[beach4me]

Warning...this is going to be a whine....


Today has been a terrible day. We are in the process of adopting from a South American country. And today we found out that our wait is going to continue being longer than we thought. Paperwork, gall bladder surgery, missed reports, etc..... Everytime we turn around it is one more mistake which further delays us from our son. For nine months we have been waiting for things to flow smoothly but to date, it just isn't happening.

We know God called us to this adoption. We accepted the call and stepped out in faith. But everytime we turn around, it is one more test. Today, I am tired and weary. To top it all all, I have lost my best friend during this adoption. She just could not get past her opinions and "expertise" to realize that God had us on a totally different path then the one she thought was best . So, it has been a lonely adoption journey, no true friend to share it with and a country that very few venture to.

Tonight, I question everything. Where is God? Why does it have to be so difficult? I have peace this is our God-given journey, but I need a break. My endurance level is so low at this point. I need to see God's hand.

Thanks for listening. My prayer is that my faith will continue to grow and I will begin to understand the lesson He is trying to teach me.

[mj77]

I am so sorry for what you are going through . I can understand how you are feeling. Rest assured that though sometimes it might not seem that Christ is there, He is. There is a big picture that you can't see from where you are, but God is working. The enemy is too and wants to break your spirit. God knows right where you are and hears your every plea to him that you've cried. You are being refined and are going to come out stronger. You will need to be for your child. Count it all joy and "trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding" because He loves you and wants good for you.

Many blessings,
Melissa

[dkbw]

Oh dear, I cried reading this, I can totally relate to the feelings your having.

Those days of feeling impending doom, nothing seems right. Why won't things work in your favor and not against you. IT SUCKS!!!

But..... Those days will pass and bring better ones that revive your hope and dreams of having a child. Being parents is what you want. You must hold on to God so tight, even when you think you can't do it anymore. WHen you just want to lay in bed all day with the covers over your head. Pray Pray Pray, even if they are little short prayers God is listening always.

I've found that the more I pray the better I feel. When those doubting thoughts in my mind start I yell (in my mind, not out loud) STOP..... the negative thoughts and I say a little pray, praise God. He will be with you always.

Please know you are not alone we all have shared in these feelings at some point in the adoption process. I will keep you in my prayers.....

[rastachris]

Our son's adoption from Haiti took an agonizing 11 months. We first met him in Haiti when he was 10 days old and we were not able to bring him home until 9 days before his first birthday. This was THE most difficult time of my life - waiting, and waiting, one step forward, two steps back, and and an endless run of bad news. What we were told should really only take 6 months took almost twice as long.

Between the lies and incompetence of our facilitator and the endless delays of the Haitian AND US government offices involved in our adoption, it seemed that no one cared. Instead of being accountable and giving us the truth about the problems with our adoption, we kept getting smoke up our backsides and numerous empty promises. The roller coaster of emotions was almost enough to send me to the loony bin, and a few times almost caused us to want to cancel our adoption of the son we knew was meant for us. I had so many moments when I questioned God and my faith in Him because of how sad and hurt we were and because our son was still in an orphanage in such a poor and dirty country. There were children dying in his orphanage and I was so worried that the next time it might be him.

Our whole adoption was full of heartache, bad people and mistrust - and our facilitator was supposed to be a Christian organization!!!!! The few angels who helped us get our son home finally are responsible for giving me back my faith in people and in Christ. Had they not done what they did, I don't know if we would have ever seen our son come home.

So, please keep your faith strong. At times, even when I was so down and doubtful, my faith was the only thing that kept me sane. I may never know God's purpose for why things went the way they did, but our son is home now and that's all that matters. Once he came home I knew that I would go through everything we endured 10 times over just to have him with us. October 22 will be the first anniversary of his Gotcha! day and I can't believe it's been almost a year. It has just flown by.

I'm so sorry your best friend is not there for you now, but I'm sure you'll find the friendship and support you need right here.

Praying for you and your son,

Tina, momma to Aidan and Makena

[vmitchell]

I just joined this web site and have read several mailings. I just wanted you all to know we have adopted one foster child and she is a blessing. After adopting her we decided not to do foster parenting any more since we just wanted to move on with our little family and since it was time to relicense. We have been foster parents again since last november and we never had a call until march for a boy. we took the 18 month old in and here we are in october and we just had his second birthday. We are feeling stressed as we are not sure where its going and we won't know until dec 1st. I guess I am asking everyone to just pray for our family and the little boy that GOD will make us stronger and make the right decision for the little boy. thankyou

[All Boys]

I am right there with you all this weekend... Feeling down in the dumps and wondering how I will ever make it through all of this waiting.....
We have been looking to adopt since August of last year and then felt that the Lord was leading us to do Foster/Adopt... So we became licensed Foster/Adoptive Parents back in June... And haven't heard a thing from Family Services.. When we were going through the classes they kept telling us that our county was in great need of foster parent for infants through 5 so that is what we became licensed for 2 kids of those ages and have not had not one phone call.... I am truely suprised.... We even agreed to do emergency care. And have not had anything...
So I am not sure what is going on here.. But I do know that God has a plan.. Just not sure what it is. I know that he is the one that lead us to go this direction though. But why I yet do not know.
I am having my own pity party too... LOL!!!!!!
Thanks for listening to my wine too! ! !

I will keep all of you in my prayers tonight...

[vmitchell]

we all sound like winers but atleast we are expressing ourselves instead of holding it all in. I just wish that we would have more cooperation from the case worker that makes us feel like we are the enemy, and then they tell us that they need more foster parents and want us to take more in the home when it takes for ever for them to call for the initial child. we are also on the list to do respite which i am not fond of but to help someone else we are willing to. Any of the kids that we have ever had we always take to dinner and everywhere that we go. the only break we get is when we sleep at night. I just feel I can not have short term placement since i do work a full time job and so does my husband we need to take 0-3 years for a little more permanent but on the other hand they are easier to get attached. i am just blowing of some steam and just rambling on. talk to you all later and i will be praying for all of you and your families.