[kate298]

ok, I have some questions for all the foster parents out here.......

Can a single person be a foster parent? Is there an age restriction i.e 26-40? Most of the time what are the ages of the FC? Is it possible to get a young foster child...? Can you chose them or are you just kind of "assigned" to one.? I know may have problems... but once they know that you are there friend, to the tend to be nicer and more well behaived or do they still seem guarded? any info would be appreciated... thanks Kate

[DianeScraps]

I will do my best, I am sure others can offer more details

Can a single person be a foster parent?
Yes

Is there an age restriction i.e 26-40?
I believe the minimum age in most states is 21, haven't heard of a maximum age as long as you are meidcally healthy. I do know of a couple that fosters in their mid-sixties

Most of the time what are the ages of the FC?
There is a full range - the only statistic I am familiar with is: In Sept 2000 there were 547,414 children is publically supported foster care
24% aged 1-5
25% aged 6-10
29% aged 11-15
1% under one year

Is it possible to get a young foster child...?
Definitely, the wait my be younger, but I know of people who have gotten a call the day the child was born and I have gotten calls for children as young as 6 months

Can you chose them or are you just kind of "assigned" to one.?
You definitely choose. In your homestudy you give 'guidelines' for the range of children you are interested in. For example ours said 1 or 2 girls aged 5-10, no RAD, willing to consider medical condiitons, etc... Our foster to adopt daughters came at ages 4 & 8

I know may have problems... but once they know that you are there friend, to the tend to be nicer and more well behaived or do they still seem guarded?
Every child is different. Our younger one was desperate to be open right away, the yr old took longer. These children come with histories that give them reasons to be guarded, but many are eager to love and be loved (RAD is a seperate issue - search the forums here for it and more info on those children)

[fostermomintx]

Kate,

I have been a single foster parent for nearly 2 years and my age range is 0-5. I am currently getting ready to adopt my 3 year old foster son who has been with me for over a year. I am 46 years old and haven't had a problem getting young kids. I have had 6 total, 3 were infants under 6 months and 3 toddlers under the age of 3.

It's been an interesting but very worthwhile journey. I chose this particular age range because of the limited amount of issues. Being single I feel I can only handle children who have normal issues or very few.

You have the right to ask questions about the child they are trying to place in your home. If you feel you cannot handle a certain situation please don't hesitate to turn down the placement. Don't worry that if you turn one down you will never get another call. I have turned down many and still get calls. You have to be comfortable with what you can handle, don't let them pressure you into taking on something you feel you can't do...

Good luck!
Marsha

[Yash]

Hi Kate,

I am a single woman. My first potential match was with a three month old boy, but that didn't work out. My second potential match was with a five day old boy who I am now in the process of adopting. My son will be 17 months tomorrow.

I told my social worker during the homestudy process that I wanted as young as possible, definitely under one. I also said I would prefer a girl over a boy, but when I heard the wait time for an adoptable infant girl was 9 to 18 months I quickly became open to either gender. I also asked to be considered for children that were low risk legally and little to none special needs. Almost 2 months after I was certified, I was holding my son in my arms.

I've now decided to foster. I'm now on the call list. My agency says they have a real need for foster parents, particularly for newborns because fost/adopt parents don't want to risk falling in love with babies that could possibly go back to their parents. I was told when they call with a possible baby, I would be told the child's legal status, visitation schedule, medical history, etc... I was worried I would have a child that had multiple visits with his or her parents and as a working woman that wouldn't work for my schedule. So it was good to hear, I would know these things before hand.

Best of luck with everything,

Yash

[kate298]

if you don't adopt the child, appx. how long do you usually have the child for? If you already are fostering the child, is it fairly easy to adopt if you so chose?

[Boulderbabe]

Hi----I'm a single foster mom. I've fostered nine and adopted one. My youngest came to me at 21 days old and the oldest was 16. You can choose your age range and let your agency know.

The most important thing is to set good boundaries, with your agency and with the kids. You're in the driver's seat: don't take kids you don't feel comfortable with. (In general, you'll get to hear about them but not meet them before placement).

[Boulderbabe]

Originally Posted by kate298

if you don't adopt the child, appx. how long do you usually have the child for? If you already are fostering the child, is it fairly easy to adopt if you so chose?

There's no way to tell how long the child will be with you. Some only come for a few days, until a relative can be found. Others come for the weekend and stay forever. It's totally unpredictable.

If you've been fostering a child for a considerable length of time (over 8 months or so), and the child is made free for adoption, the foster parents are often asked to adopt. Relatives have priority over foster parents in the first months of the case, but the longer the child is with you, the stronger your case is, because DSS does not want to disrupt the kid's life again.

Hope this helps!

[AlekseiGirl]

Hi Kate. I'm a single foster parent, and have been licensed for almost a year. I'm 26. In the past year I have had 5 foster children, all of them under age 1. Three newborns, two girls and a boy - straight from the hospital, a two week old boy, and a 7 month old boy. I am in the process of adopting my current foster daughter, she's almost five months old and has been with me since birth.

I've never gone more than 9 days without a placement when I have an opening...until I requested a child OVER age 2. I have had an opening for almost two months. So, the available children depend on the area you live in. Two of my babies were meth babies, one of them has mentally ill parents, the other two had no problems (besides their dysfunctional parents).

Seriously think about what age child will fit into your home. The babies are easy because they do not come with any bad habits. But, the sleepless nights are tough, especially when you almost always have a newborn in the house. And it is very tough to watch drug babies suffer...but it is also wonderful to watch them succeed. The oldest child I had was seven months, and he had a horrible sleep schedule, had never slept in a crib before, and was so scared when he arrived. It is heart wrenching what these little ones go through! If you have any more questions, you can PM me.

Good luck!

[Withay]

Kate -

Can a single person be a foster parent?
Most definitely

Is there an age restriction i.e 26-40?
I am single, no bio-children, 50 years young

Most of the time what are the ages of the FC?
I have had from 1 day to 6 years

Is it possible to get a young foster child...?
I have had 17 newborns in 4 years (47 kids total, with 43 under the age of 1 at placement)

Can you chose them or are you just kind of "assigned" to one?
Generally, here, my certifier or the cw calls and asks if I would be interested in a child(ren). I always ask what the age(s) is, who the cw is, any issues, reason for being in care, possible length of stay, plus several other questions. If I don't feel it would be a good match, I say 'no'. That has never been an issue with DHS, I still get calls all the time.

I know many have problems... but once they know that you are there friend, to the tend to be nicer and more well behaived or do they still seem guarded?
I work mainly with medically fragile infants who have moderate to severe issues and almost always have been exposed in utero to drugs and/or alcohol.

Blessings,
Lynda

[kate298]

does the system help financially at all? That would be my only concern with an infant or child/ren..... the bills could be ringing up fast

[Nicole Elaine]

Yes, you do get reimbursed for your expenses. Sometimes you can even get WIC depending on the age.

[kate298]

a few more questions what does TPR and WIC stand for?

[AlekseiGirl]

You do get a foster care subsidy, and how much it is depends on the state you live in. I live in CA and we are expected to pay for daycare with the subsidy, and that put me immediately in the negative. Daycare here is $800 for an infant, my subsidy is $624. I know some states pay for daycare, hopefully you are in one of those!

TPR stands for termination of parental rights.

WIC stands for Woman, Infants, and Children. It is a program that provides free formula for the infants in your care, which will save you about $200 a month. I believe they have programs for older children too, but I don't know much about them.

[Godmother]

TPR is termination of parental rights. The child becomes free for adoption.

WIC is Women, Infants, Children. A program that gives you vouchers for formula and food for children up to age 5. I don't know if 5 yr olds get it or not. You have to take the kid in every 3 months to be weighed and measured. For infants, you get formula. For older kids, you get cheese, eggs, milk, juice and cereal.

[jackiesbooks]

You can get WIC until the age of 5. The formula is replaced with milk, chese, eggs, peanut butter or rice and cereal.