[Magic_Moon]

Hi. I am a female approaching forty and in another year, I will graduate college with a degree in elementary education. I would like to adopt a child (possibly from outside the U.S.) but I have heard that Florida forbids gays and lesbians from adopting. Right now I do not have a partner. Does anyone know what the procedures are for single-parent adoptions in Florida? Also- if I apply to adopt and do not state my sexual preference, do the adoption agencies continuously check up on parents throughout a child's life with their adoptive families? I know that Rosie O'Donnell has attempted to adopt here in Florida and was unable to continue the process. I wondered if I was able to remain "closeted" about my life whether I could possibly adopt. I live a very conservative life but also hope to someday settle down with a partner. Does anyone know some way around this issue where I could also adopt a child? I know I would be a good parent because I was raised by the best parents a person could have.

Anyone's help, support, and advice would be greatly appreciated.

[roxanna425]

I don't know about international adoptions but if you state forbids adoptions for gays/lesbians it means form within the state system. They cannot keep you fomr going internationally or to adopting form another state. YOu should go see an adoption lawyer in your state to see what your options are. Pref. one that specializes in gay/lesb adoptions.

[paperchasingmom]

from what I've personally seen, this can stop you from adopting even internationally since your homestudy would be done within the state of Florida, if that's where you reside, which I presume is the case since this is where you are posting your question....

For you see, in order for you to have an approved homestudy, even for international, it has to state that you have met all of Florida's adoption requirements which means you fill out a state of Florida questionnaire/application for adoption which specifically asks the question regarding your sexuality...this form is necessary for all adoptions, even international....it allows the social worker to show that you have met all of Florida's "pre-adoptive requirements"...because if you don't pass that, you can't even adopt internationally...the first approval then lets you move forward to the next approval, so on and so on...

and if you lie, and check another box regarding that question specifically, just to "pass" the state of Florida pre-adoptive requirements which is necessary to give you a correct, completed, approved homestudy, then your adoption, even after it's final, can be revoked due to this fraud, unfortunately....

Again, check with an attorney though or an agency, they can confirm this for you, if they're knowledgeable enough...

I really would not encourage you to try to go this method because you would feel like this black cloud of not being truthful was continually following you, I would think....If I were you and I did that, I would hate to have to go through the rest of my life wondering, worrying, scared about my adoption and my child, should this information ever really come to light....plus I'm sure you want to live your life normally and not have to hide even maybe years and years later...

You could, however, investigate more just how Rosie did complete her adoptions...although I believe they were all domestic and through another state, somehow...then you could adopt and NOT WORRY, do you know what I mean????

It's worth having the peace of mind...

Blessings,

Melody

[Magic_Moon]

Thanks for your responses. I think that if Rosie had a very hard time and was not able to adopt in this state with all the money she has, I know I would never be able to (on a teacher's salary). But within the next couple of years (after I graduate) I will visit an attorney and check my options anyway. Thanks again.

[rbvb]

I adopted as a single person in FL and they did ask me several questions regarding my sexual pref. they also asked neighbors and friends and employers. I am not gay and I really have no opinion in whether gays should adopt or not but I would caution against lying. If it was to ever come out after the adoption was final, the state would take the child back into custody and that wouldn't be fair to the child to love and trust you and for you to put him/her at that kind of risk. Unfortunately if you really want to adopt, you would be better off going to another state to do it. I think FL is the only state that doesn't allow gays to adopt.