[jennbirthmom]

Matthew, I know making choices is hard and I guess I never really knew how hard this one was going to be. There is not a day that I don't think about you and I don't sent you a good wish. You have a wonderful Mom, and I should know because I chose her for you. I have to believe that all of this is all apart of a larger plan that I was never ment to know until it unravel in font of me. There are times that I am surprises and times that I am depressed and times that I wish you were here to share the highs and lows of our life. I know that it will never be possible, but maybe someday I will see you a man instead of the baby that I left in the arms of such a good and wonderful woman. She is everything that I was not at the time when I made the decission to(not give you up, because that is never possible as a Mom) give you the life I would have liked to provide to you. I believe adoption is a choice made not for the mother but only for the child. You gave me a gift that may never know about and that was to get my life together and now I have the life that I would have liked to give you but now I give to the family I have. Remember always that sometimes out of love choices are made for someone else that can be the best for all. Good thoughts, Good dreams until we can be reunited Love your birthmom