[susanandgrace]

On average, how long did it take to get matched for an infant?

We are very new to this process? Just getting started. I heard it could takes YEARS to adopt an infant, but lately I am hearing that it is much quicker.

Can anyone share their thoughts.

Thanks

[blessedbybug]

Originally Posted by susanandgrace

On average, how long did it take to get matched for an infant?

We are very new to this process? Just getting started. I heard it could takes YEARS to adopt an infant, but lately I am hearing that it is much quicker.

Can anyone share their thoughts.

Thanks

I really feel there is no average. It all depends on who you are working with, where you live, where your agency/facilitator/attorney placed from and what you are open to where the child is concerned. It also depends on what the expecting parents considering adoption are looking for in a potential adoptive family for their child. In other words, it all depends...

We waited 14 months for DD and 12 months for DS, both placed as newborns through a private, domestic agency. For our agency and province (we are in Canada, and adoption is done quite differently than most states in the US), our wait times were below average in both situations. If we would have gone through the government (foster care) we would have waitied years to be placed with a newborn.

That said, we were also open to any ethnicity and to some special needs, including certain birth defects and prenatal exposure to some substances.

The only advice I can offer is to start contacting agencies to see if you find one you might want to work with. And make some decisions about what kind of adoption you are interested in. And then go from there...

Blessings on your journey!

[kelceesmom]

Like blessedbug says, there really isn't a timeframe you can put on it. There are so many factors that go into each adoption. We were quite open to any baby so that helped us match quicker I believe. Do your homework and put all the pros and cons on the table for whichever way you go being agency, attorney, or facilitator. From the time we signed with our attorney until we matched and our baby was placed in our arms was 7 months. Good luck in your journey.

[loveajax]

I think it really depends on who you are working with, your levels of "openness" on certain issues, etc. People are always shocked when they find out that our Home Study was completed in December and we brought our DD home in May! While it can take years, it can also take days (I had a friend who was matched days after her HS was complete!). Good luck to you.

[schroem]

We used a large national agency with over 200 waiting couples and were chosen within 3 months of being activated - and at the birth of our son 7 weeks later.

Hey - it happens! We are not wealthy or grand - just happened to be what the birth parents were looking for.

[HBV]

Ours was 9 months from the day we started the process to the day we brought H home, only 5 months from the home study being completed.

There are lots of variables involved, though. For us, we were open about race, we live in a state w/ a high teen pregnancy rate, and we had a very helpful coordinator who gave us lots of good direction and support. We wound up in an open adoption (not what we'd planned, really) w/ a great family. H is a healthy baby that looks very much like he could be our biological child, and I got to be in the delivery room when he was born. There are challenges throughout this process, but being open to possibilities can have surprising rewards.

[Poleczech]

I have to agree with the other posters that it really all depends. Different agencies advertise differently, present propsective adoptive parents differently, and in those agencies where the expectant parent chooses the person(s) whom will adopt, it will also depend on their specific preferences and if they connect with the couple as well if it is an open adoption situation. For example, you may be what the expectant parent wants on paper, but once you meet or start talking, maybe you don't connect or it doesn't feel right .... that situation may not go any further.

For us, we brought home our beautiful son in just under a year from the time we were "in the book" with our agency. We were contacted by an expectant parent through our agency's website where our profile was posted, we talked and talked, and then she contacted the agency to let them know she wanted to match with us. The agency contacted us to see if we also wanted to match with her, we set up a face-to-face with her, and about a month or so later, we were at the hospital and in the delivery room for the birth of our son and she placed him our arms immediately. He was discharged from the hospital into our care and we are awaiting our's state's wait time before we can petition for fnalization.

I would check with several agencies to see what their average wait time is, and try and speak with other couples who have adopted through that agency to see what their actual wait times were.

Best wishes

[mom2justynsarah]

We used a facillitator in California. From the time we sent in our birthmother letter to the time we took our daughter home was two months.

So yes, you CAN adopt domestically and NOT wait for years. Like another poster said, there are many variables that take place. We also have a bio child. But our daughter's birthmom liked the fact that our son wanted to be a big brother.

Best of luck!
Julie

[mommamarci]

I definitely reccomend talking to others who have used the agency. One agency I talked with said 12-18 months. That was too long for me. However, I later discovered people who had used them and been matched very quickly. They told these people they over quote so the aparents do not get their hopes up too quickly.

For us home study approval to Cameron in my arms was 4 months.

[mommamarci]

I definitely reccomend talking to others who have used the agency. One agency I talked with said 12-18 months. That was too long for me. However, I later discovered people who had used them and been matched very quickly. They told these people they over quote so the aparents do not get their hopes up too quickly.

For us home study approval to Cameron in my arms was 4 months.

[jaenelle]

We waited just a tad over 2 months from agency approval to the birth of our daughter. So that was very quick in the scheme of things. We went with a large agency that does lots of placements, and specifically requested an AA or biracial baby.

[StorkWatcher]

Our agency quoted an average 18 month wait, yet we were the 3rd couple in our "group" to adopt, and our son was placed with us about 8 months after we started (we had a failed match the month before, which was our first match).

We just happened to be what those particular birthmoms were looking for, so they chose us. I've talked to others in the US who are waiting for over a year. And then others who think 6 months is a long wait. It's simply amazing all the variables that come into play.

[BabsCanada]

My story is now 10 years old and also takes place in Canada, but for what it's worth:
Applied (thru Social Services) mid-1991.
Released for home study mid-1992.
We chose to delay while we dealt with infertility testing, all the way thru to IVF.
Requested reinstatement late 1995.
Homestudy commenced Spring 1996.
Homestudy completed September 1996.
(We didn't find out til later that our profile was shown to at least one pbmom immediately; she gave birth in Oct 1996 but decided to parent).
Received phone call May 1996 advising us we'd been chosen to parent a 7 month old girl (yes - the same baby born in Oct 96)
Three days later we were home with dd.
I guess if you remove the time period that we chose to withdraw from the program, we'd have been 1 year waiting to be released for homestudy, and another year for the homestudy process and coming home with our child = 2 years total.
Incidentally, I remember when we first applied we were told we'd be waiting 3 - 5 years for a healthy infant.
Also, in 1997, we met a local couple who brought home their healthy infant boy some 7 months after they applied to Social Services, they were immediately released for homestudy and matched with a pbmom - I think their start-finish adoption was fast-tracked for some reason (? - they're great people! but it sure seemed odd how fast everything happened for them)

I believe that what's meant to be, will be. Whether it's 6 months or 6 years, the child that's meant to be yours will come to you.

[snaps]

We used a large facilitator in California and were signed up with them late March/early April, matched in September and baby was born December 1st. Prior to this match we had two other potential matches that didn't work out in July a week apart. All in all the wait wasn't too bad I guess compared to the horror stories you here about waiting years.

[MichelleL11]

And have just come home from ICPC. We were open to any race and a fully open adoptive relationship. We were signed up with two agencies and actually matched through our second "back-up" agency.

Every situation has its pros and cons -- you just have to decide what you are willing to work with. For us a healthy baby was most important and we were willing to work with anything else. And that is what we have -- a beautiful healthy AA daughter to enrich our lives and meeting her need to know her genetic background will add new culture and experiences to our own.

MichelleL