[jjjetplane2]

Hi All!

Nice to be able to communicate with others and their experiences.

We have only taken in one foster child and adopted 3 years later. He is now 5 and we took in a second 3 yr old foster child. We were originally told we may be able to adopt, and they tell us it is still a possibility. But it is seeming that she will eventually be going. We all adore this wonderful girl.

My son is full of ?'s.
How long will she be staying? When is the police man going to come pick her up? I want her to stay forever, or if angry I want her to go now.

How do you handle these ?'s.

I try to say it is our job to have a safe and loving home, until the judge decides, but no need to worry about it, it is all good and all part of God's plan. He asked me if the judge is God. No, I try to change the subject.

She has also started saying when upset she would like to live somewhere else. I can see this hurts his feelings. Yet, he does not verbalize his feelings he acts out instead.

I can see the lack of permanency is effecting both children. (& me with worry) I worry how this is going to effect our attachment issues healing son?

How does taking in foster child effect your children? Especially foster/adopted. My son's bio Mom Terminated her parental rights, just before the county did. He is an only child, up until now.

Help?

[hockeycoachmomo]

Hi! I would suggest that you take your son for some counseling. I can see how having a foster child who will probably leave would have a negative effect on a child who has gone through foster care, himself. Even though he was only 2 when you got him, the lack of permancy with your fdaughter is bringing back some memories and feelings that he is having trouble handling.

I think that with some counseling, you shouldn't have to give up the foster care. I would think that it would be something that would be fairly easy to work out with some help.

Let us know what happens.