[irelady10]

I have an 17 month old AS (who was exposed to cocaine, nicotine, and alcohol) who is having sleep issues. He has never been a good night sleeper- lots of nightime waking. He didn't sleep through the night until about 14 months. I do all the things you are supposed to do to facilitate good sleep habits: his nap is 2 hours, he goes to sleep between 7:30-8:00, I follow a nightime routine, I put him to bed while he is awake and he soothes himself to sleep, I do not answer to his every whimper in the middle of the night. He typically "sleeps" from 7:30 pm-6 am.

Anyway, his current issue is waking in the middle of the night and being awake for about 1-2 hours. He does not cry- just grunts, groans, whimpers, or sings and talks to himself. This usually happens about 6 hours after he goes to sleep. I don't go to him- but, we sleep (out of necessity) in the same room and I'm ending up getting only about 4 hours of sleep a night and this is KILLING me, not to mention the baby is not getting the rest he should.

Does anyone have any ideas what could be going on? Are his sleep issues from being exposed to drugs/alcohol? If they are, will he outgrow this or will his sleep issues always be present? Is there anything else I can do to help him sleep better? Is this a normal toddler phase? Could there be a medical reason behind his sleep issues (he does not snore), like reflux (he still spits up quite frequently and seems to be a bit old for this)?

I would love some feedback, suggestions, possible reasons behind his troubles....

Thanks, a sleep-deprived mom

[Barksum]

Watching this thread with interest as I have one who wakes in the middle of the night. He's 11 years old, though, so usually isn't noisy, but I do wonder about the quality of his sleep.

My child with the bigger sleep problem tends not to go to bed well, and even when he does fall asleep he wakes up a few hours later. At least he doesn't get up and play in the middle of the night like he used to!

I do feel for you, as I'm still getting up at night with the one I just mentioned.

[myForeverkids3]

Our daughter was drug exposed but has had no sleep problems. Is there any way to move his bed to another room? Reflux could definately be an issue while lying down. I would talk to the dr about it and stress your concern about his sleeping patterns. It is so hard to know whether our children's issues are from the drug exposure. Even if we knew, it wouldn't change anything.Hope you have a good nights rest! Can you nap with him during the day?

[myForeverkids3]

Also, beware of drs who try to brush everything off as a drug exposure problem. "oh he was drug exposed?, okay then that's why he isn't sleeping." instead of doing some tests to rule out reflux or other possibilities. Our dd's OT, and PT and dev. screener have mentioned mild cerebral palsy but the dr said her physical delays are more likely from drug exposure. HOW could she know that? So, we are seeing a nuerologist in a few weeks.

[jessnboys]

At 9 yo, M still does not sleep through the night. Moving him into a toddler bed helped, because he could self-comfort easier. It made it harder at first as well, because he could get what he wanted, lol. At that age, I would get up with him, change him and put him back to bed with a baby or blanket that comforts. Maybe earplugs for you? Z, my oldest sleeps with ear plugs when M is having a rough night and is up a lot. He can still hear, but it muffles the noise enough. I also liked using something with white noise or comforting music to help me to not focus on M being up. Good Luck!
With the reflux, I found putting his mattress on an incline helped. You can get a wedge from upholstery stores or home health stores.

[mommytoEli]

our ds woke up constantly. he had 2 sleep studies- one about 3 months of age, another about 18-20 months. both times they marveled over how many times he woke up each night. they guessed it was due to 1. reflux, and 2. sleep apnea. when they medicated him for reflux, he slept *better*....when his tonsills and adenoids came out he slept SO much better. when he outgrew the reflux, and no longer had tonsills or adenoids, he began sleeping like a champ. now....he does have a hard time falling asleep...and if he wakes up, he will be awake for some time (he's 6)...they attribute it to his adhd.

is he medicated for his reflux? he's not too old......my son had reflux until he was 4...and was medicated until that time. i'd also, for good measure, ask a dr what they thought of my child's tonsills.

[Jenzebelle]

I'm hoping you get some good advice or tips as well, because I can use them too! We have a 10 month old fd, meth exposed, who is doing pretty great except for the sleep issues. We finally have her taking at least one real nap a day (sometimes two) instead of two 10-15 minute naps. She has a good bedtime routine. But she is getting up for a bottle (4-6oz - that's when she drinks the best) every 2-3 hours in the middle of the night, going to bed at 9:00 and getting up at 6:30.

So I guess I was trying to find out if this is just her "normal" development stage right now and if there is anything I can do to move her along a little bit.

Best wishes to you.

[irelady10]

Since I posted this, my son's sleepings has gone down hill- he was SO restless and groaning every hours or so for between 15-30 minutes (not really awake, but obviously uncomfortable). I discussed this his doc at his 18 month check-up. The sleep issues along with him still spitting up numerous times a day led to a prescription for previcid. I am so happy to say that he is sleeping much more peacefully! So, maybe reflux or GERD is his issue! We'll go back in 2 weeks to the doc to reevaluate. I hope we caught the problem before any damage was done to him internally.

My gut always told me his sleeping issues were not "normal", but when I brought it up to his docs, they said it was normal, babies are restless sleepers, etc. I learned a valuable lesson- go with my "mommy" instincts!

[GoddessDanu]

Originally Posted by irelady10

I learned a valuable lesson- go with my "mommy" instincts!

I completely agree with this. You live with your child, the doctor does not. If you feel that your child is having issues not normal to his general health then your concerns should be taken seriously and should be checked out by the doctor. That's their job. The problem is that a lot of doctors try to squeeze in as many patients as they can during the day. The more patients they see, the more bills medical insurance or the state insurance will pay. It's sad that some doctors care more for the money than being doctors. (rant over, lol)

[Barksum]

Great to hear!!

Myforever, we've had the opposite reaction from the drs. regarding the drug exposure. They tend to think everything is 'just them' (the kids' own individuality) and nothing is ever drug related. I tend to attribute MANY things to the drugs; the group of drs we've seen tend to less. I also hear the dr mention that my concerns are 'describing a normally active child', so I know that they are not HEARING what I'm SAYING. Yes, kids are active. I happen to have 5, and I've fostered several more. I have 6 nieces/nephews who treat my house as their own (as my kids do at their aunt's). Now my nieces/nephews are having kids of their own. (Dh and I got started later. ) We're around kids. When I mention that I have a child who is active and tantrums, I'm not talking mild! It gripes me to have the dr say, "You're describing a normal healthy child." HA! Spend a day in my shoes and then we'll talk!!

SO - go with your mommy gut!!

[myForeverkids3]

Originally Posted by Barksum

Great to hear!!

Myforever, we've had the opposite reaction from the drs. regarding the drug exposure. They tend to think everything is 'just them' (the kids' own individuality) and nothing is ever drug related. I tend to attribute MANY things to the drugs; the group of drs we've seen tend to less. I also hear the dr mention that my concerns are 'describing a normally active child', so I know that they are not HEARING what I'm SAYING. Yes, kids are active. I happen to have 5, and I've fostered several more. I have 6 nieces/nephews who treat my house as their own (as my kids do at their aunt's). Now my nieces/nephews are having kids of their own. (Dh and I got started later. ) We're around kids. When I mention that I have a child who is active and tantrums, I'm not talking mild! It gripes me to have the dr say, "You're describing a normal healthy child." HA! Spend a day in my shoes and then we'll talk!!

SO - go with your mommy gut!!

Yeah I know that happens too. Depends on the Dr. but I do think it is important to explore things further. It could very well be a reflux problem and could be solved with medication. I just hate hearing the dr tell me it is from the drug exposure just because she really doesn't have a solution. If it's fom the drug exposure, what can I do, there is no solution. Know what I mean?

You're right, go with your mommy instict, no one knows your child better than you!

[mypov]

My son was also drug exposed inutero and until he was 3 his sleeping problems were driving is all into insanity. He would stay up till 1 am, or go to sleep at 10 pm and then be up from 1 am to 3 or 4. Finally his doc told us to use melatonin. It comes over the counter and we use the amount recommended by his doc according to his age/weight. For the past year we have given him melatonin every night at 8 pm. He is asleep by nine and sleeps restfully until 7 am.

It is so routine that he reminds US to give it to him sometimes when he starts getting tired (as he is unable wind himself down like "normal" kids). It is not a sleep med that puts people to sleep. Over the period of a week or so it slowly regulates the bodies natural sleep cycle and promotes a deeper, more satisfying sleep. Its over the counter but important to get a docs advice on how much your child should take. We use to dissolve it in a drink when he was younger but recently found chewable. Hope this helps someone as it did for us!

[myForeverkids3]

I have used melatonin myself with no side effect. My sister gave it to my nephew for several years (he is autistic and sleeps 4-5 hours a night w/out meds!) For a child, I would definately get the right dosage info from your dr.

[beckyt]

If there is one thing I have learned that is worth knowing its that Dr's do not have all the answers and a lot of the time make assumptions. It is very hard to find a Dr that actually listens and understands that you know your baby better then he or she does. What you have to say about your concerns are not only valid but are important. There are good Dr's out there but are hard to find.

you are right in questioning the Dr and the assumptions he or she makes about cerebal palsy or anything for that matter.

Dr's are human, overworked and sometimes jaded. It is always best to question and take resposibility for seeking out the right answers.

You go momma!

[Barksum]

"If it's fom the drug exposure, what can I do, there is no solution. Know what I mean?"

Finding solutions to 'drug issues' can be problematic (ASK ME!! I'm still working on it!) but there are things that can help.

Occupational Therapy. A good OT can help with many issues, so finding a good therapist and having an eval can be a great tool. Even if the child doesn't need more therapy from the OT we've had them give us info from the evaluations and share ideas on how to help areas that can be problematic to daily life without being 'severe' enough to require therapy. It was our OT who let me know how visual one of my Ds's is. VERY visual, with a high recall of things he's seen. This has been really helpful to know. We can do things visually to help him learn, and then add in other modes of obtaining info on top of the visual to help promote his awareness of those 'weaker' areas of communication. (tactile, audio, etc.)

Diet. Many kids, I'm finding for myself and hearing from others, do better with specific diets or with minor tweaks. Most kids in general do better with less refined foods and more whole foods, low sugar, low artificial ingreds, etc. Some kids with FASD have gut problems that often aren't recognized for what they are. The big culprits for those kids seems to be casein (milk protein) and gluten. We've found that adding some supplements (fish oil, probiotics) and eliminating certain foods (for one of our kids this is dairy...we've not tried removing gluten just yet) makes a big difference in sleep patterns, behavior, etc.

Good hydration. Kids in general need to have plenty of water, and they've found that kids with ADD tendencies often need just plain old water to help them think and function better. I've not been able to keep up with keeping my kids well hydrated, so can't say if this has helped or not, but we are attempting to have them drink more water.

Outdoor exercise. Exercise is wonderful, but outdoor exercise seems to be magical. If the kids don't get enough run-around time they don't sleep and they are pretty nasty to live with.

Predictable routine. When we deviate from the normal routine too much we pay for a few days. Sleep, behaviors, etc.

If we do all the things that we've found helpful things go along somewhat smoothly, mostly. Some days, though, I feel like I didn't rub my lucky rabbit's foot, turn around the right number of times, knock on wood, throw salt over my shoulder and cross my fingers - and all in the right order! - and we just start out badly and get worse. Ugh!

I don't view these as solutions, but they do give us some tools, and they also provide a better foundation for the kids to build upon. Interestingly enough the prevailing theory seems to be that the brain damage from most drugs, barring alcohol, is able to be overcome. I think that now that we're dx'ing FASD better and getting early help for families whose kids have FASD that we might just see some improvement in the statistics about fetal alcohol, too. If people can, to some degree, overcome the brain damage done by strokes then why not the damage done by alcohol?