[Hallemom]

Hello;

I am a single adoptive mom to a four year old from Chian and an 18 month old from Guatemala. I have become interested in adopting an older girl from Ethiopia, but have been warned by more than one source that school aged girls from Ethiopia have the highest disruption rate.

Has any heard or experienced this? Where might I get more information about this "trend."?

Hallemom

[JenC]

Hmmm, I wonder just who exactly these sources are. Not that I have any proof, but I think it's bull. Any child can have attachment issues - young, older, boy, girl, domestic, international. What's odd is I've always heard Ethiopia has a low disruption rate due to RAD/attachment problems. Not that I know if that's true or not, just throwing another thing out there.

I'll PM you a few blogs. Also, Yahoo has some Ethiopia Adoption groups that would be worth joining and reading through.

[ocracoke]

I would agree with Jen here. I had not heard that at all. I adopted my daughter from Ethiopia and she arrived home at 21months. My next adoption (with any luck) will be from Ethiopia and I would consider a girl in the age range of 4-7. I know several moms who have adopted older girls and boys and none have disrupted. Of course adopting at that age comes with it's special challenges but I don't think it is country specific. Consider joinging some of the yahoo groups for Ethiopian adoption and talk to those who have been there, done that. Don't worry so much on statistics -- get cases.

Best of luck,
Samantha

[kerriv]

Like the others, I haven't heard that statistic. It was definitely scarier for me bringing home an older child, worrying about all the negatives, but my 6 year old daughter is doing great - better than I ever dreamed. She's now been home 2 months. Older kids come with different challenges than younger ones - some pros and some cons for both age groups - but for us it has been great. You can check out my blog (listed below) to read more about our family.

[Petsitter]

I think that the key here is to be prepared! I agree that any age/sex child can be a part of a disruption. You need to be sure that you have realistic expectations and that you over prepare. During our first adoption, people used to laugh at me, because I worried about every little "what if". But, I felt better being prepared for any situation. If I had the knowledge and didn't need it, no biggie. If I needed the knowledge and didn't have it.. well there is where the trouble begins. I have honestly seen people disrupt for every possible reason, and some for no reason at all. If you do your research and make sure you are fully prepared, you are giving yourself and your new child the best possible advantage. Wishing you all the best!

[Ladyofmoonlight]

I have heard (can't recall the source, it was awhile ago) that the highest disruption rate from Ethiopia was older girls, but older as in 12-14 years, where they're pretty much adults over there and are becoming children again over here.