[waitingforMM]

Okay, I've been so down about the tiny number of referrals this month and what this means so I've decided to find as many good things as possible about the long wait. Here's what I came up with.

1) We want to move (same area, just a bigger place) and buy a new car but didn't think we could afford both before our referral. Now we have plenty of time to save up for both.

2) We're planning our last pre-baby vacation for the end of May. Now maybe we can take 2 couple vacations before all of our vacations become family vacations.

3) With the extra time to save up maybe we can afford to upgrade to business or first class for the long flights to and from China.

4) With all of the time to save money, maybe we'll have the money for our second adoption saved before we go to China for our first child.

5) DH and I both need to lose weight. Now we have plenty of time to reach our goals.

6) I have a ton of craft projects I want to have done for our daughter and now I have time to finish them all.

Anyone else have anything to put a positive spin on this?

[Trace7]

Saving money is the biggest positive for us. Also - I have been to Asia in summer, and it is HOT - so I would rather travel in cooler months. But if the wait takes a REALLY long time, we may end up going in spring or summer 2007 - LOL. But I do not think it will take that long. We also can get more stuff done around our house with the more time we have to wait.

[specialk4b]

Here are mine:

• I'll be able to finish my 100 Good Wishes quilt
• Enjoy "couple time"
• Save up money for travel/souvenirs
• Plenty of time to prepare nursery
• Complete recovery from knee surgery to allow running after a little one.

I like the positive spin!

[happynifer]

we just had this conversation last night actually.
it's good we can save up more money so we don't have to take out any equity lines or anything. it will also put us in a better position for baby #2 assuming we don't conceive on our own (and after almost 3 years i'm doubting we will without IVF).

[Megi]

I am actually enjoying the wait and anticipation!

While we wait...

-finish remodeling our basement
-golf, golf, golf (signed up for two leagues this summer)
-shop, shop, shop (get essentials and nursery done)
-plan spring, summer and fall getaway (CA, Memphis, and Caribbean)

Megi

[Andi72]

I think this thread came at a perfect time. I have been so down about how long things are taking. I have been trying to make light of it. I think everyone has covered my list already. Save money, get the nursery ready, exercise, take a little trip, etc.

[stephdpenn]

We are going on a family vacation next month. Dh and I wanted to do something special with our boys as a family of 4 before we become a family of 5.

It gives me more time to enjoy spending time with my sons because I know once we have a little girl in our lives our world will be turned upside down till everyone gets adjusted.

Of course save $$.

I am making a point of having "me" time. With my sons being in school I realize this is my last chance for a few years to be able to do things just for me. I am still going to Curves 3 times a week. I am also tanning (getting ready to stand out of the baseball field without burning to a crisp). I even had my hair highlighted the other day, the first time in years.

[Serena1000]

My list is very similiar to the rest already posted. I need a bigger home and a new car so more time to save money, and find a new home is good. Also nice to have more time to save money for when I'm off work.

I'm also writing 2 auditing exams in May so it's nice to have time to study.

Once my exams are over I plan to spend more time reading about adoption -esp about attachment disorder and Chinese culture.

[Teekay74]

I have also been thinking about this- I have to repeat a lot of what has already been said. Save money

1. work on nursery
2. shop
3. spend a lot of quality time w/DD
4. enjoy the anticipation
5. if I happen to become pregnant w/ my 2% chance each year, I don't have to put anything on hold, cuz the baby will already be born
6. Come up w/ a name!!!!!
7. travel
8. Do everything that is easier w/ one child than two
9. get to know my forum friends really well.Happy Waiting!Being positive really does make you feel better!

[sregis]

Originally Posted by waitingforMM

Anyone else have anything to put a positive spin on this?

spin is truly the operative word here-

i've wracked my brain, and cannot come up w/ anything. i have this nasty mechanism that won't allow me to fool myself.

[jetgirl]

Great idea! I was starting to get bummed out...

• Fun vacations with just DH and I
• Get in great shape before it all goes to h*ll
• Paint the nursery and buy all the stuff we need
• Definitely save money, as has been said before
• Brush up on my Chinese
• Buy a bigger car for baby
• Just chill, relax, enjoy "me" time
• Quality time with DH
• Hang out with friends and go to movies while we can!
• Sleep late on weekends!
• Have great fantasies and dreams of how wonderful life with my daughter will be!

Hmm - this actually did cheer me up - thanks!

[Momof2boysinOH]

Well, we really don't have much couple time since we already have 2 little ones. But, I DID think of a few positives to the long wait (there aren't many ):

1. We're working on potty-training our oldest (he's been very stubborn). With the long wait for referral, we'll probably have our younger son potty-trained by the time our daughter comes home.

2. The opportunity to spend lots of quality time with my boys.

3. Not having to buy another high chair for our daughter because our boys will be old enough not to need theirs by the time she comes home.


That's all I can think of...see, not many.

[mylittleladybug]

Originally Posted by sregis

spin is truly the operative word here-

i've wracked my brain, and cannot come up w/ anything. i have this nasty mechanism that won't allow me to fool myself.

Oh sregis, I swear that was me yesterday (and the whole month before actually). I totally understand. Today has been a better day, I think I've turned a corner. Last night's martinis didn't hurt but what really helped was a little soul searching. I won't bore you all with the details, but I posted some stuff on my blog this morning if you want to catch up on my little world.

As for the positive spin, this is what I could come up with:

1. We were kind of dreading traveling in the winter because I hate wearing coats, hats etc and the packing is so much heavier. Now if we travel in the summer it may be hotter that heck but our luggage will be lighter.

I'd much rather be sweating like a pig on the Great Wall than be bracing against a frigid wind. That's just me though :-)

2. more money

It's a start!

~Carolyn

[twoinblue]

I would gladly trade all these to have my girl here but here is my list:

1. My Mom is moving in with us next month and will be staying for a couple of months until her house is ready.

2. Our house is only a year old and we need a lot of landscaping done. We worked all summer on it last year but still have a lot to do. We spent all day today working on things and I'm sure we won't be able to do that when our baby girl comes along.

3. I still need to read all those books on adoption.

[Sean&Shan]

The extra time (which also meant extra money) allowed us to...
- remodel our kitchen
- buy new leather couches
- have the most beautiful baby's room EVER!

Also, climbing the great wall in May vs. Jan. seems nice!

But most of all- we were surprised at how young our daughter was at referral. We were expecting a 12-16 month old and we were refferd a 7 month old. So even though we have waited longer than expected to be joined with her, we are actually able to enjoy more of her life and milestones than we expected0 huge and unexpected perk!