[spooky06]

Do most people travel to pick up their child/children? Is using the escort frowned upon?

[teranga]

I don't know the stats of escorting vs. traveling, but I've known people who have done both, and I certainly don't think either option is frowned upon. People realize everyone's circumstances are different, and if you decide to escort b/c of cost, or b/c of time required, or b/c you're afraid to fly or anything else...others will respect that.

The primary reason I traveled was to see if I could find anything about the birthmother. I figured it would be a lot more difficult to find out from thousands of miles away, and certainly more difficult to find out 15 or 18 years from now. For me, that was key. But my reasons for traveling aren't the same as the next person's.

Do whatever you think is best for you and your family. I really don't think you'll find anyone criticizing you for it!

Teranga

[spooky06]

Thanks!

Anyone out there who has used the escort, what was your experience like overall?

[bluedaisy]

I know of at least one agency that requires you to travel if you are adopting a child over age 12 months.

Escorting can also add time, because there's additional processing of the CIS paperwork. I always encourage people to travel. Some people have happily escorted.

However, I don't know anyone who regrets traveling, but I do know a few folks who regret escorting and wish they have travelled.

[marista99]

Personally unless there was a very poor security situation over there (which is unfortunately often the case in Africa) that would make it unsafe, I can't imagine not travelling. If I were adopting from Liberia I would not travel because it is too dangerous over there, but I think Ethiopia right now at least is relatively safe. Plus, it is important to me to see where my child came from, where she has been living, what the culture is like firsthand. And while it would be difficult doing that trans-atlantic plane trip with a small child, I would prefer to be the one on that plane ride (almost definitely her first one--and probably quite scary for her) with her rather than a stranger.

On the other hand, I know a couple who adopted (from Korea) and elected not to travel because they had a young child at home and the husband could not get time off from work. So depending on your circumstances it might not work out--but if there's any way you can swing it, I'd say go for the trip!!

(btw, I have never done this and am by no means an international adoption expert; this is just what I think I would do in my situation :-)

[JuliaS]

Teranga,
Were you able to find out anything about the birth mother? That's something I would like to do as well if I go this route!

Thanks.

[ocracoke]

I travelled and now I would easily say that I don't regret it. I did not want to add the extra time on to my process by using escort. But I will also say that in the midst of traveling home on a 17 hour flight with a toddler who looked at me as a stranger (both of us sick with bronchitis and she had a double ear infection) I was wishing that I had escorted. traveling home was not easy or fun. There are definite values of traveling but each family must make the decision themselves.

Samantha

[spooky06]

Who does the escorting - an employee of the agency? It is my understanding that only one agency allows escorting. Is that true?