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#1
04-02-2005, 08:54 AM
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Oh Jesus help me
Ok so depression I am not sure if it is coming anxiety is a little I feel like I am bearing the brunt of some thing unmentionalble at this point. some times I cant think it is hard for me to hold conversation some times expesially when thoughts are running through my head. I have so much going on ... my son is turning 6 months old then an unmetionable thing was shared with me and that seems to take up more of my thoughts than anything. Both things kinda crash together and ..... Geez I find my self crying alot !! I have to hang in and be strong for my family mainly the younger sister. Being the oldest is really not an easy thing.
dont feel like writting about this any more please pray for me
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birthmother to Zachary Stephen Born 10-5-04 mother to Tatum Ann Marie born 12-13-02 " I believe that God made me for a purpose... and when I run I feel his pleasure." Harold Abrahams Chariots of fire "In the place of suffering there is a God worth worshipping .... on these wings of worship we shall rise." Jason Upton " Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him " Aldous Huxley James 1:2-5 , James 1:12, Psalm 84, Psalm 59:9-10 
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#2
04-02-2005, 09:49 AM
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Sorry you are having such a tough time, feel free to pm if you want to talk.
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#3
04-02-2005, 12:54 PM
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Faith,
I'm so sorry for your pain. Please know that many prayers are with you right now and God is also with you. Keep posting, it helps. (((Hugs))), Robin
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Birthmom to Joshua 7/4/84 & Rebecca 12/12/87 and Mommy to Rachael  "Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it...It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more." Author Erica Jong
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#4
04-02-2005, 05:18 PM
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Quote:
When my mom died I found my thoughts would not leave my bson.. My pain was centered around not knowing if he was okay (I had not found him at this point).. My grief got all mixed up.. I can remember teaching myself to stay in the moment.. Always stay in the moment.. Concentrate on right now.. It will pass.. It always passes.. We humans have such a capacity to heal.. I believe.. Such an incredible capacity.. Your grief is a good thing not a bad thing.. Keeping it inside is wrong.. Pushing it away and not talking about it is wrong.. IMO I and others understand what you are going through.. Believe that.. Your son is okay.. Jackie Last edited by Jackiejdajda : 04-02-2005 at 05:20 PM.
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#5
04-03-2005, 12:29 PM
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I know my son is wonderful I am not worried about him honestly. It is something much different that has me so confused and going "crazy". It really has nothing to do with my son and if it does I will feel totally resposible for it but I know I should not feel that way but I would. I wish I could share more but it is a delicate thing and I cant say anything.... All this other stuff is coming in right on top of Zachary's 6 months and it seems so hard
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birthmother to Zachary Stephen Born 10-5-04 mother to Tatum Ann Marie born 12-13-02 " I believe that God made me for a purpose... and when I run I feel his pleasure." Harold Abrahams Chariots of fire "In the place of suffering there is a God worth worshipping .... on these wings of worship we shall rise." Jason Upton " Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him " Aldous Huxley James 1:2-5 , James 1:12, Psalm 84, Psalm 59:9-10
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#6
04-03-2005, 03:31 PM
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Faith
Life is so darn tough.. Thats what I think.. I am sending you a prayer of strength.. Jackie
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#7
04-05-2005, 07:23 AM
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That is true but then again no one ever said it would be easy.
Today is the big day!! Not the really big one but today is the day that Zachary turns 6 months old. Right now I am ok. No pictures yet but I should get them anyday now. Weird it is like I am excited to see but also scared. Jess
__________________
birthmother to Zachary Stephen Born 10-5-04 mother to Tatum Ann Marie born 12-13-02 " I believe that God made me for a purpose... and when I run I feel his pleasure." Harold Abrahams Chariots of fire "In the place of suffering there is a God worth worshipping .... on these wings of worship we shall rise." Jason Upton " Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him " Aldous Huxley James 1:2-5 , James 1:12, Psalm 84, Psalm 59:9-10
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#8
04-07-2005, 04:57 PM
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Jess.. How are you doing?
Jackie
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