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#1
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You have a chance to be in the delivery room but you faint at the sight of any kind of blood. Would you buck up and still try and be there when your baby is born or would bow out?
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Denice Signed with Facilitator 10/04 Matched with bparents 01/05 Born 05/13/05 and home with us 05/16/05 Finalized 04/26/06 |
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#2
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Suck it Up!
I think that the only thing you could possible do and still be able to hold your head up high - is to suck it up! Sure, chances are that you will end up laying on the floor and embarrassing yourself...but it could be a lot worse. After all, you aren't the one in the stirrups with a small army of strangers staring at your girly parts!
ps - I am praying that I am not invited into the delivery room, myself! |
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#3
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Wow, I guess I never thought that a birthmom would invite an adoptive parent into the delivery room.
I had read on some other forums that some birthparents and adoptees think it is inappropriate for the adoptive parents to even be at the hospital. This made me sad because I was hoping to have a good relationship with the birthparents if at all possible and could at least be present shortly after the birth. Please tell me that all birthparents don't think it is "creepy" (one word used on the other forum) for adoptive parents to be around so soon after the birth? But to actually get back to topic, I am fairly sqeemish about blood and whatnot, so if I were lucky enough to be invited into the delivery room then I would go in and deal with it. It would be amazing to be present when the baby was actually born. I would probably stay close to the birthmother and hold her hand or something and not look so much at the blood and what all was going on during the labor. I *think* that I would be okay looking at the baby even if it were covered in blood once it was delivered. I guess you never really know until you are in the situation though. |
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#4
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Cypress I hope you get your wish. We were invited into the delivery room for our daughters birth. Unfortunately we missed her birth by about 4 hours because of a drive.
I think you will find that it is not totally uncommon for this to happen.
__________________
Denice Signed with Facilitator 10/04 Matched with bparents 01/05 Born 05/13/05 and home with us 05/16/05 Finalized 04/26/06 |
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#5
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I was invited (not dh) into the room for my oldest son's birth. She actually really wanted me there since she was allowed to have 2 people and 1 was a best friend and she had no one else. I came in right after he was born, because he came too quick! I'm kind of glad, though.
It was very important to her for ds and I to start bonding right away. She was very adamant that I be there if possible. My youngest son, on the other hand, his Bmom did not want us at the hospital at all. So, we picked him up from the agency when he was 4 days old. |
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#6
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I say jump at the chance to be in the delivery room. That is such a special, brief, eternally memorable period that you will be able to tell your child that you were a part of.
DD's bmom invited DH and myself to be in the delivery room, and even said that we could film the birth! DH is kind of squeamish when it comes to blood and the like, but decided to suck it up this one time. After much hesitation, and assurances that she really meant it, we opted to film the delivery. DD's bgrandmom held the DVD recorder during the birth, and caught it all on film, including us cutting the cord together. I can't tell you how much of an impact that experience of seeing DD being born had - and still has - on us. Don't pass on the chance if it is offered!
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Doc & Doting Dad |
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#7
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As I said elsewhere, I didn't even want to be in the room when I delivered DD so I don't know if I could be in the room when someone else was giving birth!!
Personally, I don't like people seeing me in pain or discomfort so I'm not a fan of having others in the room myself (which makes my Mom cry every time I tell her she will NOT watch me birth any grandchildren). However, there are many eparents that do want that so if that's what you want cypress then best of luck to you!!!
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Thanksgivingmom Community Moderator Safe Haven First Mom in an Open Adoption Blogger: I Should Really Be Working |
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#8
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I'm not good with blood but when E ask me to be in the room when Castle was born so I could be the first to hold her I didn't give it a second thought! You could have poured blood over my head at that moment and I wouldn't have batted an eye, wouldn't have missed the chance to see my daughter born for the world.
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#9
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Absolutely go. You will really regret it if you don't. Besides, you can stay up by the emom's head, and you won't get too much of the blood and guts.
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#10
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Jinxed!
I should have known.....our emom called me yesterday afternoon shortly after I responded to this thread. We got around to discussing her delivery, and she mentioned that she was most afraid of being alone - that it would around 7 hours for her parents to reach her once she called them, and a little over 2 for us. I was the first time that she mentioned the delivery, so I asked if she was sure that she wanted us to be at the hospital for the birth, and she said, "of course!" We didn't get into details concerning the delivery room, but I have a feeling she is needing me to hold her hand...how exciting! and scary!
__________________
Decision to adopt! 2.20.08 ![]() Applied to agency 3.24.08 Matched! 5.01.08 ![]() Homestudy Complete! 5.06.08 Our son is born 6.17.08 Home 6.19.08 ![]()
Last edited by JustCourtney : 05-09-2008 at 05:10 AM. |
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#11
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Oh Courtney, I think it is a real honor that she trusts you like that. Hopefully your relationship will always stay so close.
Thanks everyone for the reassurances that not all birthparents think it is wierd. That makes me happy. |
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#12
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Courtney, if you're squeamish at the sight of blood, maybe you could desensitize yourself by watching those childbirth shows they air on the Discovery Channel every day. I forget what the names of the shows are...I believe there are two different series. (One of them airs right before the Adoption Stories series.) Anyway, it might be worth watching them every day!
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__________________
~~Raven~~What does not kill me, makes me stronger. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols, 1888, German Philosopher (1844-1900) ![]() |
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#13
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Im not a mom by domestic adoption so I never had this chance. I am very squeamish by nature and honestly I'm not sure what I would do.
Sometimes when something upsets me I get pale, lightheaded, the blood leaves my head and I fall down(pass out). If you feel this could happen to you and you feel a reaction coming on it's a good idea to lay your head down so you dont lose all of the blood out of your head and faint. Hopefully others can give you other survival tips. Amy K, NJ
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Adopted baby Joanna from Tver Region 10/06 |
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#14
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DH and I were in the delivery room at his birth mom's request. She had no one else there to support her and I'm glad we were able to. We sat in the room with her while she was progressing and always left when she was checked. She asked us to stand by the warmer while she was pushing and we were happy to comply. We saw nothing that would leave us feeling squeamish. DS is actually 6 months old today (I felt like we would never get here!).
__________________
Signed with facilitator 1/23/07 Profile completed & sent 2/07 M a t c h e d ! 8/23/07 Cameron is born 11/10/07 FINALIZED!!! 4/3/08 ![]() Cameron is diagnosed with Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome 11/10/07 Life is beautiful, but it's complicated. We barely make it. We don't need to understand, There are miracles, miracles. Yeah, life is beautiful. Our hearts, they beat and break. (Vega 4) |
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#15
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Happy Birthday Cameron. 6 months has gone by so quickly it is hard to believe.
__________________
Denice Signed with Facilitator 10/04 Matched with bparents 01/05 Born 05/13/05 and home with us 05/16/05 Finalized 04/26/06 |
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~~Raven~~
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