[Hopeing_Mom]

I just wanted to see if any birthmom out there placed with a single parent?

I am a 31 year old Christian single woman hoping to adopt. Due to infertility issues and being single I am hoping to adopt. I am working with an agency and going the independent route as well. But everyone tells me that being single I will never be able to adopt a younger child. I have a flexible job and supportive family and friends.

Do you think that I am fooling myself into thinking a birthmom will choose me for their child?

Thanks for any responses,

Sharon

[Hopeing_Mom]

Sorry after I posted I looked farther down and saw the same question. Any new replies would still be appreciated.

[orynko]

I am an adoptee, who was adopted by a single parent.
AFAIK my bmom spoke to many prospective adoptive parents, and chose my amom, 37 at the time, over many other married couples. My amom did have to wait quite a while though, several years. She was in the process of trying for international adoption when my bmom spoke to her.

I know you asked for bmom answers, but I know it did not bother mine that my amom was single, and older.

[Hopeing_Mom]

Thanks. I'm glad you answered. I always wondered if my child would be upset that I "stood in the way" of a couple adopting him as some people have told me.

[orynko]

I'm almost 20 years old now, and I would not have wanted anything to be any different. I love my amom, and my grandparents, more than anything. Granted, when I hit puberty I gave my mom a very, very, hard time... and yes, I did (regretfully) say some things in that respect out of anger/frustration/etc (I know this is no excuse, but she knows I did not mean it, and that I do love her dearly). I think it was just "that age"..where mom/dauhter don't get along, I wanted more freedom, she wanted to pull me tighter, etc.
Her love for me was enough, though. I did not need a father to fill that gap. I have never wanted anything else. It never actually mattered to me that she got me over a couple, because the fact that she's single did not change the love that was there for me, and she always provided me with everything I wanted or needed.

I hope this helps.

[sls_93]

My husband and I went the independant route for a long time and let me tell you it will probaly fail most of the time. With us we got very close to the birthmoms and then they would deciede to parent there child. Which was great for them, but not so great for us. We are now in the process of being approved for foster/adopt parents. This is the best inexpensive way to go. They do not require you be married to foster or adopt children in there care. Check with your state agency and get more details. We are in Texas and we have a great case worker. Good luck!

[SchmennaLeigh]

This personal Birthmother's response:

I would not have placed with a single parent. That was a main reason that I was placing my child; to give her a two parent, stable home environment.

However, I am not the voice for every Birthparent ever known. I do know of a single Mother who adopted a few years ago. It's not impossible. Keep faith.