[mrsmommyx6]

I have a burden on my heart for adoption. I have been looking at many of the countries, but I feel like Ethiopia may be our best choice(mostly due to age/family restictions).

I want to hear about your expereinces with Ethiopian adoptions. Please tell me the good things, the bad things, what to expect, etc.

[ocracoke]

What is it you would like to know? If you look at my signature you can see my time line. However, that does not explain the story of my adoption. I knew right away that Ethiopia was the country for me. My adoption took about 11 months from start to finish. I had a positive experience with my agency. My travel was difficult. My daughter has been home since September 4th and she is the love of my life. We have shared bronchitis, ringworm, and scabies since her arrival. She is cute, smart, energetic (that is the positive way of saying it LOL), and so eager. I can't remember my life without her -- that may be the sleep deprivation though. Let me know what questions you have.

Samantha

[JuliaS]

Hi Samantha,
I'm trying to learn more about the background of the children available for adoption. Do you know anything about how the children come to be in the orphanage? I hear that it's "because of war" but that leaves a lot of question. Is AIDS a factor? Rape of mother? Death of parents? Poverty? Also, do you know anything about the conditions in the orphanages themselves? It sounds like the medical care might not be so great, but what about the emotional side?

I know this is a biggie. I appreciate any info you feel up to providing. (P.S. How old was your daughter when you adopted?)

[ocracoke]

All of the factors you mentioned can contribute to why a child is brought into an orphanage. Some children are relinquished while others are abandoned. My daughter was relinquished by her father, who was dying, the day after her mother died.

When looking at the orphanages you need to keep in mind that you are dealing with a third world country. The medical care and the conditions of the orphanages are good considering that. Do they have access to western medicine and amenities? No. But my daughter was seen by the orphanage doctor several times and treated for things like ringworm and giardia. The nannies LOVE LOVE LOVE the children and they get a lot of attention. I think that most orphanages have a good nanny to child ratio which helps the children bond to their new families.

My daughter was 18 months at referral and 10 months when she came home. I asked for a girl under 2 years but let them know that I would prefer over 1 year. It took about 3 days for her to determine that I was mama and we have had an easy transition in terms of bonding.

Samantha

[teranga]

I just want to second what Samantha said. Another reason many infants are relinquished is that the mother is a prostitute. We were told by several people that this is a common reason to relinquish infants--you have to remember that Ethiopia is extremely poor, and for many women, this is the only way they can support themselves and many times, their entire families. It is not viewed the same way there as here--the necessity for survival is understood, and there is not the disdain for it there. I was told that one of the local politicians in Addis was openly a former prostitute and that wasn't an issue which affected her popularity.

Our son was 8 months when he came home and had no adjustment issues at all.

There is very careful HIV testing (there has never been a child there who has tested negative and then tested positive in the US). The kids who are not really strong die--that is the reality. There is lots of love in the orphanage, and the children there generally do extremely well with their new families. Adjustment issues seem to be a lot lower there than in other countries where the institutinalization is longer and less personal.