[Anigel]

Okay ladies and gents, I'm looking for a peice of advice.

My situation is as follows:

I'm 23 and my husband is 34. We're looking to adopt an older child. Our agency told us that we should begin creating a life book for our perspective child.

Oh but wait! (and the truth comes out) Three years ago I was hit by a car going 55 mph. I was crossing the road at the time. Are there ugly scars? Sure, mostly on my right leg. Can I walk? Yep, but not very far or very long.

In order continue doing what we love, my husband usually pushes me in a wheelchair when we go to shopping, fairs, shows, etc. When I do walk my gait is so normal, most people have to be told, or shown the scars to understand why standing in line and that sort of thing is a problem for me.

I want our future child to know this up front, I don't want them to say "yes, I want to be a part of that family" and then find out that mom rides in a wheelchair sometimes.

I think the lifebook is the best way to tell them before they get their little hearts set on being a family with us. I was thinking I would write a "till there was you" letter.

"Till there was you,

I think about you all of the time, the way you smile, and the way you play. I know you've been through some hard times and have had painful experiences, and I have too. I was in a car accident three years ago, I'm not the same person I was before, now I sometimes get to ride around in a wheelchair and just like you sometimes I still hurt, but I believe because of this we'll make a great family..."

What do you all think? Maybe you have another idea? I don't want to disappoint anyone, so I'm not going to hide something like this.

[PinkRibbon]

I think it's good, but if it were me I'd take out the "because of this we'll make a great family" because it reads to me like you're saying I can understand you because I was hit by a car and that will make us a great family.
The other thing is that kids aren't dumb, so depending on the age of the child, saying you get to be in a wheelchair might sound like you're talking down to them.