[skipchick]

Okay, this may never happen, but it really could. We went in to sign the last of our adoptive placement papers today. Our two kiddos will move in on Friday. We already have two kids, and so that makes 4. We feel pretty maxed out at this point. The case files said that they encouraged Mom to be on birth control, but she was not interested. She just turned 24. Then, the question came up about siblings today. We were told that if Mom ever had more, and they found out about it, we would probably be notified. Our mouths kind of hung open. Of course, we would cross that bridge if we ever came to it, but it was kind of a new thought for us. They just told us to discuss what we might do if that ever came up. Has anyone ever had a situation like this actually happen? I am really just curious, and will leave the rest of it up to God. I don't really know if we could handle another one, especially an infant. We are both almost 40. I might be mistaken for the grandmother at high school graduation. Ha ha. Anyway, just wanted to see how often this happens.

[Bamamom07]

a lot.
Your kids' other mom could be done, or have 10 more at her age. It is something for you to think about. You'll probably feel pressure from yourself to take an additional sibling if that occurs, but stick with what you feel your family can handle. You could stop now, take one or two more, (or more), or hope any new little ones be taken by someone who will be willing to arrange sibling visits. Oh yeah, birth daddy and his relatives are in line ahead of siblings when placing babies where I live, so it's never a given that future babies will go into the system.

[athikers]

Be prepared for the call.

Our kids' parents are all in their twenties. We fully expect to be called for at least one out of the four of them. We don't know what our answer will be due to our sons extreme needs we think we will be done once he gets home. But, maybe our desire to keep sibs together will change our minds. I dunno!

[mbulldis]

We have actually had this happen twice. We adopted Internationally and were called by our daughter's birth family to take her newborn baby sister. We adopted our daughter at three weeks, our second daughter, her sister, at eight weeks. Then, while doing foster care, we adopted a little boy. He was placed with us at 2 days. His birth mother was in her late 30's. We got a call 15 months later to take his baby brother. They are now 2 and 3 and mom is in her 40's. We have never met her but we are thinking she is done having babies. Our younger children are now 10, 8, 3 and 2, our older children 26, 24, 21, and 20. We feel our family is complete but we take each day as it comes. We still foster, but only one baby at a time. And yes, we are also grandparents to two amazing little girls, ages 3 and 1. It is always good to talk about what you would do but, really, none of us knows what the future will bring or where we will be when that call comes.

Maryann

[mommytoEli]

it just happend to us. ds was 4.5 so we thought we were "in the clear" lol...but no dice. baby a came anyway. i cried when i got the call....i didn't expect that....but the emotions that overcame me when i thought about my son's brother needing a home were too much. i could NOT say no. i realized that day, she could have 12 more kids...and if they all needed a home, i guess i'd parent 12 more children. for me, it is all about the siblings, i will take in whoever comes along and trust God that i will grow some more patience.....lol...and maybe a money tree. new baby is such a blessing....it is neat to watch the two brothers interact...they are so similar.

[HappyHopefulMommy]

We were placed with a sib set of 3 this past summer. At disclosure we were told they had a younger brother in another fost/adopt home. But we were asked if that did not work out, would we take him? We did not even have to think about it and said, "yes". 4 months later we got that call and now have all 4. But, birthmom is only 24 and has had 4 kids (had first one at 15). We want one more kid and want that one to be an infant. So we would definitely said yes to one more if she had more. But, at some point we know we would be done. I know there are birthmoms out there that have like 10 children.

[HappyTwinsMom]

We didn't see it coming, but it has indeed happened to us. Our twin girls were adopted at birth in a private agency adoption. Fast forward seven years and birthmom's 3 yr old son & 2 yr old daughter are in foster care. We are the "family placement" because no one in her family can pass a home study.

Just waiting right now for word on TPR. Bio-dad is relinquishing voluntarily, bio-mom may as well.

[vegaschristina]

A month after finalizing my oldest, we got that call. So we brought home Bubba in January. Fast forward to September and we brought home the baby too. Bmom relinquished on them in April and we're hoping to finalize next year.

She is currently expecting and due in Feb. I've already told the case workers that we are open to sibling visits, but we will not be taking in baby 4. Our kids' bmom is only 22 and we've got tons of reproductive years ahead of us.

[Bamamom07]

We're hoping TPR will actually go through in couple of weeks on our four, it's been put off so many times already. We are anxiously waiting to see what will happen with newborn currently in mom's care. We have decided we will take the baby if asked, and keep the siblings together, but at the same time, it's just so sad. The CW thinks the baby will not stay long with mom, due to several concerns regarding her and father, but of course father's relatives have to be looked at before us as possible placement for the baby. I am just waiting and wondering if we'll get a call in next few days, weeks, months....asking if we can take the baby immediately. With a bio, you get to prepare. I've started gathering a few things, just in case, but can't be obvious and get the kids all excited.

[Prettyboicris]

My wife and I are almost ready to begin accepting placements and we have discussed this. If we have the space and are able to meet the child's needs then we will do it. If we end up with a child who has a bmom that is young and still actively producing then we would cut off when we feel we are getting too close to being overwhelmed or when we hit 6 children since our max is 6. We want to have more than one child and this sounds like a good way for the children to stay connected as well has have brothers and/or sisters in our home.

[DannieAS]

I've been told that this happens quite frequently in the county I'm in. In fact there was a situation like this in our area....mom is still young and the new baby is number 8....going to a sibling and there are 3 adoptive homes all within 10 min. of each other so the siblings will always have contact. So depending on the situation, it may not be necessary to take on more than you think you can handle.

this particular case above, all adoptive parents are in contact and they have park play dates and stuff so that the kids will always be in contact.

[Canadamom92]

We haven't found our child or children yet, but we do try to keep the possibility in mind when we're considering kids. If Mom has two children aged 8 and 10 it's different than if she has two aged 2 and 1.

We hadn't really thought about that possibility until we were presented with two boys who were 6 and 7 at one point. They had sibs that were 4, 2, and 1, that had been adopted by another family. Any family considering the 6 & 7 year old had been told that they would get first choice for the next baby (who was on the way), since the other adoptive family was not ready for more yet. The bio Mom and Dad had told CAS that they would keep having kids because they felt it was their Christian Duty, and they figured that eventually CAS would let them keep one .

[Becki_in_IN]

Our eldest dd's adoption had been finalized 4 months when they called about younger dd. We took her as well. We didn't hear anything for years. Then a month before I turned 49 they called and said the girls had a baby brother and that his foster parents were too old to adopt him. Foster parents, what about me? K has lived for us a year and a half and his adoption still isn't final. The really sad thing: There is another sibling. Her name is Katlie. She is 8 1/2. We were never contacted about her. She sounds so much like my youngest dd. I grieve that we will probably never know her.