[pugmamma]

This is truely the hardest part. I thought that after we were certified ( which was January) that I'd see kids, inquire, transition, take them home. Hmmm....Luckily, I spoke with one group's worker who shed a little light on me. I sopke to her back in the end of Feb. She told me she was making her decision by the end of MARCH! I was relieved to hear that no rash decisions are made, but also it will be nice to get a call saying, hey, we have a sibling group for you , come & bring them home. Any words of wisdom or experience?

[AmyAnne]

Know that the right child is out there and have faith that the right match will be made... it just may not be made in the time you want it

We were certified April 1, 2004. It was January of 2005 before our son was placed with us. The waiting's a killer, but take time for yourself now... you won't get a lot of it once placement happens!

[mab_123]

The wait is worth it and I have to agree take this time to enjoy the quite and sleep in . Although it may seem like forever keep busy with a hobby or something. We were certified in June of '04 and didn't get our "group" until July '05.

[oldenough]

The waiting is killing me...We're still not certified, we're waiting to be contacted for the homestudy...It's driving me NUTS!

Hang in there!

[shy_bear]

I am with you on the waiting. We have been told we will get a call within 3 weeks to set up our homevisit!! And we are just having an update done.

[WhoKnew]

I can not stress enough that once the homestudy is done, you should try, try, try to enjoy the relatively peaceful life you have now, before your life is turned upside down. It will be so much harder to make time forself once you children arrive. As wonderful as it is to have a new child or children, there will be a lot of stress involved. Pamper yourself now, while you can :~). Try to take a trip, by yourself, with your spouse/partner if applicable, or with friends. It will be so hard to do this later.

All that said, I know that the waiting is really, really hard. But it will be worth it!

[singlemommy]

Oh, these are good words to hear. I became impatient about a month ago. Now I'm just going crazy. I already made it throught the 'take time for yourself' phase and moved quickly into crazy stage. Hopefully nobody is monitoring how often I post here. I know in my heart that when I finally do get children placed with me that I'll be wishing for the free time I have now. Why can't our brains take over instead of our hearts!!!! This is such a difficult stage. Thank you so much to those that have made it past my point of craziness and can try to help keep us in touch with reality.

[WhoKnew]

Just curious what those of you who are waiting have 'requested'. Any gender prefences, what ages, single child or sib group?

Remember that these workers have huge case loads and lots of people to keep track of. It doesn't hurt to give them a periodic call or send a note expressing how eager you are, and maybe even reminding them of your criteria.

Hope you all do not have to wait much longer!

[singlemommy]

I'm looking for a sibling group of two, boy and girl, ages 1-8. Our state may be a little different. We have an adoption worker that makes the calls for foster/adopt children. The social workers don't even call us.

I did just find out that I am the only person waiting for a sibling group in our foster/adopt program. There are about 45 families in the program. That actually makes it even more surprising that I haven't got the right call yet.

[hopetoadoptblog]

My husband and I are waiting for a sibling group of 2 to 4, ages 0 to 9.

We really don't want an only child, as we were both from groups of 3 and 4 siblings ourselves.

However, we will NOT rule out an only child, it just depends upon what situation is presented to us at that time.

We had a REALLY good meeting with a group of 4 at an adoption party last month, it was a group of 4, ages 9 8 6 and 4.

However, we just got word last week that another family was selected for them. *sighs*

So, we're still waiting, too. I have my hands too full with taking care of my grandmother to think about anything else right now, so that helps with the waiting phase.

[dawnmei]

I've also grown tired of "taking time for myself" and am ready to take care of some kids! It's nice to know I'm not alone out there. I'm looking for a single girl or sibling group ages 5-9.

[pugmamma]

My husband and I are seeking a sibling group, 0-7 yrs. up to 4 children. Wr e are taking a vacation to Puerto Rico soon and I told hime, this could be our last adult only vacation. Hopefully!!!!:O)

[debbys]

I'm waiting for 2 sibs, ages 0-6 yrs, boys or girls, any race. I've had enough "me" time, also. I've taken the big vacations. I'm going crazy waiting, too. Laughed out loud at singlemommy's 3/22 post. Debby

[WhoKnew]

I absolutely understand the sentiment that you've had enough "me" time, and understand how incredibly eager you are to hve your child(ren). I felt the same way! But don't be surprised if later on you would give ANYTHING for some "me" time.

When you are so eager and excited to be matched, it really is hard to picture how significantly your life will change, and how incredibly difficult and challenging a new child with a traumatic history can be. In fact, nothing can really prepare you for the reality.

I know of three adoptive placements that have disrupted because the parents were not prepared for the challenges. I am not trying to discourage you, but it really helps to be as informed as possible going in. Definitely read up attachment. I like Parenting the Hurt Child and Attaching in Adoption. Love and Logic offers great techniques for dealing with behavior issues.

Adopting an older child is really, really challenging, but absolutely worth it! DD has brought so much joy to our family. I know your children are out there, and will be blessed to have loving parents like yourselves.

[singlemommy]

I think I may need professional help if I don't get a placement soon. I was excited last week when the adoption worker told me she was adding my name to two more regions. Still not a single call. All I do now is sit at the computer and alternate between reading new posts on the forum and checking my email. Even at work. I'm going to end up with OCD and no job.


I've got to figure out a way to get my mind of this. It doesn't help that I have hardly anything to do at work. Thanks to those that have been posting words of encouragement. I do read them. I just can't seem to live by the words.