[Happy2Bhere]

HI ALL!
We chose China because we were relatively sure we'd get a toddler girl, healthy, and were told the longest in China adoption history for referrals had been 14 months.
Well, now that the referral times are getting further & further out, we are "discussing" other options- maybe in the meantime, maybe instead of adopting from China.
We have a daughter, who will be 4 in October. She asks about her little sister every day, SEVERAL times a day. I wanted to adopt a toddler, so they would be close in age. My husband & I both come from families of 5 children, close in age.
SO, my question is this:
What route can you go to find a toddler in the USA? I mean, we could sign up like we did last time, for an infant with an agency, and hope to get a match. But, alot of families want infants, and we are VERY fine with adopting a toddler. It just seems like international is the way to go if you want a toddler.
I guess if we adopted domestically, even an infant, our daughters would be close in age, but then you have to hope that you get matched with a girl referral.....
It would be so nice to be able to find a toddler to adopt, but foster care is out of the question. I know the first goal is to reunite them with their parents, and my heart would fall for any child placed in our homes, and with our daughter so young- she wouldn't understand- here today, gone tomorrow.
Sorry to be rambling. I know some are drawn to China for various reasons. We just really wanted to be able to adopt a healthy, toddler, who was female. China was a good match. We have several friends who have adopted from China.
Mostly, I just see my daughter was not meant to be an only child, and she CRAVES a sister. We would have 10 children if we were able, but mostly, I crave the close bond for my daughter that I was able to grow up with, and continue on now, as an adult with my siblings.
Thanks for "listening"
Melissa

[lovemybulldog]

Melissa,

I think you'll probably need to do some Googling and asking questions on the domestic adoption boards. I just checked the online album section of our agency's site and there were only 2 girls under 10 in the US listed, and they were part of sibling groups. They list more in their paper album that goes out to seriously interested families, so PM me if you would like contact info to ask questions.

Maybe there's a Yahoo group for domestic toddler adoption? Maybe there are some avenues for toddler adoption in the China SN program? My agency has several boys and a few girls that have very minor special needs...maybe your agency does, too.

[themerrymouse]

You could possibly check into foster adoption. Adopting a child who has been in foster care. A lady I used to work with adopted her son that way. He was almost 3 when they adopted him. Just a thought of something you might check into.

[Dan_C]

What about China SN adoptions? There are alot of kids with pertty minor issues, and plenty of toddlers.

[cindymms]

Our daughter was 26 months when we got her and her sn is very minor. We are PA for our next SN daughter. There are many toddler girls with minor needs who would love the chance to be a forever sister.

[Happy2Bhere]

I check out the waiting children list of special needs children on our agency website all the time. I am very open to a SN child- but on our agency website- there are always only boys.
Do they network with other agencies, or how does that work?
We were looking into Guatemala, got information from an agency, but then someone sent us a link that Guatemala adoptions are not safe right now- might be suspended, illegal adoptions, bad agencies, etc.
Yes, SN would be great! I just need more information- guess I can call our agency tomorrow!
Thanks for the reply!
Melissa

[cindymms]

Since you are LID with an agency you need to talk to them about how you would go about changing over to SN. Every agency does it different.

Most SN lists are close to 50/50 girl to boy at least the several dozen or more lists that I have looked at over the last 2 years. If you are only seeing boys on your agency list I suspect that they are placing the girls before the list is posted. I would think that they would be placing them with families that are already clients. If that is the case you might have priority over new or soon to be clients.

Cindy

[twoinblue]

China does have a few little girls in age range of which you mentioned. Keep looking at those SN lists and you could let your agency know before the list comes out that you are looking. Often if they know you are interested, they release the list to certain people ahead of time.

In the US the children whose parents couldn't get it together are finally available for adoption when they are toddlers. If you look to adopt from foster care (not foster parenting but adoption) you might be pleasantly surprised at the number of children available. Also if you adopted from foser care, the fees would be significantly less or none at all.

[adoptchinablog]

You might consider checking the SN lists on Adele Hall's Chinese Translation BlessedKids site. I think she gets them from one specific agency, but she works with people from all over, and knows the ins and outs of the system pretty well.

[adoptchinablog]

Oh, wait - I can't find the list on her site!

It comes in her email newsletters, though. How strange.

I think you can subscribe to them on her YahooGroup, which is here: Blessedkids_Update : Blessedkids_Update

The most recent message is the one with the list of SN kids.