[Sue71]

I have a question that may sound silly to you but I am very serious in prepare to talk to my husband so I would love to know how to deal with some issues when they come up. Since I have been lurking on this site for about 5 years, I've been seen many adoptive parents here that have a total 5 or more kids. How do you arrange the rooms for kids? We live in a 3 bed room house and are shopping for a 4 bed room house with a basement in this area but I thought if we can have a big family eventually, should we get a bigger house now? I would prefer not to move again so I think we should prepare for it since we are shopping for a new home. How would you arrange the kids for their rooms? do they all have to have their own rooms? Would it be ok if we adopt a boy (for example: not being abused in the past) and have the boy share a room with our BS? does a room in the basement have to have windows? Just curious and would love to see if we can find something that fit our needs for the long run. Thank you

[MomInCorazon]

Your best bet is to find out the room size requirements in your area (you can call the local DCF office to get that info). They vary greatly by state and that will determine how many bedrooms you will need and what size they will have to be. And yes, all levels, including the basement, will have to have a big enough window as a point of exit.

Good luck!

[farmchick]

We had the gigantic house before we had the foster kids (we have four bio sons as well), and have seven bedrooms - only two of which are in use. Four is the official maximum number of kids they will certify us for, but they've had no trouble writing waivers for us to take up to 6 at a time (mostly sibling groups). We have two adjoining bedrooms that we have set up for up to four children (same gender or all under 7 by our state's laws), plus multiple other bedrooms we could add (we had three in use with one sibling group, plus a baby in our bedroom.)

The laws are highly variable so definitely check them out - some states allow bunk beds, some don't, some states allow babies in your room, some don't, some allow opposite gender siblings to share up to 4 some to 7 or 8. It is also important to remember that you could get kids who SHOULD NOT share rooms or space even if they technically could for various reasons (bad patterns of history among siblings, tough personality conflicts). Some places allow basement rooms, some don't. I only know the laws for us - bunk beds permitted, babies in room until 3, opposite gender siblings in the same room until 7, and then size and dimensional requirements.

If I were house shopping and wanted a large family, here are some of the things I'd look for:

Large rooms that can be set up flexibly. or alternately, more smaller ones. So if I would have four bedrooms, I might choose a house with larger rooms, but with five take smaller bedrooms.

A second bath if possible for adolescence ;-). I really like washstands in rooms for older kids as well, so that they can put on makeup, brush hair and wash hands for dinner without the bathroom.

Room to add on, or potentially adaptable space - even if you can't afford a five bedroom house now, maybe you could build an addition later - but where would it go? Or perhaps a room could be turned into a master or teen bedroom over the garage or in the basement - think flexible.

Lots of outdoor and indoor play space - you can get away with most kids sharing a comparatively small room if everyone has places for their toys and activities elsewhere. Remember, bio kids, adopted kids and parents can sleep almost anywhere ;-) as long as they safe and not a fire hazard, so if you have some larger rooms that fit the requirements of your county, you can also use other space for those who don't come in under DCFS rules. For example, there are no more than 3 kids to a room here, but my bio sons share 4 together (although they do this by choice, as we have 7 bedrooms ;-)).