[mom2samuel]

Hi. I don't know who remembers me, but we had two failed adoptions this past spring. Both were very devastating to us. Well, Nov. 10th we got another call. An agency had contacted our agency with a birthmom due Nov 15. We went forward, the other agency telling us how firm she was in her decision, etc. We were on the edge of our nerves all week. Baby was born early Nov 18. We were given information yesterday, then got an update this morning after church. Again, mom was firm in her decision, dad was supportive, though he wasn't going to sign TPR. Within hours we got another call saying mom had received many visitors, and in the meantime had told the hospital social worker she now wanted a local family, she didn't want her baby to go out of state (we are in the next state, only 3 hours away, and this from a mom who had said that she wanted no contact after placement). I don't know who, but someone obviously had a lot of influence on her decision.

We are, again, just devastated. We were being VERY cautious, yet here we were, ready to leave tomorrow or Tues morning, and everyone was saying how "solid" she was. We feel duped! Why does this keep happening to us!?! I think it is even harder, what with the holidays coming. I was so optimistic that this was "It".

Thanks for letting me vent.

Michelle

[KarynB]

Michelle,

You have certainly earned the right to vent!! I am so sorry this happened to you - it must be just heartbreaking.

Thoughts are with you and your dh....

[kelceesmom]

Michelle, I am sorry for what has happened to your family. I'm sure the feelings are just overwhelming right now. When, not "if" the baby that is meant to be with your forever comes into your life you instantly know this is why we had to wait. It is so hard to believe that until it happens. We had a failed match and brought home identical twins for a week before the bmom decided to parent. Our hearts were crushed until our baby came home for good this time. Your family will be in our prayers. It is probably harder right now since we are so close to the holidays. Take care of yourself and can't wait to see your post of your new arrival.

[SadMomma]

Originally Posted by mom2samuel

Hi. I don't know who remembers me, but we had two failed adoptions this past spring. Both were very devastating to us. Well, Nov. 10th we got another call. An agency had contacted our agency with a birthmom due Nov 15. We went forward, the other agency telling us how firm she was in her decision, etc. We were on the edge of our nerves all week. Baby was born early Nov 18. We were given information yesterday, then got an update this morning after church. Again, mom was firm in her decision, dad was supportive, though he wasn't going to sign TPR. Within hours we got another call saying mom had received many visitors, and in the meantime had told the hospital social worker she now wanted a local family, she didn't want her baby to go out of state (we are in the next state, only 3 hours away, and this from a mom who had said that she wanted no contact after placement). I don't know who, but someone obviously had a lot of influence on her decision.

We are, again, just devastated. We were being VERY cautious, yet here we were, ready to leave tomorrow or Tues morning, and everyone was saying how "solid" she was. We feel duped! Why does this keep happening to us!?! I think it is even harder, what with the holidays coming. I was so optimistic that this was "It".

Thanks for letting me vent.

Michelle

Michelle my heart goes out to you. I just went through my 2nd failed adoption October 19th (I had my child for 4 months). As the holiday approaches i am just so Sad. It seems like everything has to do with children. Lets hold each other up in prayer. This support group is helping me and I hope I can help you too.

[Jaefer]

Mom2Samuel -

My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. I know that it must be EXTREMELY excruciating right now. God does have a child for you, just keep the faith. Please keep us updated on your situation.

Jaefer

[Kat-L]

Originally Posted by SadMomma

Michelle my heart goes out to you. I just went through my 2nd failed adoption October 19th (I had my child for 4 months). As the holiday approaches i am just so Sad. It seems like everything has to do with children. Lets hold each other up in prayer. This support group is helping me and I hope I can help you too.

I can understand having a law in place allowing a birthmother to change her mind within a designated amount of time. Maybe 72 hours. Two weeks tops. I don't understand how a birthfamily can have 4 months! Allowing a new family to bond and then ripping it apart-that's definately NOT in the best interest of the child.

I'm so sorry for you and your loss.

[SadMomma]

Originally Posted by Kat-L

I can understand having a law in place allowing a birthmother to change her mind within a designated amount of time. Maybe 72 hours. Two weeks tops. I don't understand how a birthfamily can have 4 months! Allowing a new family to bond and then ripping it apart-that's definately NOT in the best interest of the child.

I'm so sorry for you and your loss.

I will never understand it either. I miss him so much and know he is not getting the "Love" our family gave him. And that is not to say his Biological family doesn't love him. But I mean we gave up going out, trips, cut-back on work just to spend time in his presence you know. So he will no without a doubt Mommy and Daddy loves him. We held him from the time he came home until he left us. We just got a swing a few weeks before we took him back because he stayed in our arms. There was no sitting down or crib for him!!!

[Linny]

I'm sorry you are going through this. Only today our family has dealt with a situation that appears may be going 'south'; and while I swore that I wouldn't get emotionally involved with this, I broke my own word, I guess.

I agree though....and we're living proof, that when the right baby comes into your life and is meant to be......that child will BE yours. I know this is hard to see now; and truthfully, at this point in the day--now---it's hard for me to swallow too.
But, I know from the baby that sits on my lap this minute, that the right baby comes into the right home...at the right time.
Hang in there and don't give up hope. Stay strong....

Most Sincerely,

Linny