[vegcarrol]

My dh and I adopted a beautiful 6 week old girl 5 weeks ago. We were present at her birth but her birthfather changed his mind at 22 hours. Her parents are in a strong marriage and have a one year old son. They called us when they realized they couldn't parent her after all. We have a very open adoption and will be visiting with them in 2 weeks. We will be sending Christmas gifts and birthday gifts from our daughter to the birthparents and sibling as well as plenty of pictures.

I had intended to give the birthmother a necklace with birthstones of both children but had to wait until our little girl was born to choose the stone. We didn't have the necklace when we picked her up. We have it now and plan to take it to our visit.

The problem is that my dh and I can't agree on an appropriate placement gift for the birthfather. We don't want a money clip as economics was a factor in their placement decision. My husband doesn't like the idea of birthstones on a key chain - the stones would probably fall off anyway. We were going to get him a digital camera but he got one before we could.

We want ideas that are different from handprints, cards, video, pottery, etc. We will give these types of gifts at Christmas. We want to give him something that would be suitable at the birth of a child.

Does anyone have any suggestions? Are there any birthfathers on this board?

Thanks!
Carrol

[mckenna]

it is harder to think of things for bfathers. maybe an engraved picture frame?

[Sharon]

My favorite "guy gift" is a nice pocket watch and chain. In the past I've gotten them at pawn shops and vintage stores; the last few years I've noticed they're coming back into style and most major chain stores/ department stores now carry them. I've found good-looking Timex pocket watches for as low as fifteen or twenty dollars (Walmart and Target). I just bought pocket watches for my dad and my son at JCPenney's. The watches are beautiful; they have a good selection. The price range is about 40 to 60 dollars. For an extra ten bucks, you can get a twelve year warrantee. Another good thing about pocket watches is that you can get them engraved for just a few dollars, or in some cases at no additional cost. This personalizes the gift and makes it unique.
Even if the birthfather is not the type of guy who would actually wear a pocket watch, it would be a nice family heirloom that he could keep and hand down to his son someday.
~ Sharon

[May]

I tried to come up with things before scrolling down to see what other people wrote, but now that I did scroll down, I think the pocket watch idea is GREAT!

I was thinking a really nice pen, maybe engraved with his initials or something else.

[vegcarrol]

Thanks for your ideas. My dh and I bought a pocket watch and had our daughter's birthdate engraved on it. Now I have moved on to Christmas gifts and am finding that she is at the wrong age to make a handprint. So, I am starting over and have exactly less than one day to find the perfect gift from my daughter to her birthparents. We have already exchanged tons of pictures. Any suggestions?

[mckenna]

hand prints at such a small age are a little hard, but a foot print is easy and really cute when they are so small. maybe you could put her feet prints on something.

[vegcarrol]

Just wanted to give a belated thanks. We did do the footprints along with a picture in a nice frame. For future use, we found that the salt cookie dough works well on the little ones. It is firmer and a nice hand print can be done with the help of another person. Now I am in search of birth mother and birth father cards. I have found b mother cards. Does anyone make them for birth father's or will I have to find a simple father's day card and rework it?

Thanks!

[maestherd]

As a birthfather, I would have LOVED to have received something like the pocketwatch with my daughter's DOB on it. That is something he will truly tresure over the years.

[michellemartin]

I used the ideas in this thread to get my bf (my babys bdad) a ring with her DOB and name engraved on the inside. HE LOVES IT!!!! The men often get forgotten in the whole idea of placement, so remember them, too. They hurt just as much as the bmoms do, maybe more cause they didnt get to hate how fat they got by that ninth month .

Shellie

[blmsgrandma]

Originally posted by vegcarrol
Just wanted to give a belated thanks. We did do the footprints along with a picture in a nice frame. For future use, we found that the salt cookie dough works well on the little ones. It is firmer and a nice hand print can be done with the help of another person. Now I am in search of birth mother and birth father cards. I have found b mother cards. Does anyone make them for birth father's or will I have to find a simple father's day card and rework it?

Thanks!

There is a clay that you can get at any craft store for about $2 per package that will harden in the oven and comes in several different colors.
(writing this just because I love this idea)
Get a double frame with some depth to it, maybe 5x7 size and about 1/4 inch deep...I think sometimes they are called 'shadow' frames...make sure that the frame is metal! Roll our the clay flat in one side of the frame and put baby foot and hand prints there.
After putting in the oven to harden you can place a photo in the other side.
I have made lots of them and people love them.
They are neat because you can choose pink clay for a girl, blue for a boy, or you can mix colors in tie dye style, or even embellish the clay after putting in prints with clay leaves, clay flowers or whatever your imagination can think of.
They are very durable after hardening.
YOu could also do christmas ornaments.
I know that sounds cheesy, but hear me out, you might like the idea after I tell you what i did with one once.
You can get large frosted ornaments at the craft store too.
I took some feathers, some of the childs hair, (just a little clip that I had from him) ribbon from one of his blankets, and some ribbon roses and made a victorian style ornament and on the center I put his name in gold pen in old english lettering.
The mom really loved it because the boy had died that year and she was having her first christmas without him.
It was very personallized because it had his hair and ribbon from his blanket.

[michellemartin]

I love that idea! I wouldnt ever have thought of that, I see the shadow frames alot at the craft store and never would have thought to do that with them!