[Archive]

Originally Posted By Lynn O'K

Our family is currently in the "lame duck" stage of our adoption. Half way between sending the dossier out and waiting for the referral. Our dossier was registared in China mid-Nov 2001. We are a family of 5 - 2 sons and 1 daughter. This is our first time as an adopting family. I am wondering what others are or have done to "survive" the "lame duck" stage. I want to run to the nearest store and buy...buy...buy. However, with so many unanswered questions it is to difficult to buy clothes, etc. So far our family has purchased several books, attend workshops held by the adoption agency we have gone throught, and sit back & wait. I sometimes feel like a pregnant women in the 9th month when everyone says "you haven't gone yet"!! Somehow it feels like something is missing. What are others out there doing to keep the sanity????

[Archive]

Originally Posted By marcia

I am exactly where you are! My dossier was received in China in November '01 also. Now in May, I am finding it very difficult with the WAIT. I want her NOW!! I am a single (divorced) adoptive parent with no children. To pass the time since Christmas, I have re-modeled a room in my house for her arrival. Since I don't know the age, I stayed away from the "baby" type decor and opted for a "little girls' room". But, I have finished the room, waiting for the furniture to be delivered in September, and don't know what to get into next. So I'm turning my sights to summertime activities and trying sooooo hard to stay out of stores. I remember shopping for a friend's twins in March (she has a boy and a girl, age 7 months). Before I knew it, I had 5 dresses for future daughter in the shopping cart! I then, reluctantly, had to hang them all back ! ! ! You are not alone, it is getting harder as the months turn from spring to summer. My agency has support groups for those in "waiting", so I think I'll jump in on some of them. You might want to see if your agency does the same. I have been told by my friends that I am 'pregnant' and will be pregnant for a looooong time. My emotions are all over the place now and I find myself getting very emotional when I take time to stop and think what beautiful gift I will receive. It will truely be an answer to a prayer I've had all my life - to be a mom. And to have someone call me 'mommy' will be the biggest thrill I can ever imagine. Hopefully, China will pick up the pace over the next few months, and I'll get lucky and receive my referral in October - that way I'll have a chance to travel in early December and have my little girl home for Christmas. Wouldn't that be wonderful ! Hang in there, we're in the same boat....! Best wishes and good luck.

[Archive]

Originally Posted By MAS

Hi to both of you!
Our dossier was received in early Oct of 2001.. so not to far ahead of yours!
I just went through a very emotional time last week!
I called our agency just to kind of "vent" my emotions.. They are so great-they send little updates every month and are very helpful.
Luckily this summer my husband and I have alot going on to keep our minds occupied... Lots of weddings to attend and things to plan!
We have done the babys' room very neutral in case we are that 1 or 2% that get referred a boy..
I too am finding it very hard to just not buy!
We were at the mall a few days ago and I saw this adorable little ladybug outfit that I wanted to buy-but have to hold off on!
I have a friend as well who has twins-9 mos old.. I spend alot of time with them-as I am one of theirs' godmother I enjoy that and can't wait to have our baby home too!
I am praying that we will have her/him by Xmas time too!
What a great Xmas that would be!
Hang in there everyone!
Take Care

[Archive]

Originally Posted By Lynn O'K

Hi--Each month continues to feel like forever. With the coming of June came the need to have our home study redone. Flash backs from a year ago. Last year when we were told it would take a long time, I think I was in denial and hoped the waiting time would be much shorter.
I also just talked to our Agency. It sounds like the hopes of things starting to move faster has not appeared yet. I try to keep optomistic--but it is hard. We will have to keep each other posted on what we find out as to where China is with the referral list. till later----

[Archive]

Originally Posted By Wendy

Hi Lynn - Have you joined your month's DTC list (let me know if you don't know where to find it)? This was a MAJOR help for me....we do all sorts of activities (gift exchanges, scrapbook excahnges, quilt square exchanges). I am at the end of the wait and should get my referral next week...my DTC was just after the cut off so my wait will have been just OVER 14 months.... The last month I went crazy not knowing if I was getting a referral or not and then when I did not get one, I was depressed for about a week or so. After that I was fine again...sort of numb and in some ways it still feels like it will not happen. If I travel in Aug (as anticipated with a eraly July referral), it will have been 13 months since I started the whole adoption process....much too long to be 'pregnant'!!

Feel free to e-mail me at wmpott@yahoo.com
I don't check these boards very often anymore....

Wendy
single mommy to Emily (India-3)
DTC April 30,2001 for Melody Faith
DOR...hopfully July 1 or 2!!
Dillon International