[GMH]

Were you getting sleepy when you read my last post.It was my brothers supposed b-farther had cancer and his sister was now looking for his b-son.It was her I was refering to as geniune and my b-mother as not genuine but a false person.Not you so after you get yourself out of a twist you will realise the advice you have given has been appreciated .I also think you are genuine
and have your'e own struggle with your b-daughter ,to which I have tried to help you with.
You are right in your P-M only I can run a b-mother down with class ,so you have to forgive me if you though it was directed as you.
Do what my wife does take a long hot soak in the tub its better than prozac and it will chill you out and make you feel refreshed,plus give you sometime on your own .
Or do what I do go and give your kidneys a damm good thrashing
with whiskey.

Chow

[Robinsmom]

GMH,
You are going to drive me to that whiskey! In your post, you were quite vauge as to whom you were talking about, I was not sleepy, I was just getting up, I always get up at three, as I have to have evrybody out of here by 6:30. Its also the only time I can use the computor without 6 kids hounding me to use it. I think you should reread your post, then you will understand my confusion. Well, I am glad to know, that you think I am the real deal, cause I am, and you do also help alot, even though you like to grumble. Maybe you should try writing in American, instead of using that **** accent, its hard to understand sometimes you have to remember, its been along time since I had to figure out the **** limey accent, so if I misunderstand sometimes, its not my fault. How was your trip to New York, anyways, with all the blurting going on, I forgot to ask.
Colleen

[GMH]

I don't have a limey accent for one and it is our native toungue english , american is a slang version of english lol.
I do believe my partner has had a quite a few problems with our frends across the pond , including them threwing the teddy bears ut of the pram and the deal was completly off,but I think its back on and it we should be going 1st week of october 2 days I think.
You might remeber I said something ages ago about the maternal bond between mother and child .Well I read something yesterday in a newspaper that said"birth mothers and adoptees go through there whole lives trying to find or repair it".Doesnt sound like anyway ever does though.
Before you blurt back remind yourself I'm a kiwi not a limey ,the slang in london for an american is "septic tank".LOL.

Take care

[Robinsmom]

GMH,
I was taught English, by a true Englishman, not American, English, so I do know of what you speak. Septic tank, indeed, don't those english people know that in America, there are very few septic tanks anymore, that went out with the dark ages, they all have sewers now.

That story you read, in the newspaper, doesn't seem to off the mark to me. In fact, it sounds pretty much like how it is. Maybe many don't get a chance to repair it, but they spend thier lives trying to. You have to agree with that. It could stem from the maternal bond, or just from a sense of wanting to know who you are, and where you came from. From the point of the adoptee, or a need to know, where the child you gave birth to is, and that you really did make the right choice, from the point of the birthmother. In all truth, my heart goes out to those who are still searching, and will for years, I have been very lucky, I found what I was looking for, and to a degree, so have you. The end result, may have been different, but at least, both of us got to know. I can't imagine, looking for years and years, and never getting to know the anwser. It must be awful, and is probabley what most of the people who write here are going through. If it wasn't made so difficult for everybody, to find these people they are looking for, think how different everything would be.
What are your thoughts on your bmother, should she decide to contact you on your birthday? Will you ever mellow enough to give her another chance, is there something deep down inside, that does want to know? In the case of most people, I would say no, but in your case, I'm not sure, you seem to have really given up on the whole idea. Time will tell, I guess.
Talk to you later.
Colleen

[GMH]

Limey is taken by most as an insult thats probably why the Londoners cam up with septic tank-yank in there ryming slang.
As for my birth mother I don't think she will contact me as I sent her letter back"not known at this address".Which is good as the way I feel know she can eat a bag if ****,but who knows with time.
Face it I'm looking at a slag and liar or a very confused person either way she has alot of explaining to do and it will all know be lies that will comeout .
GoodLuck to anyone searching or about to go into reunion hope you have better luck than me.

[banjo]

I've found you guys on a different thread! Bless! GMH since you returned the letter to the bmother unopened how can she explain? Also there's always a chance that someone else deleted your wife's emails to her without her knowledge. My husband and I share the same email address at home...I'd like to think that he never deletes my emails but then how would I know??

This thread is asking a very important question and I'm pleased that sspete posted it. lol Banjo

PS I get a visit with my bdaughter next week and i'm buzzing!

[GMH]

Banjo

Her email is a hotmail one so you have to go online to get it ( as she doesn't have a home pc .Don't worry about her its a lost cause anyway.Great news about your visit ,is it the first one.

[postal215]

I have been trying to get in touch with my adopted daughter who has found me it has been 3 months since we spoke.She said she was writing a letter to her biological dad who I helped her find.After that she wouldnt speak to me anymore if she was online I would im her and she would slam offline.She hasnt been online in 3 months I have tried to telephone but her voice mail comes on and she doesnt return my calls.I fear this may have something to do with the letter to her biological father as he has been diagnosed with mental prob;ems which his family blamed me for when i was 17 they couldnt face him having mental illness so they blamed me for giving him lsd whicj i never took or even know what it looks like.I fear that they may have said bad things about me to her in response to her letter because everything was fine untill she wrote them the letter and stupid me is the one who gave her the address what do you think do you think she decided to stop speaking to me or was it the letter?

[GMH]

Hi
Its hard to tell which but who know's what her father said about you,or his family for that matter.I have lies from my b-mothers family "oh well talk to her then call you back and I never got the call.Try not to beat yourself up about something that now seems out of your control.

[Robinsmom]

Laurene,
Sorry to hear about your problem, but I know how you feel. My birthdaughters, birthfather, is also, out of his mind. For that reason, I told her about hime right from the beginning. She wanted to know about him, but after she found out how he really was, she wants no contact with him. Not that I blame her, he is a nut. My advice to you, is send her a letter, explaining the truth, I think that in time, his true colors will come out, and she will see him for what he really is. When that happens, she will come back. I was always afraid that my birthdaughter would ask me about him, I'm sure she wants to know about that side of her birthfamily too. So when I first found her, I promised myself, if she asked, I would just tell her the truth, if she still wanted to see him, so be it, but thank god she didn't. He would have really messed her up. My policy is always tell the truth, no matter how ugly. Good luck to you.
Colleen

[Robinsmom]

Banjo,
So glad you found us. It took me a while to find GMH when I got back from vacation. I'm sure that your meeting will be a great one. Just remember that she is a budding teenage girl, and a bundle of hormones!! so just keep it light, I'm sure she will love you. Talk to you soon.
Love,
Colleen

[Robinsmom]

GMH
I am sure happy that I am the best of two world, a lime floating in a tank. I've been called worse. I bet your glad that there are now others to talk to, and you don't have to rely on my dribble all the time. Talk to you soon.
Colleen

[GMH]

Coleen

Don't know where you got that idea from its good talking to you
,just like a real mother should be.Which for me is hard to know as
I don't think I have ever had a normal chat with either of my mothers.NY is off there coming to us ,which is good too many missiles and bombs your way.

[ingodshands]

GMH

How are you doing? In reference to something you said on this thread. Its unfortunate that in these situations there does seem to be so many LIES told. I have same experience from my birthmother and her family in the past. Then another time they will change the story completely to what you have been told by them before, so its so obvious it is a lie!

It would be so much fairer on the adoptees concerned, if birthmother's just told the TRUTH, no matter how bad the truth is. Or is that all we are worth...lies....deceit etc.

THIS IS NOT INTENDED TO BE DIRECTED AT ANY BIRTHMOTHERS ON THIS SITE, JUST VENTING A LITTLE ANGER, AND SYMPATHISING WITH GMH!

[Robinsmom]

GMH,
There you go again, taking everything so serious! I was joking, I know that my imput is always welcome, who would you bounce your some what nasty remarks off of. I see from the last post, that you have found a soul mate,(ha-ha) , only joking about the soul mate part, but they seem to share your veiws. Another birthmother basher-he-he- . I not so sure that I like your reference to bombs, that all I need. Its crazy enough in my small corner of NY without bombs. Theres no towers in my home town of Basom, just alot of cows, and a few native americans, who live on the resevation, down the road. Nothing to bomb here. So, I sit here among the children, and cows, and await your reply to the previous post. I can't wait. I'll talk to you soon.
Colleen