[melissa_bear003]

Ok, my title might be a shade egotistical, but I just wanted to share with those parents who are debating on/or have already adopted a child with FASD.

My husband was adopted. He has FASD, definately on the milder end. I realized it before we were married, and we talked about it after the wedding. He hadn't really realized that it was FASD he dealt with, thought it was just him.

My husband struggles with short term memory, and impulse control, absolutely. For him, the impulse seems to be money centred and risk taking.

He is also one of the finest men I've ever had the honour of knowing. He's a loving husband and adoring father. He's our kid's Hero, and a wonderful spouse. His youngest brother, more seriously affected with FASD had incredible foster parents who adopted him, and he's now helped write a book on FASD, and travels giving lectures on living with and raising FASD children, as well as working in a program that helps FASD youth to acquire life skills.

Just wanted to speak out on behalf of those kids with possible FASD...The future isn't all bleak. There are those, like my husband, who grow to become responsible adults, capable of managing wonderful adult relationships and parenting, and like my youngest BIL that works to make a difference in our world.

[MassachusettsMom]

Thank you so much for sharing a positive story!! Your family sounds wonderful!

[trixila]

Oh man, I needed your post! My three yr old daughter is starting to manifest some of the more challenging aspects of her exposure. I'm ready, locked and loaded, but very aware of the coming years. Thanks for not only your post, but your attitude.

[sunshinemommy]

Thank you. It gives me hope for my girls, Constance and Rosie...

Thank you for the boost...

[Forever_family]

Thank you! So needed to hear this.

[Barksum]

(((hugs))) THANK YOU! It is always wonderful to have the encouragement of others who share their stories. Sometimes I feel as though so many of the professionals out there believe that they shouldn't give too much encouragement because that wouldn't prepare families for 'the reality of FASD'.

We've wondered about FASD for a couple of the adults in our family, and we've adopted 4 children who were all prenatally exposed and/or addicted. We love to hear about other adults who are doing well and just happily living their lives.

[melissa_bear003]

I'm glad it was helpful.

As in any marriage, there's good and bad, and I guess I wrote that on a day I liked him

Nah, I'm kidding.

There has definately been a learning curve, married to someone with FASD, esp someone that wasn't diagnosed or worked with to achieve particular skills...budgeting being a great example. I had to learn that with my husband, its not that he doesn't care about our plans, dates, budget, etc enough to remember...its that he genuinely DOESN'T remember.

Figuring that out was a major milestone in our marriage.

[proudmum]

thankyou so much ,,, my dd 3 1/2 yrs has just been diag with FAE and we are very concerned with what the future holds for her... this has given us a great deal of hope,,, THANKYOU

[angelkisses0102]

Thanks...my lil' guy (5) was adopted from Russia as an infant...I am now coming to terms with the fact that he was most likely alcohol exposed. He is still a great, smart, funny little boy...we just have to learn to deal with some of his behaviors...like impulsivity. But I honestly think he is a wonderful child with a great future...and your post confirms that! Thanks!

[melissa_bear003]

I'm glad that what I had to say was helpful.

I guess I find it frustrating or hurtful when I read stuff on the forums that some folks will accept any special needs but FASD. I know from first hand that children born with FASD can go on to be wonderful, productive, excellent people.