[hope4kids]

I just got a call asking me to consider taking a pregnant 18 year old. I usually take younger kids. I am not even sure what questions I should be asking in order to make this decision. I need to make a decision by the end of the week. Anyone had any experience in this area? What could I expect? What should I ask?

[Harambe2]

I have a teen right now. She was pregnant when she got here and now she has a beautiful baby girl. I just asked all the questions I had on the list they gave us in my training class. Of course, the worker had absolutely no info on the girl before she got here so I kind of had to take her blind. Personally I'm very glad I did. If you send me a private message I'll be happy to tell you anything you want to know.

Take care,
Dawn

[alicia hunter]

I think it all depends on the girl. I was asked to take my daughter's bmom as a foster placement- this was when the baby was 11 months. I chose not to because bmom was 13, angry, not open to suggestions, violent and deceptive. It would have put the baby at risk. I know that there are teen mothers that can be great girls that were just looking for someone to love them. I'd be more concerned about her history if you are at all willing to take a teen parent.

[seedsower]

Does she have history of running away and drug usage?
What are her plans for the infant?
Is the father involved?
Has she had pre-natal care and is there any problems identified with the pregnancy or infant ?

[hope4kids]

I will meet her soon and am looking forward to it. Thanks for the replies. The things I have heard about her sound encouraging. She is not a runner, not a drug or alcohol user, found herself prenatal care, agreed to start counseling, and wants to learn how to parent her child. Her main difficulty is school. She is good with younger children and has been a reliable babysitter. My house is small though, and she would have very little privacy. I have two small children who are good at demanding attention too, so she needs to meet them and see my place before we can know if this is a possible fit.

I am hoping it will be. I would see it as a privilege to help her be able to learn the skills she wants to be a good mom, encourage her in a scray, challenging time of her life, and help equip her to still reach the goals she has set for herself in life. I really think it would be more of an intensive mentoring role I would play in her life. I believe that no life is a mistake, and this baby does not have to mean the end of the dreams she has for herself. I would be honored to be a part of helping her reach those dreams.

[Sharon]

Good luck! I hope it works out.
Many people would not do it, and I don't condemn them for that... I doubt that I would be willing or able to foster a pregnant teen. But she sounds like a good person, someone who has experienced some misfortune in her short life and could really use a little understanding and compassion.
I know that when I was a pregnant teenager myself, the world seemed like a lonely, frightening and potentially dangerous place, and I sought a safe and quiet place to rest for the duration of my pregnancy. Maybe this is what she needs... a safe refuge where she can let down her guard, take care of her health, review her options, and plan for the future.
I have a lot of respect for your decision to consider this situation. I hope it turns out to be a positive experience for both you and the girl.
Best wishes, ~ Sharon

[RiverGal]

Like Sharon, I was on the flip-side of your situation...I was the pregnant teen. My family was firm in their decision not to allow me back in their home, so I was matched with a foster family. I did all I could to make things work and was appreciative to the couple for taking me in. Unfortunately, the man was a pervert living behind the facade of Christianity. He slipped into my bedroom and attempted to rape me.

I would have given my right arm for somewhere safe, somewhere I could get the necessary medical attention, and someone to guide me. I had been a "runner" for the past couple years before getting pregnant, but wanted to do things the right way for the child's sake. Had I had the opportunity then, I might not have had to spend the last decade searching for my child I was unable to raise.

Each situation is different, but I would have been so blessed to have someone that recognized my potential. Good luck in making your decision.

Debra

[bromanchik]

I recently fostered a pregnant teen. She was 16 when she came to us and 17 when she left. We still keep in touch and are a support for her. I also had two small children in a small house. If you want to talk contact me through my website. I have a toll-free number listed.