[Senecca]

it's been almost 8 months since we've had a placement.

They called saturday night with a need for an emergency bed for a 7yr old girl.

they have told me she will be here till Wednesday but now that has changed to, 2wks to 1 month.

they say she has MAJOR behavior problems. However she has not been diagnosed by a doctor. We will have her assessed. the sw used "ADHD" to describe her.

I have told them that I will not take ADHD children as I do not have the skills yet.

they told me that she will do well in my home because I only have a 12yr old bio daughter and I will be able to give her the one on one attention she needs.

My bio daughter has never once disobeyed us. She keeps herself amused and never argues over the rules. (they know this, I told them in my home study)

I'm SO nervous about this placement, that I can't seem to relax. She's honeymooning right now and I'm on edge waiting for the trials to begin.

She's not in school yet as we need to arrange transport. But the sw told me her school principal suggests she get a "fresh start in a new school", sounds like they're fed up with her.

the thing thats making me really nervous is that they are telling me how terrible her behavior is......so far I don't see it. I'm on high alert, just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Do you think the sw was telling me "she'll do well in your home..." just to get me to say yes?

Do you think that in the future I should disregard the time frame quoted by the sw?

[jolean12]

I know you were happy to get a call but it seems you may have your hands full. Just try to do your best to not make assumptions in the way you treat her as she will feel it.

Although if you have said you cannot take a child with ADHD you may have a hard time gettin a placement in your home. I have had over 40 children in my home and I think I have had 2 children that were not effected by ADHD. All these children come into care with issues due to the conditions that they lived in. What are the ages that you were looking to foster?

Good luck, maybe this will be the right placement for her and things will be OK. Please keep us posted.

[shirleyh]

If you have never been around or parented a child with behaviors, then yes, you've got your hands full. But I'm sure that you have a good support team behind you that you can talk to that have experience.

But please do not confuse ADHD children with bad children or always disobeye. My son is probably the poster child for children with ADHD. He also has Tourette Syndrome. But his medications really help him a lot. He is not a bad kid, he simply needs several reminders and redirection when he is trying to accomplish something. It does not mean that this child is not wanting to do what you tell them, they just can't focus on but one step at a time. (I hope this isn't taken wrong, I am simply wanting to spread the correct information about children with ADHD).
I also agree with the previous response that the behaviors she may exibit may be due to not having any boundaries or rules.
If you have any questions about ADHD, I would be more that happy to answer any questions you might have.
I'll be sending prayers your way for patience and understanding.