[bettynme]

So far we have had two visits with "our boy" as we call him. One was at a restaurant and the other was at our home for an afternoon of swimming and BBQ. The first visit was tense. The second was better. We all had fun and he talked to us a little more. This week he will visit for a whole day. We are going to have as normal a Sat as possible(with an added kid) so he can experience a regular day with us and us with him. He is resistant (tears and crying with foster mom) to the move and does not want to leave his school and foster family. If all goes well moving day will be in the beginning of July. We are excited but tentative as we want this to go well for all and want to make it as easy on him as possible.

[HappyHopefulMommy]

bettynme - hope the transition goes well. I am sure he will adjust well.

[Jenkay]

betty what a great idea i am so going to do that! It will also give me and my son a project to keep us busy while we wait.

happy and lost i know exactly how you feel it is a frustrating ride! we were told it takes no time at all to be placed and it has taken us forever! we gave up just weeks ago you should go and read some of my frustrating posts to see that it can and will work out. hang in there! this mb is a great place for support!

[Jenkay]

bettynme i was thinking about you today, wondering how things were going with your little guy?

Things are moving slow with R we still havent gotten her file so we dont know when visitation will start. The frustration continues but at least we're finally moving forward!

[JeannineW]

I'm so excited. I got my first call from our SW. She had two children - an 11 yo girl needing a 1 week respite and an 8 yo boy looking for an adoptive home. The 11yo would probably have worked if DH wasn't leaving the country for 2 weeks on Saturday! I just didn't feel like I could add an extra kid when I'm on my own for 2 weeks with my own 4 kids. My hats are off to all the single parents out there!

We actually had an 11 yo girl and a 3 yo boy stay with us last week. They were my friend's kids but I didn't know the kids and they didn't know me before hand. It was interesting comparing it to what it might be like to have foster kids. My girls really enjoyed having the 11 yo around.

Oh well. Hearing from my SW just reminded me that with adoption and foster care your life can change with just one phone call. I've already told DH that "our" kids will probably arrive while he is gone. Yikes!

[bettynme]

Yikes is right JeanineW, I know how you feel. I am a teacher and have off the summer. Although I am excited about our "match"(8yr male) and how the transition is going so far, it is a little intimidating adding a young man to the picture of my summer as dh is working full time plus...
We have always been the drop off point for relatives and friends children.... Days or even weeks at a time for nieces, nephews and friends. I teach rambuncious preschoolers and have directed a school serving 110 children. I am the ed coordinator of our sunday school program and have a student population (4-18)of about 80 kids each sunday and a staff of 18 teachers. One boy should be a piece of cake....I have been trying to figure out why my mind is racing. Partly nerves, I am definitely excited. We have been praying for "our boy" most of his natural life and now he is here...
Since I was last on the board, we had a day long visit. When I arrived at the foster home in the morning, he was actually happy to see me. He made eye contact and smiled. I asked if I could have a hug as I greeted him and he complied. We went to the store for a short errand. We went home and did some weeding in the yard. We went to pick up my husband from word at noon and then had lunch at the diner. He seemed to understand the purpose of our visits. When we asked him how he felt about it he said, "I'm nervous." We told him that we are too. The rest of the day went well. He is very easily distracted, but at the same time, easily redirected. A few tests, small of course, but I don't expect anything less from such a high energy personality. I am sure there will be more to come. At the end of the night, he ate a full meal.( He had not eaten much in our presence)He also agreed to come for the weekend. We will pick him up Friday and he will stay until Tues. He will go on vacation for 10 days and if all goes smoothly, he will move in on the 14th or 15th. When we dropped him off, he gave both dh and I a hug and the fm cried. That made me cry and my husband snicker...>(He's like that) So all seems to be going well.
I bet you won't ask again, Jenkay. Thanks alll for the venue...I feel better...blessings all around....
betty

[HappyHopefulMommy]

Jeannine - Glad you are at least getting calls. It feels good to know that your homestudy is getting out there. I hope you get placed soon. I remember being at my sisters a few months ago and her youngest was bout 8 months. I was watching him for a little bit and he just kept squirming out of my arms and laying on the ground and crying. I too thought to myself, "this is what it may be like when we adopt, I am a complete stranger to my nephew and he would rather cry on the ground that let me hold him". It was a hard realization for me.

Betty - thanks for the update, hope all continues to go well.

Still not much new for us. Our homestudy is now currently out for 2 different sib sets. One is 2 boys and one is 2 girls. We are praying we are selected for one of them. It has to happen sooner or later, right? Our agency usually says if you are waiting for an infant, you will probably wait about 6 months. Since we were asking for a sib set, they said our wait would be much shorter. We have now been waiting 5 months. All the kids workers tell our worker we have a great homestudy, but they choose someone else because of a simple thing like, the school district. We are really hoping for a placement this summer. It would be so nice to be placed while my daughter is out of school so she can spend time bonding with them with out school. We will see. We are suppose to be leaving in 1 1/2 weeks for a 2 week vacation, I can just see getting a call like the day before we are suppose to leave. Which is really just fine with me.

[Jenkay]

betty i will keep asking its great to hear whats going on with everyone.

Noelle and Jeannine my prayers will be with you guys for a match soon. Its hard for me to tell you guys to stay positive as I was really really not right up till we got the call about R. I know how hard it is all I can say is hang in there and keep praying.

[bettynme]

Hi all...
We made it through the weekend with J. He seemed to relax a bit more each day. He attitude was much more positive and the tone in his voice was much improved by the time we left this morning. He can be bossy with other kids and is impulsive... I think our greatest challenge will be to think faster than he does and help him make good choices. All in all we believe that this is a match and that we can....with much work and prayer....provide J with a stable and secure home in which to learn how to manage his life and emotions...We are very happy... He should move in mid July if all goes well.

Thanks to all on this board who supported me and answered questions and gave encouragement through this process. I got much clearer answers and truer information from her than most of the CW I have dealt with. Keep it up...And look out...I might come up with more questions yet....

[embuck]

I am now waiting to be matched!

I keep looking for stories today to help with the wait.

My agency made it appear like we will be waiting awile.

I am wondering if we should take in emergency placements during the wait!?

How is everyone else doing?

[arenee22]

I havent posted in awhile, but we are still waiting for the call. WE have been on the list for only about 3 weeks.

[HappyHopefulMommy]

bettynme - middle of July is not too far away! yeah

We are good - still just waiting. We are actually leaving for vacation on Friday and will be gone 2 1/2 weeks. I am so excited and looking forward to vacationing and not thinking about waiting for the phone to ring.(I am sure I will still think about it - but not as much)

[rraiford]

Today, we are introducing our son, who is three, to his new two-year-old brother. I am very excited and nervous too. Our son Q is an only and not used to sharing his mommy and daddy. My husband jokes that it will be like "Mortal Combat."

[HappyHopefulMommy]

Wow - let us know how it goes.

[buttascotchbaby]

OK, just a little, whiny vent I sent in an inquiry on an out of state (Oregon) boy almost 2 months ago. The contact person was super nice and very helpful. I had to harangue my LW to fax my home study up to OR but it was finally done on 6/7. I have been waiting to hear more, I was told that they HAD received a lot of home studies for him, he is still on their Heart Gallery web site, a couple of weeks ago I emailed the contact person to ask if there was any change/update to his status. She said "no". Ok... so, I'll wait patiently...

Today, I woke up early and spent a little time online before my kids got up and, lo and behold! This boy is now on another, nation wide, web site. So, I sent an inquiry through THAT website and then saw an email for a different contact person (turns out she is the recruiter) and shot her off an email, asking if they were putting him on more websites because none of the hime studies they had received were a good enough match for them? I explained that I had submitted my home study a while ago, I was still very interested, and added a few more details that are pertinent (sp?) to this child that would not be available in my HS.

The recruiter was awesome! She emailed me back very promptly, expressing surprise that he was on that particular website and letting me know that she had checked with his worker who said that THEY NEVER RECEIVED MY HOMESTUDY!

Anyway! The good news is that after a flurry of phone calls and emails I have more good contacts within that agency, my HS HAS been received by the correct person and I am still in the running to be considered for this boy. Also, the recruiter had very positive feedback for me after reading my profile on that particular website. She said I seem like I would be a great resource for their kids and she is very interested in seeing my HS. So, a little FYI for those looking at adopting from other states: Oregon says that they greatly value their out of state families In this long and many times frustrating journey those few, simple words were very heartening. Sometimes a little boost makes such a big difference.

Sooo, please keep fingers and toes crossed if this is meant to be for us Patience has never been one of my virtues but it is slowly becoming one! LOL

Have a great 4th of July weekend everyone!