[kelceesmom]

I'm glad to hear you are taking steps to make sure the safety of you and your baby are taken care of.

I think once that you are settled you should contact your agency and see what their advice for you is. They do deserve to know what is going on.

[kune]

035568
You wrote....

My husband and I have had our baby for almost 2 months now. I feel like I have been a great mom to him, but my husband has all of a sudden turned into this monster. He is very jealous of me even getting near our baby. He's been very abusive to me both physically and mentally. He has not hurt our son in any way, but I feel like I want our baby out of this situation and I will do anything to remove him.

Then on a further post you talk about your baby being a little over a month old. Can I presume the problems in your relationship are a little over one month old too?

I think you owe your husband and yourself some counselling and some time to try to sort this out. He was your obviously the love of your life pre adoption, and so my advice would be to put some time into trying to reconnect as a couple now rather than looking forward to a quick divorce and sole custody. Are you still both living in the same house?

I want to get as far away from my husband as possible

Did you share? Did you exclude Dad unintentionally? Do you feel this child is yours - solely yours - to love and care for? I know Moms are the care-givers in 99% of parenting situations, but every Mom learns that Dad has a special place in the child's formative years too.

This may sound harsh but I fear your reactions are far over the top. As a birthmother I relinquished so my child could have what I could not provide. ie. a two parent family. All marriages have problems, and all couples have disagreements. I don't condone violence of any sort but I suggest you look at the relationship between you first before you start court proceedings to end the marriage. It would certainly be "in the child's best interests".

Ann

[WhiteTiger07]

If my amom approach me with this situation I would tell her to leave him because for the well being of our child and herslef that is not the right situation to be in. If the birth parents are very comfortable with you and have a decent relationship with you I see no reason that they would not support you given the situation.

I wish you the best of luck and hope that everything works out for both you and your son.

[mnmommy1]

I am a little late hearing about this, first off i am so sorry you are dealing with this.. and im glad to hear you are somewere safe Please tell the agency, the birthmom has a right to know... take care!

[koalove]

well, as a birthmother i would definately be really upset. part of the point of adoption is that birthparents want their children to have a better life than what we could have offered. abuse just doesnt figure into that. what you are going through is horrible. im so sorry things are rocky and you are right, get yourself and baby the heck out of there! im not sure of the legalities in your state about divorce and adoption and all that, but you really dont want to risk loosing the baby, but also dont want to be near the abuse. if my daughters a parents divorced i would be devistated, but even more than that, enraged if her mama didnt get her away from an abuser. it would also be terribly hard on the baby to loose you at this point and that is something most birthparents would look at. i dont know if your adoption is open or closed but if its not totally open, im guessing the agency cant share your news with your child's birthfamily. my adoption agreement says we are required to tell each other of moves, mairrages, divorces, children born etc. but that is here in oregon and that is a wide open adoption. get out of there mama. take care of yourself and your new babe! hugs!