[sweettooth4lifefamil]

We currently have 2 biological children and are looking to adopt a 3rd child from Russia. Can anyone tell me if they had problems with their adopted child not feeling like they "fit in" because they were the only one in the family that was adopted. I would like to think that it won't be an issue, but I want to be prepared if it is. It's important to us that this child feels as if they belong as much as our bio kids, any advice would be helpfull!

[mrsred]

Well, I don't know how relavant what I have to say is, since we actually have the opposite. Our oldest is the only one that is not adopted (my four year old thinks that is quite sad that poor J was never adopted).
But, we have added children one at a time. When dd11 came to live with us ds12 and ds 8 were already quite bonded. There were some jealousy issues, but really not so bad. Then when dd4 came alone she was the newbie. She was also quite a bit younger than the other three.
Since the "new kid" will often need a lot of extra attention to make the adjustment you need to be careful not to have the others feel that you are disregarding thier needs. I have found that I have less problems with them being jealous of each other than with them being jeolous of the time and energy I put into each child.

[mom2justynsarah]

I had my son (bio) first, and then adopted my beautiful little girl six years later. She is now 3.5, and my son is 9 1/2. My son has been the one who tends to get jealous/envious of her ("She gets all the attention, etc.") They both fight for my attention (at the same time of course). If one is hugging me, the other one will jump on my back, or try to push the other one off, etc. Or it's the "She hit me" "He hit me" game. But they do love and adore one another. I'd say it's pretty much your typical sibling rivalry around here.

All I can say is that I certainly hope my daughter will never feel like she doesn't fit in. She has brought so much joy, warmth and happiness into our lives. She is our little princess and you can bet she knows it! lol.