[Karenanne]

Looks like my husband and I will have to go with plan "B" for our second adoption. I currently take medication for depression and have had surgery in the past year and according to what I have read we would not be accepted because of this. It just seems so unfair. There are all these babies that need homes and now they are turning us away. I just don't get it.

[smbcpc]

Did you talk to your agency (or any adoption agency) about your medical situation? They may be able to give you an idea about your chances of adopting from China. We don't know enough about the new restrictions yet and China may not be so black or white about them. I hope not anyway.
Good luck!

[cdw002096]

We are "out" too according to the guidelines. When God closes one door He opens another. At first I started researching other countries. I took a few days off, had a total melt down and now feel ready to conquer a new adoption plan. So, we are researching domestic adoption.

What is plan "B" for you all?

[amyfk]

Dear Karen anne,

I hope you are well. I wanted to send a big (((HUG))) your way. We have one daughter adopted from Russia and Ive been wavering back and forth about adopting a second, and perhaps, from China.

I take medication for generalized anxiety disorder. There is no way I can get off my medication as I don't feel well without it. When I am on it, I feel just fine like everyone else.

I am now a mom, a wife, a daughter, and a professional. It is sad that China doesn't recognize this. What China doesn't recognize is that there is a wide contiunuum of depression/anxiety disdorders. There are many folks who need medication and then are fine.

Hugs to you. I am sure you are disappointed. Take time to regroup like someone else suggested. There are many children out there here in US and in other countries who need a good person like you to parent them. I am sure you will figure out which way to go.

Best of luck and be kind to yourself,
Amy K, NJ

[lovemybulldog]

If we can't hussle through our dossier, we may also be out. I have a seizure disorder that is completely controlled by a daily medication that leaves me 100% functional and does not alter my ability to function, work, or otherwise live a normal life. Because this could be considered an epilepsy related disorder (it's not, but who knows how it will translate), it could put us out, too. I also had a minor run in with the law when I was 18 that might/might not come up on a background check. Again, this would put us out.

We've decided that since we are going SN/Waiting Child, there are a lot of options for us if China doesn't work out. There are TONS of kids waiting in Thailand and our agency also works with India, Vietnam and Korea. Chances are, we would go Thailand or India, although the process from acceptance to travel is much longer.

What happens for us will happen for a reason. I just know our little boy is out there waiting for us right now and that's what gets me through the day without losing it. Hang in there!

[lnaughto]

Amy,

That was a wonderfully sweet reply :-D I was feeling like 'damaged goods' because of my need for depression-related medication. Tunnel vision can make you feel that you're the only one out there dealing with a given situation. Thanx for reminding me I'm not alone... the fact that we've sought out help for our 'disorders' should be proof of the competency of our collective mental health and parenting potential!

Lee in Upstate New York

[ttcasey]

My heart goes out to everyone who with the new rules may not meet the requirements to adopt from China. I have heard of families moving over to Kazakhstan (which is nestled between Russia and China). Not sure of the requirements, restrictions, timing, but maybe another option. I also have a friend who just adopted from Russia.

[oleson1]

Steph,

I'm not looking at a 2nd adoption (we brought our daughter home in April), but I didn't realize that those on meds for seizure disorders were "out" with the new rules.

I'm on meds for the same thing and when I saw the new rules, I knew they were being super strict, but I didn't see the epilepsy or seizure disorder part.

Wow -

Melissa

[Karenanne]

Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement.

[lovemybulldog]

Originally Posted by oleson1

Steph,

I'm not looking at a 2nd adoption (we brought our daughter home in April), but I didn't realize that those on meds for seizure disorders were "out" with the new rules.

I'm on meds for the same thing and when I saw the new rules, I knew they were being super strict, but I didn't see the epilepsy or seizure disorder part.

Wow -

Melissa

I didn't mean to freak anyone out. I think each is handling the rules (and lack of specifics on some of them) differently.
Our agency rep said that they are don't know 100% yet, but their feeling is that it could be a deal breaker. They don't want to take a chance that the list of specific conditions will grow or become ambiguous and by then it might be too late. They're being really cautious right now with everyone, but did say that they may start requiring a medical form before accepting new China applications.

My doctor was great and wrote a detailed letter that said about 10 times: "she'll make a great mom with absolutely no hinderances caused by this condition or her prescribed medications".

[Ready2bparents]

We can't let China's new policy get us down. Lee, I felt like you when I first met with an agency to talk about Korea. I had just turned 40 and finally accepted the fact that I couldn't have children of my own and was was over the grief of the loss of my natural child. At the end of the meeting I found out I was too old. Talk about feeling like a failure! I couldn't do anything right. I fell right back into my depression. But like CDW002096 said, God does open other doors for us. My prayers are with all of you.

[amyfk]

Dear Lee,

Dont let anyone out there make you feel like you are "damaged goods" because you are on an anti-depressant. I don't know the exact statistics, but I know that there are millions of Americans who are on such medication, they just dont disclose this kind of information to everybody they meet. You are right, the ones who seek counseling and help are the wise ones. There are many folks who could benefit from counseling(even folks who don't suffer from depression or anxiety related issues) but don't want to acknowledge that they have a problem.

Best of luck to you and everybody here.

Amy K, NJ

[esnyder]

Anyone out there check out Guatemala? I am bipolar and have a DUI in my past. We swutched from China before all of this garbage came out. We had a referral one week later, our dossier is almost complete, and we are going to visit our daughter this week in Guatemala. Thaty would never have happened with China. Guess I wasn't good enough for them. Erik

[amyfk]

Erik,

Congratulations and best of luck to you on your upcoming adoption. I'm sure the baby will be the joy of your life.

Amy K, NJ

[tybeemuffin]

I don't know if you are considering Russia, but if you are you will have problems in some regions there as well. Some regions will take past criminal records, but not people on Antidepressants or seeing a therapist.

Good luck find a country that is right for you!