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Originally Posted By Summer

I am not sure if I should go through an agency or an ad in the paper or an adoption lawyer. I just want to find good parents for my baby.

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Originally Posted By adoptive mom

summer, if you are unsure of where to go, it is probably best to go through an adoption agency as they will be able to counsel you regarding all of your options. Is there anyone you can ask for a referral to an agency? Not all agencies that handle adoption are the same: some will let you choose the family, others will "match" you with someone on their list. I wouls recommend seeking out what's known as a licensed child welfare agency. These are agencies that are obligated to consider the needs of the child first and which typically have experience counseling prosective birthparents in their options. In the meantime, you night lok at soe of the profiles at various sites on the web, including parentprofiles.com to get an idea of the kind of family you would like for your child if you choose to pursue an adoption plan. Good luck.

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Originally Posted By michelle

Summer - any of those choices can work - it is a matter of doing what is comfortable for YOU. If you do choose to respond to an ad in a newspaper - get in touch with the prospective adoptive parents attorney/agency early to make sure they have a completed homestudy. Parentprofiles does require proof of a homestudy to post, but not all on-line profile pages do.

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Originally Posted By m

Most agencies do semi-open (can include visits) and fully open adoptions - agencies that do closed adoptions are nearly impossible to find - if any adoptions are closed in this day and time it is at the birthparents requests -

NO adoption professional would ever be shocked by a request for openness.

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Originally Posted By Hi Summer from Dee

Summer you do have choices From our experience our Birthmom answered an classfied add in a newspaper that was 4yrs ago after speaking with her she contacted our attorney and then we provided an attorney for her at our expense this is how a private adoption works,just thought it may be helpful to share our experience,It was positive and here we are hoping to connect again if you have any questions pls do so at RoseLucianno@aol.com

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Originally Posted By Jen

Hi Summer..hope you are doing fine as well as the precious life you are carrying. I agree with Rose, you do have choices as far as going through the resources that are available to you. I AM NOT SOLICITING just offering advice and guidance, and yesI hope one day to find our angel through open adoption. One of the most important things is that anyone looking to adopt should already have the completed and approved homestudy as well as all background checks. If you go through any resource make sure this has already been done because you will be reviewing profiles of potential adoptive families to choose from. If you need anything else or if I can be of further help or you just want to chat you can always email me at Poogiebr@ptd.net. This goes for anyone from this group.

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Originally Posted By Rkpoe

I'm sorry, but I just have to respond to this post. As an Amom and a hopefully soon to be Amom of an infant, I'm really upset about the posting that the Bmom can "change her mind" at any time even tho the Aparents have paid money. This isnt about the money. Its about what is right for YOU and your BABY. Please make sure that you recieve counceling before you decide what you want to do Summer. Please dont make the decision to let someone else parent your baby and then at the last minute, take him/her back. The whole adoption process is a roller coaster for both Bmoms and Aparents. We are all stressed throughout the whole process and everyone HAS to work together to do what is best for the child. There is enough negative publicity about adoption as it is, just please, whatever your decision, stick with it.. for EVERYONES sake and sanity.

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Originally Posted By RkPoe

Something else I failed to mention. Summer, you might want to look at a facilitator. We are contracted through one of those, and have been on a waiting list for 10 months. Also, we have already had a homestudy done (background check, fingerprints etc). This is required by ALL states before placing a baby with a family. So, if a family has a homestudy done and is with an agency already, they are approved and just waiting on a baby. If you have any questions that I might help you with, please contact me and I will be happy to lead you in the right direction or find you the answer. Rkpoe@att.net

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AMEN!!!!!! VERY WELL SAID. IT'S A ROLLER COASTER FOR BOTH THE ADOPTIVE PARENTS AS WELL AS THE BIRTHPARENTS!!!

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Originally Posted By PLEASE READ RULES!!

PLEASE READ RULE!!! BIRTHMOTHER BOARD, ALLOW THEM HELP FROM OTHER BIRTHPARENTS NOT THOSE WISHING TO ADOPT!!!

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Originally Posted By Sorry but it's true

As hard as it is for you to accept, a birthmother DOES have the right to change her mind up until the last minute and any RESPONSIBLE adoption facilitator has the legal and moral responsibility to inform her of that right. That is her baby until she signs those papers. Sometimes no amount of counseling can prepare a birthmother for the reality of the birth of that child. She should not be forced or coerced or guilted into "sticking with it" if she truly feels in her heart it is wrong. Your feelings should be the last of her considerations.

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Originally Posted By to sorry but its true

You are exactly right.People seem to become unethical in their hot pursuit of a child many times.If the child does not NEED a home-the adoptive parents should stay out of it.It does not NEED a home until the mother signs and even then she should have time to see if she can live with the reality of it.So many people cry for months over a miscarriage or not getting pregnant and yet they are completely heartless when the real mother decides to NOT lose her child to adoption.