[mom2GRLC]

I know many birthmothers have said that they would like to be awcknowledged in some way by their childs adoptive parents on or around mothers day. I'm just curious how many of you were awcknowledged this mothers day and in what ways?

Now lets turn the question around a little bit.....how many of you awcknowledged the adoptive mother on mothers day and if so in what ways?

[browneyes0707]

I debated on whether or not to acknowledge DD's a-mom on Mother's Day, the only reservation that I had was that I had just sent an emotional e-mail to her 6 weeks before on DD's birthday, and since we are still in the process of reconnecting, I did not want to overwhelm her. I figure that if we do have all intentions of remaining in eachothers lives, there will be an opportunity to honor her when the relationship has progressed a bit more. But emotionally? Please, that woman is on a pedistal in my eyes, she's an amazing mom I would have sent her an e-mail, if we were corresponding via another medium I would have called/sent a card.

I think ANY successful relationship should be a two way street, and in this case (as in all my personal relationships) I do my best to see that philosophy through.

[SchmennaLeigh]

I have always and will always acknowledge D on Mother's Day. This year, since she was out of town on Mother's Day, I just sent a card but in years previous it has been accompanied with flowers.

D is an AMAZING Mother. But I tell her that all the time, too.

[blessedbybug]

I would be truly honored if it happened, but it didn't and I don't expect it.

[HBV]

I gave M a photo bracelet w/ pictures of H a couple of days before Mother's Day at the birthmother's mass we attended w/ her. We took her and her parents out to dinner afterward.

They didn't do anything for me, but it didn't really occur to me to think they would. They've done other nice things for us, so it's not that big of a deal.

[InBlindFaith]

Since mine is closed...I quietly wished her a happy Mother's Day. When and if I ever get to meet DD's Mom I will be sending her a card and flowers.

[thanksgivingmom]

I sent DD's mom a Happy First Mother's Day card.

I got a letter from her shortly after (which I'd been expecting for months) and she added to it that it was very thoughtful of me to send her a Mother's Day card, and that it showed great maturity.

I really would have liked it if the next sentence had recognized the fact that Mother's Day might have affected me, just mentioning, that she knew it was my first Mother's day also. It stung a bit, but I'll get over it. I have to.

[lahdh4]

I said a quick little wish at my house and last year I sent L a birthday card since we weren't going to go to the agency picnic because of her birthday and I heard nothing.

[mom2justynsarah]

Originally Posted by mom2GRLC

I know many birthmothers have said that they would like to be awcknowledged in some way by their childs adoptive parents on or around mothers day. I'm just curious how many of you were awcknowledged this mothers day and in what ways?

Now lets turn the question around a little bit.....how many of you awcknowledged the adoptive mother on mothers day and if so in what ways?

My daughter's birthmom called me to say "Happy Mothers Day." (no cards) It was plain, simple and very nice!

[thanksgivingmom]

oh! and SHOULD it be a two way street? I think so.

IMHO, if I can send a Mother's Day card, with all honest and good intentions and really to show my appreciation for my daughters Mother, then I would think that she could aknowledge that I am also a mother. Not in the same way, but in a way the still affects me.

(I hope that didn't sound harsh)

[taramayrn]

I usually (but I think I honestly forgot last year) send T's mom a card on Mother's Day.

[longingtomeetyou]

i was going to lavish the adoptive mom with an amazing flower arrangement .....she was going to send a picture with a phone call for mothers day......thats what i was "going" to do.....

instead the adoptive dad closed any kind of communication that was going to start.....

so sad.....i just pray for them everyday and pray shes doing ok......

[Hadley2]

Thanksgivingmom, and any other birth mothers out there who went unacknowledged on Mothers Day and feel slighted--I truly believe, especially if all other signs point to the mother being a generally decent, caring person--that, far from disrespecting you, she was probably trying to be sensitive to your feelings and not rub salt into what could be a painful wound. Or, being so new to this two-mother concept or busy with the new life in her care, hasn't had enough time and experience to wrap her brain around it or integrate it into her perspective to really realize that you feel this is your day, too. It may simply not have occurred to her. Or, it could be as simple a thing as that she only sends her own mother a card, maybe her MIL, and that's it. I know personally, I am that way--there are too many holidays and too many people I am "supposed" to remember, so I KISS--e.g., the only people who get anything from me on Valentine's Day are DH and the kids.

[JanetM]

Both happened and I've been very fortunate this is the way its been right from the very beginning. The Aparents sent me a box that included a fuzzy bathrobe and a book, diary style to be filled out, about my history so I can pass this along to my children. The package also included a very nice card.

For the Amom I sent her a basket filled with fruit and gourmet goodies along with a card.

Should it be a two-way street? As browneyes said, and I agree, any successful relationship should be this way. My birthson and my daughter are full siblings and I feel compelled to show them both a healthy relationship among the Aparents and Bparents (us). I hope they'll both grow up happier and more secure as a result. I care deeply about my son's Mom and acknowledging her and fostering our relationship is my own strange way of mothering my son from afar.