[Sydangle2]

We were matched w/ a bmom 7-15 we visited her; we thought we connected w/ her ... we were planning a semi-open to open adoption. She referred to us on many occasions as the babies parents, She wanted us at the hospital w/ her & that is what happened we held our baby girl moments after her birth on 8-04-09 at 5:40am she was born at 35weeks. Placed in an incubator. We sat by our baby girls bedside for 2 days, we held her, comforted her, she was our baby girl our daughter we could finally think about the future w/ a tiny little baby in it; we imagined what holidays would be like w/ a baby girl. We were parents; as stated by everyone the nursery, bmom , & bmom's mom We knew this was going to happen. Then as we were getting ready to return to the hospital the phone rings we hear a sobbing voice.... 'I can't do it...I can't do it, I'm sorry... the adoption is off I'm sorry. ' Our entire world changed in an instant.

And just like that it's over. I've dreamed of our baby girl every night since 8-6-09 when we received that phone call when our life changed forever yet again. We're just soooo tired of the heartache & tears. We really thought this time it was 'our turn'. That after 7 years / 4 mc's - we would finally be a family. Guess we were wrong again. I just miss our baby girl... I miss the life we could have had... & I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooo tired of having these dreams of what should have been.

[tanmansmom]

I'm so sorry this happened. I'm sure you have heard it before, but your baby will find you. Adoption is such a difficult road for everyone. The grief you are feeling is normal; that doesn't make it any easier. You experienced a loss and you will need time to recover. I wish you peace.

[hpfreak080]

i wish there was something I could do/say to just make things right for you. Before I came along, my parents went through a failed match (it was a blonde-haired blue-eyed boy--my mom's DREAM). After taking some time to deal with their grief, my parents accepted the next match for them and that is how I joined the family (I'm my mom's brown-eyed girl--you know, like the song lol).

I know it is hard to think about now and it is very cliche but the right child for you WILL come. I was adopted after my parents' failed match and our family is strong and all of us are happy and close. 'Your turn' will come, just give it time.

Again, I'm sorry you are hurting so much (I can't even imagine the pain) and I wish there was something more I could say.

I send you my prayers and (((hugs)))

[DancinBear63]

I'm sorry that you and your husband are experiencing this. I hope good things come your way really soon!