[jbdrichey]

We are just in the beginning stages of thinking about adopting a child in the foster care system. We currently have a 8yr son who is autistic (high functioning) and we are thinking of expanding our family.

I did not have a positive birth experience with my ds so I don't really want to be pregnant again. My dh and ds doesn't really want a baby, I wouldn't mind having another baby as long as I do not give birth to it.

Ideally we would like a child age 0-7 since I would want a child younger than my bs. Dh and I have just started talking about adoption (we thought it would cost way to much $) so I am starting to research about foster to adopt to learn more about things before we take this huge step.

I am sure family and friends will be saying to me "Why don't you just have another of your own?" I can't explain it but for the past 6 mos I have been thinking about adoption of a older child. Just want to know what we are getting into first though.

Anyways, I just wanted to intoduce myself.

[JadedSaint]

Welcome Brandy! I'm fairly new to these boards as well. My Dh (also named Jeff and 32!) and I are deciding to adopt an older child through the foster care system as well. We have been through the orientation and initial interview. We are signed up for our parenting PRIDE classes and they begin on April 20th. Our family is very supportive of our decision. Of course you'll encounter those who will have a smart-alecky remark of why not having another bio-child, but all you have to do is smile back at them and tell them that this is your and your DH's decision, and leave it at that! You are not required to give a song and dance explanation. Good luck to you!

[jbdrichey]

Jaded, we are not quite at the point that we want to start paperwork. We can not decide whether to try having another bio child or adopt. There are so many pluses and minuses to both options.

I do feel that we will make this decision within the next 6 mos. We tried to conceive for a year before and was not successful so it might not be an option to have another bio child anyway. Then there is a 7% chance that we would have another child on the autism spectrum, which would be ok if it was high functioning like my son but I don't know if I can handle a non verbal.

Good luck to you and I hope you find your child quickly. What age range are you looking in?

[bumpkin]

JBD = Good luck in making your decision. My dh and I have an adopted son who is now 8, we are in the middle of our MAPP classes and then will move on towards adoption through our state. Only you two can decide if this is the route that is in your plan to expand your family. One thing to consider is that going through the state social service system can take some time, you have many opportunities to stop if you want, they are very good at letting people stop if they are uncomfortable and start back up later, part of the classes that you have to take is to address whether you are 'up" for the task, if you will. You might want to start the ball rolling and explore this avenue further... if nothing else it may help you to decide, and you won't feel like you have lost any time if you do move forward.

Best of luck and ask any questions you need to.

Bumpkin

[JadedSaint]

Good luck to you and I hope you find your child quickly. What age range are you looking in?

Thank you! We have a target range of 4-7, but our hearts and home is open to any child under age 10, and possibly a sibling group of 2 children.

We're still in the beginning stages of the process, so we don't anticipate to become parents for at least another year to year and a half. In the meantime, we're using the time to educate ourselves, our familes, and get excited about the thought of becoming parents! Good luck to you in whatever decision you and your DH make!

[jbdrichey]

Bumpkin, I was thinking about doing that. I told my DH today maybe we could TTC and do the adoption route and see what happens first.

Do you know if you have to go through the county you live in? For example the county beside us is advertising (and does frequently) for foster parents and it is a bigger county so I thought we might have better chances through them.

Thanks for the welcome and I hope to chat with you all as we make this decision.