[redbonec]

So yesterday I was talking to my friend who has three children. I told her how I keep having to really think about babyproofing every day now, as K gets to more places. Dangerous things are put out of reach, some things I don't want K to touch (such as pulling our books off shelves--not doing so yet, but will be soon!), and other things I don't want her to play with even though they are protected (outlet coverings) but they are still withing reach and can't do anything about that. But I don't want to say "no" all day.

So, my friend said for things that were dangerous she would use the word "hot!" or "danger!" and move the child away. If it was a personal item she didn't want her child touching, she would say "pretty" and move their hand. That way, when she wanted to use the word "no" it hadn't already been heard 50 other times that day, and she didn't have to say "no" constantly.

I started thinking of words to use. Have you come up with any that you use that is other than "no?"

[ManyTimesBlessed]

I have a friend who says "stop" instead of no. She says a child can stop something, but they can't "no" something. Maybe she has a point?

I try to say "no thank you" or "no sir" to Jayden instead of just saying "no". I figure at least it is reinforcing the way that I want him to use the word no.

I'm curious what others will say, though.

[OnTheJourney]

We have been thinking about this as well. DS is starting to get a little mischevious and into things. Some is even cute now but soon..... not so cute! I don't want to be no-noing all day but I'm starting to find myself saying it. I want to get in the habit of using other words before it is too hard to break.

One that our friends used with their kiddos was to say "aahhh" or "danger" and put a hand out (like stop) in the direction of the object. ie: stove, plant, electronics, fire pit camping. I'm not big on the 'aahhh' sound, but the hand is a good idea, either way it worked very well for them! Remember, they become copy cats though! Picture a 2 and a 3.5 year old walking in a busy mall and when they see the escalator, stopping, putting out their hands and yelling "aahhhhhhhh"! LOL

-M

[blessedbybug]

Our word is "tata". Bug knows to stop whatever she is doing when she hears me say "tata". Roo is learning VERY slowly. It's good because it can be said softly or with some force.

[HBV]

Mostly I try to tell him what I want him to do instead: We sit down on our bottom in the bath tub.
We pet the dogs gently.
We color only on the paper.
We put the food in our mouth. (As opposed to our hair, Mommy's hair, the high chair seat, in the dog's mouth.)

For the more urgent communications:

We say "Wait, wait, wait!" to stop him from going up the stairs alone or walking out into a parking lot. It's worked. Now he says it, too, and has started to sit down on the bottom step to wait for one of us.

We say HOT!, Gentle, STOP!, Breakable, Dangerous! and... probably far more than we should....OH, I DON'T THINK SO!

[ddhuab]

I also use "hot" when she reaches for elect. outlets or oven door. I use "dangerous" sometimes when she heads toward a plastic bag, or some other thing. And we use "gentle/gently" for petting the dog,as opposed to hitting her, pulling her ears, and poking her in the eye (our poor dog).

Sometimes I still use "no" or "no ma'am."

We are teaching her baby signing, so I also just wag my finger at her sometimes. (this is sometimes accompanied by "no").

For crawling/walking away/ahead (she just started walking), I usually say "stay with Mommy," and go grab her, or "come back to Mommy," if we are in the house.

I love the above idea about saying what you should be doing. My current method of 'discipline' is remove/distract and substitute, so that would work along well with that.

Good luck, I am with you with the not wanting to say "no" all day (and cringe at teh thought of her yelling "no" at me, haha).

-D.

[redbonec]

Thanks for some suggestions to think about. I find that sometimes, I know what I don't want to do (say "no" all day), but it can be hard to think of what to do instead!

HBV--funny about the last line! What positive action did you say when he was going for a plant?

Those are all good ideas from everyone. My first reaction is to say "no" because it is quick and I don't have to think about it! Glad to have some other things to think about.

I need to remember to do my signs with these, although we are just starting.

Ddhuab--I also don't want K telling me "no" from hearing it so much too!

[mommamarci]

I do use no, but not a lot. I tend to say, "We don't do..." When he pulls my hair or the dog's, I say, "Cameron, be nice." And then make him give me kisses for pulling my hair. (Any excuse to steal a kiss!)

Cameorn has learned to shake his head no! It is so darn cute! He has not quite gotten it figured out. He will do it when he is full at dinner, but sometimes he does it as he is opening his mouth as well. I think he got a reaction the first few times (when he was doing it correctly) so now he wants to do it all the time!

[HBV]

He has only gone after plants outside---the neighbor's flowers---so I said dorky things like:
Yes, the flower's pretty! Let's smell it.
Is that a leaf? Let's touch it gently so we won't hurt the plant.

Next thing you know I will be telling my assistant: "We say thank you to the nice client!" , "Bring the files to Mommy, please."

[dawnrenee58]

When my son is going for something that will hurt him, I say "Owie, owie, owie" in a panic type voice. It helps him understand that the reason I don't want him to touch whatever is because he will get an owie, and what kid wants that! He seems to find the only outlet in the entire house without a cover and just guns for it. Also, right now, height is cool, so he is always climbing as high as he can. Amazing how quickly he can get from the floor to standing on the back of the couch!!