[ShellyandRon]

Hello, I'm just starting the process of adopting through foster care. I just filled out the background check form, financial report, expenses itemization sheet, and the application to operate a foster home. I'm suppose to start my home study and parenting classes next month.
Here's my questions. How long does it take for a person to get cleared for the go ahead to adopt after you turn in the paper work? Does it take longer to adopt through another state? When you finish your home study and parenting classes, how long does it take for placement?
My husband and I went through some tough life issues last year. We were hoping to adopt a newborn but the mother backed out at the moment. We bought everything. Our family was so excited and bought a million things as well. Everyone was devastated. The whole family knows about what we are trying to do once again. We are all hopeful and are hearts are hanging on a line it seems. Is this really the easiest way to go to adopt through foster care?
I'd love some fed back and any help anyone could give me. Thank you for listening.

[tlc4kidz]

I wouldn't say it's easy by any means. I would never want to scare someone off, but in all reality, it's hard. If you are only taking a placement that's legally free for adoption you should be prepared that you likely won't be placed with a newborn. If you are willing to accept legal risk placements then you have to be able to support reunification with birthparents, or placement with older sibs (if there are any) or other relatives, which sometimes don't come out of the woodwork for months.

I REALLY don't want to sound pessimistic (and if you have read many of my posts I think you would see I'm not), but I think anyone going into foster to adopt should be warned. I also will tell you that we have 2 of the most beautiful children on earth forever and ever because of the decision we made to foster, so it can happen. We also fostered 7 other children prior to their adoption.

Advice....either take only legally free and possibly wait a while or risk a heartbreak and know that you've touched the life of a child along the way. Just my 2 cents!

[robbieswife]

I will also tell you that it is not easy by any means. You definitely need to be ready for kids to go home unless they are legally free before you get them. I have heard of stories where it looks like there is no way that the child will end up home and then that is exactly what happens. We adopted our little girl through the system. We got her when she was 1 month old and did work very closely with the birth mom to help her to reunify. After 7 months, the bmom realized that she was not going to be able to keep her safe and voluntarily surrendered. This is quite the exception!! The goal for foster care is always reunification and if you are unable to do it with that in mind, I would highly suggest that you don't do it. We have been waiting over a year for another placement and have just decided to go private after talking with several social workers at our county. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but it is better to go into foster care knowing the truth.

Robbieswife

[hubbyswife]

Yeah, I agree w them, that it is hard to be foster parents. We r new at it. We still have our 1st placement. We r hoping to adopt him but unfortunately relatives have come fwd so we r waiting to find out if he'll b moving. We also had a 15 mths girl, I had my guard knowing that she was temporary well mom/dad were charged so I was hoping and in the 2wks we had I was attached.... well they called one even and said we're moving her tomorrow.... It was hard saying bye and all... she moved to another country too!! So, that was that. There are no guarantee's that u will adopt or not. I think it's tough being a fp but we plan to be fp until we find our forever child and then will probably do it again once they have grown up....

Good Luck!

[leaabc123]

It is definitely not easy. You will almost never get a newborn who is legally free for adoption right away. Usually, a family member will step forward and be immediately approved.

Our 2nd placement was a 4 month old boy who stayed until he was 11 months old. In the beginning, none of the relatives wanted custody, then all of a sudden, one of them changd their minds and won custody after having had no contact for more than 5 months. Everyone was predicting that he would end up staying with us.

That was back in feb. We took a few months before accepting placements again. We just got an emergency placement of 2 siblings (ages 1 and 2 1/2) and are cautiously waiting to see what happens.

As far as how long it takes, it depends and can vary. It depends on what ages you are willing to take, wht races, and issues as well.
There may be a ton of people in your area waiting for newborns or there may be only a few.

Also, (not wanting to be pessimistic either) some families know the system and know how much time they have to step forward and it is not unheard of for family members to wait until babies are sleeping through the night, or even potty trained before stepping forward.

You may likely get your heart broken many times before you get to adopt or it could happen right away.

[melindam2]

I feel very lucky with my experiance. I completed my foster and adoption studies in about three months, and became licensed. For some reason I never was called for foster care, and about 7 months after being licensed I was called that I was matched with a 3 month old healthy baby boy! This was last May, and he came to live with me in July. He was not free and clear at that time, but it was a very low probability that he would not be able to be adopted. I have had him ever since, and the court date for the final adoption is next week.

I live in San Jose, Calif. Maybe my experiance was unusual, but for me this was an extremely easy way to adopt.