[mgir]

Hi
I am 8 months pregnant and I want to have my baby adopted, as I know he would have a better life raised by someone more financialy stable.
The problem is, the father(we broke up months ago)will not allow it.
He said he wants custody and wants to make me pay max child support for punishing me for breaking up. I know he would be a bad father because he's imature and has been in and out of jail for years.
Now I would like to know, what are my rights? Can I just go behind his back and get the baby adopted??
Or will I have no choice and give him the baby and hope for the best?

thank you so much

[josh1788smom]

From what I have understood, preference is given to the mother to parent the child.

For you to place your child with an adoptive family, I believe the father would have to terminate his rights, and it doesn't sound like that is his intention. Perhaps the child would be better in your custody considering he has a less than boring past. I don't know how much weight they would attribute to his past. We all know people that are good with the song and dance of how they have changed.

Good luck to you.

[minibus]

The baby's birthfather can not force you to parent / pay child support, in my understanding. However, he can assert his rights as a parent, barring CPS / DSHS involvement. It is possible that he could say that he wants to parent and then not follow through, using it as a threat or leverage. His parental rights would need to be terminated for an adoption plan to go through, either by him signing away his rights, or the court terminating his rights (either by his them taking away his rights (not usually the case) or by legal advertisement and him not coming forward to claim his rights).

If you believe that he would not follow through with signing away his rights, or would step up to parent the child, I would be careful of signing away your rights in an adoption plan. After you do so, you would not have the choice to "take it back" if indeed he decided to parent the child.

Consult a reputable adoption attorney or agency if you want to know more about your options.

Best of luck in this difficult situation!