[carolinih]

When providing letters of recommendation to the adoption agency, are family and friends included in this? Physicians? How do you go about getting a criminal clearance letter from the police dept? Sorry all the questions. We are just starting this journey. Thanks.

[skingspan]

Our letters of recommendation were from my wife's brother, a coworker of mine that knew us both and a coworker of my wifes that knew us both. We didn't have to get a criminal clearance, we needed CORI and DSS background checks. I would definately check with you agency on these questions. Some states have different requirements and your agency will know for sure. Good Luck.

[waiting4katie]

Our agency wanted 5 references from our mutual friends and our friends had to send their references directly to the agency. Our family doctor was a peach and quickly filled in our medical forms and also a letter stating his thoughts on our parenting capabilites. And we just walked into our local police dept. (unannounced) and they only needed our driver's licenses then they wrote letters for both of us, while we waited, basically stating we were upstanding citizens with a clean background. We live in a town of 5000 so things have been quick and informal as far as everyone helping in regards to our adoption. Good luck!

[ttcasey]

We needed 3 reference letters from non-family members sent directly to our SW. We needed 1 guardianship letter from a family or friend that would raise our child(ren) in case anything happened to us, this also needed to be sent directly to our SW. We each needed a letter from our employer, and since I carry the benefits I needed my letter to state that our new daughter would be covered under my benefits. We needed a criminal background check, which is easy as going to the police station in your town. We needed DCYF check. Our physician letter was detailed and including a regular checkup we needed HEP,HIV tests, along with a statement from our physician stating that we were able to raise another child.

Good luck, sometimes I think the paperchase was much easier than the wait!

[sak9645]

Each state, each homestudy agency, each placement agency, and each country will have its own requirements.

In general, letters of reference must be from non-relatives. These can include friends, neighbors, work colleagues, religious advisors, your bio child's teachers, etc.

In the case of a single person who is in a long-term relationship, the "significant other" is usually NOT permitted to serve as a reference. If he/she lives with the applicant, he/she will need to have a police clearance, be fingerprinted, etc. like any other member of the household.

There will be a separate requirement for a medical form to be filled out by your doctor. This may include a place where the doctor must comment on your fitness to parent. A doctor's letter does not count as a reference.

If you have seen a mental health professional, or if you are taking any mental health medications such as antidepressants or anti-anxiety drugs, you may be asked to get a letter from the therapist outlining your diagnosis, treatment, and prognosis, and commenting on your fitness to parent. Again, this does not count as a reference.

SOME states and agencies may require a face-to-face reference from a non-relative, as mine did. In my case, I had elderly next door neighbors who were delighted to talk with the social worker.

Sharon

[carolinih]

Thank you all so much for your replies. I have put the word out to friends, family, clergy, and physicians and am having them send the letters directly to the agency. I want to be ahead of the game. I am in a quandry about selecting guardians. It's between two couples really. I really would like to choose my brother but he and his wife are divorcing now so that won't work. One of the couples, my first choice, are older, in their 50s. The other couple is some neighbors who also can not have children of their own and whom I don't really know quite as well. Some of their lifestyle choices are questionable to me as well. I think they are very good people and I think some of their "partying" would slow down or stop if they were parents.

How did you choose guardians? It's really tough. Do you think age is an important factor?

[specialk4b]

I believe that the guardians that you list in your dossier to China must meet China's age requirements as adoptive parents.

We had initially considered my parents, but we purposefully chose Bruces' sister and her husband because they would raise our child the way we would want her raised, and that they would qualify to adopt themselves should they want to.

[Ready2bparents]

Our agency contacted our 3 references (no relatives, not living with us) directly and gave them a list of questions to complete along with adjectives to use to describe our personalities. We selected 3 people that knew us both for some time, not just friends of one or the other.

As far as the police report, we had to go to our local police department and ask that they run a basic check on us to make sure that we were good citizens ( no history of arrests, disturbances, etc) Report had to be on letterhead and notarized by police.

Check with your agency what their requirements are. I was able to give them my reference's emails and everything was done via email within a few days.