[dbishop1206]

I havent heard from our agency for two weeks now so I thought I would call to check on our status. I get a voice mail today from our caseworker telling me its not necessary to call that its their agency policy that if a family is not contacted in a month that someone will call them to update their status. I understand agencies work on behalf of ** and babies. But why should an adoptive family feel gulity to call every couple of weeks to check in. I am sure IF there was a situation they would call ... but maybe sometimes you need to hear something ... We have a few situations that may come up in a week.... you are still there on our list just nothing in yet but we'll call. Adoptive families have gone through alot and need alittle time too. Is it right for me to feel this way ?! Is there anyone else out there who is getting them same or is it just my agency ??

Love to hear from you guys !!!!

[HappyTwinsMom]

Our agency director told me during our waiting period that some potential adoptive parents want to be updated on every little thing (that was us!) and some just want to hear when they've been chosen. She and I kept in very close contact, primarily through email, and she had absolutely no problem with me calling or emailing. If she had nothing to report, she told me that.

Personally, I don't think your agency is being very fair. You are paying them for their service, am I right? You should be able to contact them whenever you please. JMHO!

[dbishop1206]

HappyTwinsMom ... This is how I feel. I know their priority is the ** and placing babies & I do respect that. However, they need to take the adoptive parents in consideration too. This was the first call in four months they I called to check in. Our calls were coming bi-weekly and this is the first time there was a long stretch of no calls (2 weeks). I thought when they appointed a case worker this is what is was for. Anyway, Adoption has taught patience ... so I will remain paitent and keeping praying for my baby to come home :-) ... HappyTwinsMom ... Thanks for responding.

[BrandyHagz]

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[dbishop1206]

Brandy, Sorry about that I didnt realize it. Will keep that in mind on future postings.

[Linny]

I think if you are paying this agency, then you have every right to be contacted periodically as a courtesy to you! Even if you were involved with fostering, it only makes sense to keep up with the clientel to know where the best place to place a child would be.
And......I can't tell you how many times I've heard attorneys and agencies say things like: "oh, gee....we wondered if you had had a placement yet!?" "Or gee, we thought you had just fallen off of the face of the earth!"

I think your agency is being rather rude. Maybe every two weeks might be a little too often, but certainly, I'd want to let them know about my status each month!

Sincerely,

Linny

[dbishop1206]

Dear Linny, Thank you for your comment. They did say it was the agency policy to contact adoptive families monthly to update their status. But there will be times during this process we need encouragment too. This is the first time I called in " 4 months " and felt they should of understood that. However, the pain makes us stronger so I will continue to be patient and pray for the little one.

Thanks again for taking time !!!

[momofmykids]

D,
Since I am a very impatient person, I would probably remind the agency that it is ME who is paying THEIR salaries (in a very nice way, of course). How rude for them to treat you that way!!!

Hope your baby finds you soon!

[dbishop1206]

Good Point ... Momofmykids ... Well, Lets just hope they are trying to be nice or maybe it was a bad day for them. I talked to a friend of mine today who adopted a few years ago w/ the same agency and she really gave me encouragement. I'll just keep living each day .. knowing one day .. I'll be a Mom to a beautiful baby.

Thanks for writing !!!

[Nevada Jen]

I know how you feel. About 1/2 the contact with my agency has made me cringe. Luckily, I am still at the point where I could use them just for my homestudy and go with a different agency for placement. (I sure hope they read this board and realize that!) But like you, I have heard nothing but good things from everyone who has dealt with them. So I am going on the assumption that perhaps I am a little hard to take for the type of people who typically are in the social work field.

Still I am with you. My feeling is if I am paying them they could at least be pleasant to me every time I deal with them.

Feel free to vent here all you want. You have a sympathetic ear with me!

Jen

[jheald]

All I can say is that if I hadn't phoned or emailed every few weeks nothing would have happened. Our caseworker was just not very good at keeping us informed or working for us. I've heard the same thing from others too so I know it wasn't just us. Anyway, as the others said...call....email. You're paying for that too.

Janet

[dbishop1206]

Hi Jen ... Thanks for writing. The one thing I can say about the forum is the response I get from people here. It's hard to vent to family & friends because they all cant relate. But you here - Have turned out to be friends. It's good to hear that you are not alone in how you feel. Well, I have came to the conclusion to just remain patient and try to stay busy.

Janet ... You're probably right & knowing me I'll call them again in a few weeks :-)

[Dee1234]

I think it is important to stay in touch with your adoption agency throughout the process. They need to know what is going on with you, and you need to know how things are going on their end.

I've found e-mail to be the best way to keep in touch with our social worker. Mostly, I update her on our networking efforts and keep her informed of any new potential situations. That way I don't feel like I am bothering her with phone calls, and she can respond if/when she wants. I do call her when there is something important to share, and she does the same for us. It works out quite well!

You might want to ask your social worker if he or she would mind staying in regular contact through e-mail.

Hope this helps!

Best of luck to you,