[mcnh63]

Hello all.
I've been lurking on the boards for a few weeks now and finally decided to introduce myself.
My husband and I are just starting the process of Foster to adopt. We are looking to take in a fd 0-3 years of age. We are in Central (upstate) NY. So far on these boards I have not seen anyone else from NY.
We are very excited and hope that the process goes quickly but I'm hearing it can take quite a few months.
Like I said we just started the process. They have our application and told us that it would take 7-14 days for a background check. Then we are hoping to start our classes on Aug 2nd.
If there is anyone from Upstate NY that can shed some light on how long the process might take that would be great.
I have worked with Emotionally disturbed teen girls in a residential treatment center for 17 years so I'm hoping that that will look good for us. We don't have children of our own. We were married two years ago and we are both in our early 40's. My husband will be the one staying home with the baby. I'm hoping that will not be a problem either.
A little over a year ago we started the process to adopt from out of the country.( I used to spend some time on the boards back then) Due to some health problems that my husband had ( all fine now) we put that on hold. We have now decided that this may be a better way to go for us.
So far I have gotten some great info on here and I'm sure I'll be jumping into some conversations from time to time.
PS. I also posted this on another foster care board but this one seems to get more traffic.

[katie119]

We are just starting also. We start just in August. We are really excited but scared too. Our ultimate goal is adoption. I know the road will be a long haul but dh and I are up for the challenge. Denise

[jackiesbooks]

Check out the NY state boards for NY info.

[morandi7]

I'm in California, but just to give you an idea of timeframes, we started our classes in March, finished early May. You could concurrently collect all of the items you need to provide while you're taking your classes. We started some, but finished most after our classes. We also had to take CPR/First Aid, so that took another few weeks. The agency didn't start our homestudy until we were almost done with our classes. They just finished up the homestudy in early July.

So, really, it's up to you, how long it takes you to submit all of the required paperwork (in California there's quite a bit). Plus, then you have to add on how long your classes will take, including CPR/First Aid (if you need them), then add how long the homestudy will take. I would guess the homestudy to take 2 months minimum. Now, we are just waiting to be matched. That could take anywhere from 1 week to 6-12 months. It just depends. We're asking for the same age as you, plus we want a girl, which will probably make our wait even longer.

Bottom line, I would expect at least a 6 month process to be placed minimum from the point you start your requirements, classes, homestudy, etc.

Keep us updated!

[mcnh63]

Thanks folks
I have tried the NY board but there is absolutely no action over there.
I'm already CPR/First Aid certified. I get it every year at work. I'm assuming DH will have to take this though.
Our Classes are 11 weeks long. They said that we start our home study the 7th week. That could take 4-6 months they said. I'm hoping it does not take that long though. Thanks all... any info any of you have would be so helpful

[hesabanana]

My husband and I are first time foster parents. We have had our 17 month old foster son for 12 months. DSS is looking to begin overnight visits with his birth mother next month, and we are both completely devastated. Neither of us can imagine not being able to adopt him.
We both thought be were prepared for a negative outcome, but have found that for us, there is no way to prepare. I am a masters level social worker and my husband a special education teacher; we thought our professional experience would help us, and it has in terms of negotiating within the system, but not in terms of the emotional stress.
This has been the best and worst experience of our lives, and we do not plan to do it again. We are on a constant emotional roller coaster, and have not truly relaxed since our little guy came to live with us for fear that he may be leaving. I also struggle with a lot of ambivalence toward his birth mother as I have come to care a great deal for her, but truly believe she is not able to appropriately parent (she has a lengthy history of alcohol addiction and children in care). I would appreciate any readers' feedback who have been in similar situations. I don't know that anyone could have prepared me for this.

[missw005]

mcnh63,

I have a friend - juli714 - she and her dh are from NY. She's new too - and is really nice! PM her - she's great.

But you're right, the state boards are really slow - I don't have much luck on the MN state boards either.



hesabanana,

I've been where you are now. I had 4 year old b/g twins for a year - and everyone kept saying I'd be able to adopt them. Bmom had drug/alcohol issues, mental health issues, criminal issues, had lost custody of her other children.......and to make a looooooong story short, the day in court when she was to be TPRd and I was to be awarded legal custody until adoption.......all hell broke loose. At the last minute, bmom gave custody to her elderly mother so "SHE (meaning me) can't have my kids!" I was totally surprised and utterly devastated.

It dumped me into a dark hole I struggled to get out of for a long time. I swore I'd NEVER do foster care again.

Yeah.....well.......for my personal sanity, I switched from fos-adopt/legal risk to short-term/crisis/respite/emergency placements ONLY. The longest any child(ren) can be with me is 2 weeks. That's my limit.

And don't get me wrong. I think about the kids that live with us, even just for a weekend, all the time. Worry about them. But it's not the devastating heartbreak like before.

I'm so, so, so sorry you're going through this. I hope to God the judge makes the right decision and lets you keep your fs. My thoughts are with you. PM me anytime.



Sandy

[mcnh63]

Wow.. I will say that it is hard to hear those stories when we are so hoping for a good outcome.
We were called today and told that our first approval come through so now it is on to the classes and the home study.
Thank you mssw005- nice to know there is someone from NY state on here. I will pm her.

[leaabc123]

I am also in Central NY. We have been certified for the past 3 years and have had a few long term placements. One that we thought would head to adoption but did not.
We are currently waiting to see where our girls' case goes before getting our hopes up.

Once your classes are done. it will be up to your worker to complete your homestudy and then you should be certified.
We were actually certified about a month before we got the license in the mail. After that it was about 3 months before we got a placement.

If your age range remains below 3, you may have a long wait especially if you won't be taking more than 1. Usually, they need placements for sibling groups but you never know.

[mcnh63]

Leaabc123-
We are going through onondaga County but madison county said we should be able to sign up with them also after the home study etc. is done and we are certified.
I talked to some CW's there that said they do have babies but yes it is quicker with sibling groups.
We are hoping it won't take too long since they gave us so much hope that it would not be. We'll see.
I'm hoping since I know some of the caseworkers that it will help us. Who knows.
we start our classes on Aug 1st and after the 7th week they are going to sign us up with a case worker to do the home study. She said it should be 4 months from then that we will have the home study completed. She told me that it was only taking about two months for a while but since they are getting more people from all the recruiting they are doing it is taking longer again. We can only hope and wish

P.S.Since you are in the area- have you heard of the Family Support Center at Elmcrest?

[DOUGTONYA]

I'm From The Mohvae County In Arizona Me And My Husband Are Starting The Process Of Foster Adopt, We Are So Excited And Are Just Waiting For Everything To Start, I Have A 13 Year Old Son, And My Husband Adopted Him 2 Years Ago. We Had To Have A Homestudy And Back Round Check All Those Things, But What Can I Expect From The Foster Adopt Homestudy Is It Different, I Have Questions Like Do I Need Outlet Covers On So That They Know That I'm Ready, Anyone Have Some Advice, We Are Looking For A New Baby And One Maybe Under 2 If I Could I Would Really Want A Girl Who Is Newborn Or A Couple Months. Can It Happen I Really Hope So Please Someone Help Me Out, I Have So Many Questions. Tonya

[jen1mac]

Our daughter came into our home at 2 weeks old about 7 months after we had finished all our paperwork and homestudy. She was not legally free and we did not officially adopt her until she was 16 months old. In the foster care system I don't think a newborn is ever legally free and it usually takes atleast a year for that to happen. You have to be willing to be patient and persistant. I called a lot in that 7 months asking about kids and also called a lot after we got our daughter to keep pushing things along. Let me know if you have any question either by PM or by posts.

[mcnh63]

We are now almost done with our home study and have completed our MAPP classes.( we are doing foster to adopt)
So far things are going along well.
We have been told many times and have met people that tell us that you can get that call minutes after you sign your papers or you could have to wait months. Much of this depends on what you are willing to take into your home.Then the usual time until you can adopt runs around 2 years usually. Depends on the child's situation and the courts. You may have a judge that will give the bio parents very few chances or you could get a judge that gives them many chances.You just never know.
We ourselves know that this is going to be a long and sometimes rough road but we are in this for the long haul.
I have talked to people who have said that this was the most challenging experience of their lives but also the most rewarding.
Good luck to everyone.

[Howdy]

I hope you get a quick placement. I have a child (9 yrs old) whose adoption will be finalized in a couple weeks. Then we plan to start waiting for a second child. I hope we get the perfect kid and really fast, but from 3 yrs experience I know we might have to wait a while, then maybe have to let one or two go. I just hope I don't get a seriously disturbed child, that is my fear. But all of the first three placements have been wonderful kids (if you don't mind neediness and defiance).

[Brookiebear]

I am in Oklahoma and we are going through the Bair Foundation to be certified as therapeutic foster parents. Our training started on August 6th and we began turning in our homestudy paperwork during training. We have now finished training and we will have the final home visist for our homestudy this afternoon. Our advisor, who is also the woman doing our homestudy, says that we are on track to be certified by the end of October and could reasonably expect our first placement in November. We are open to adoption, but we are not specifically foster/adopt, so we are pretty open to children of different ages/races/backgrounds/behaviors. So, for us, the process has moved pretty quickly. I think that if we wanted a more specific age-range, it might take longer to actually have a child placed. Best of luck to everyone just starting out! Let's keep posting as we move through the process!
~B