sent the boys amazing presents signed grandma & grandpa. And constantly call to talk to the children. My MIL is amazing and asks for the boys measurements so she can get clothes custom made for them. (My mother has already bought clothes 2 sizes too big because she forgot what size they were.) My MIL is coming to visit for 6 months this spring since FIL passed away; the boys are so excited and want her to share a room with them. She's going to have her own room but told the boys they are welcome to sleep over in her room anytime. They're all so excited.

Hang in there fosterma, after the adoption you'll see a complete 180. It's kinda creepy though so watch out.

-LeenaB

[yanknrebel]

FOsterma,

That is wonderful about your parents wedding anniversary and the kids being good. My husband , my two kids, myself and my inlaws all rented a van and drove to Orlando to go to Disneyworld in 2002. It just so happened that this trip had been planned for while ,so imagine our surprise when we had a 2 week old baby girl (our fd we are gettting ready to adopt) that we were adding to our caravan trip to FL. This was a 14 hour trip and she was WONDERFUL. Could not ask for a better baby.

As for the whole "not quite family yet syndrome, I too know about that. MY mother in law, is all about being proper. My husband and I were married in his town of WI. We had gone up there for the week to get married. JUst two days before the wedding, my MIL had been sitting in the car with myself, and my two kids, while my husband and FIL went into a local convience store. While sitting in the car, my MIL had an aquaintance come over to the car to speak to her. SHe introduced me as her son's fiancee and my kids as "her children from a previosu marriege". SHe refused to let them call her or refer to her as "grandma" until the day of the wedding AFTER the ceremony. My FIL could care less. He was GRANPA and proud of it.

We had also been taking pictures once a month of our fd at a local photography studio. My MIL would not hang up pix of our fd until just very recently because she wasn't sure she was going to be her granddaughter. UGHH!!! That really made me mad. SO much so, that I stopped sending her pix. NOw she will see a picture and ask "Why don't I have that one"?

Fosterma, You have to make sure and post a pic of your kids when the adoption is final.

[tlc4kidz]

Thanks....I knew you guys would understand.

Leena,
Isn't your MIL from India? What an awesome experience for your children to get to spend time with her! I bet it will be healing for her, too after the recent loss of her husband. Your right, I'm sure things will turn around after the adoption. It's just hard when in our eyes they ARE our children and it matters not one little bit how they got here.

Yanknrebel,
CAN"T WAIT to post pix!!!! You have know idea how much all of the support has been through this waiting. I'm hoping you can post soon also!! I know all parents think their kids are beautiful, but I heard over and over yesterday from friends, relatives and strangers how gorgeous they are. I even overheard a few people commenting when they thought I wasn't listening . I have always taught my kids that outer beauty isn't everything and will teach these guys that too, but they will have so much to deal with that it is a little smile on them from God that they are so adorable!!

Thanks again to both of you for being there!

[leenab]

It does get better. Yanknrebel I can relate to the picture thing. Both of my grandmothers and MIL get all the pictures of the boys, but after seeing my mother put them in a drawer and not hang them on the wall or even fridge she stopped getting pictures. So now she has to ask me for pictures if/when she wants them.

Yes, my MIL is from India, where building a family through adoption is not very common, except in recent movies: Kubbi Kushi Kubbi Gum. So that movie helped them a lot and it's a VERY positive spin on adoption for the most part, very different from US movies though. My in-laws have been great about everything. My MIL even wanted to name our first child, so he became Om. She was so supportive, even although she was thousands of miles away so we let her name him. He was almost Omkar, but I stepped in, not wanting a child who could be nicknamed Kar. So she then suggested just Om. And so Om got his name. Yes, I let a woman I've never met name my son. But she's been so accepting of the idea of adoption, and she wanted to be included and called grandma from day one. We're all looking forward to her visit.

Just wanted to let you guys know. I'm going to be without internet access from 12/3 to 12/17. We're moving on the 4th of december and won't have the internet connected until the 17th. Yes more room for the boys, dh, MIL & I. And eventually the scooby doo dog that Om wants for his adoption present.

-LeenaB

[L-A-J-C-R-C]

Sleep over in her room anytime, that's just too cool and I bet they take her up on it too!

I have wonderful In laws that I know I could live with for 6 months but, as much as I love my parents and as much as they love our new additions, I know I could NOT live with them for longer than a week (and that's pushing it) LOL.

Good luck with your move on the 4th, wow, that's next weekend isn't it?

Michelle

[tlc4kidz]

Michelle,
Thanks for your support, too....somehow I missed your post when I was here earlier. Yes, it is quite an event to celebrate 50 years! Not only did my parents, but my mom's parents and her mom's parents did, too. I'm hoping to make it 4 generations.....if I can put up with dh that long

[alle_h]

sorry it's way off topic but where can i get that movie?
thanks,
alle

[leenab]

alle_h,
I believe a lot of online rental places carry hindi movies, possibly under the bollywood category. Unless you live near an Indian video store, in an Indian section of town. It shouldn't be too hard to find as it has a HUGE star cast: Amitaub Buchin & Sharuk Khan. (sorry for the bad spelling). It's also refered to as K3G.

There's also a really great movie out there with Amitaub & his wife as well where they have 1 adopted son as well as numerous biochildren. Well the parents retire and want to live with their children. The bios don't treat the parents well and split them up. Then the adopted son steps in and takes care of his parents. Such a great movie. BAGHBAN is the name of the movie.

Word of warning though, Indian movies tend to be about 3 hours long. They are subtitled though and you can pause them thank goodness. Oh and most movies have songs & dance sequences in them. Sort of like our "Sound of Music".

Enjoy,
LeenaB

[tlc4kidz]

leena,
Good luck with the move!! I found a couple of great books at the library for kids about moving to a new home that were very helpful....we moved on my son's 3rd birthday. Check back in when your up and running online......our 2 should be ours forever by then (Boy, it sounds UNBELIEVABLE that it could be so soon!)