[stephdpenn]

As most of you know from looking at pictures of our nursery, we pretty much have everything done.
Well I had told myself all along as soon as I had seen everything put together and was happy with the way it looked, then I would take all of it back down and put it up. My reason for this is I didn't want all of her stuff to sit out in an open room collecting dust.
This past Saturday I took all of Breanna's crib bedding off and bagged it back up. All of her stuffed animals are tied up in bags to stay clean. I then put everything into her closet and shut the door, then her bedroom door. I know this is crazy but it was such a depressing moment! Her crib is still in there as well as her dresser but the room seems so lifeless now. Dh told me if it makes me that sad then put everything back together. I refused to do it though as I know we are probably looking at 9 months till a referral, still waiting on our LID right now.
What is wrong with me? This shouldn't be that big of a deal. I went ahead and got her room ready so early because it made me feel good, like this is really gonna happen. Now I am just bummed

[Momof2boysinOH]

Stephanie,


I can understand how you feel. My mother thinks I'm nuts complaining about the extended wait time for referral. She says "Don't you have your hands full already?". She thinks the longer I wait, the better. Even though I DO have my hands full, I would love to get my daughter tomorrow!

For you it must be even harder since your boys are no longer babies and you are craving another little one. I hold my boys as much as I can, knowing that soon they won't let me hold them as they become more and more independent.

This wait is hard for all of us. All I can say is let's all be here to support one another during this time.

[stephdpenn]

Thanks Mary.

About my boys, I think that is part of why I am a little down. My baby will be 8 years old on March 23rd. I always get down when I think about how old he is getting. We are having his birthday party this Saturday. I know it is early but right now with DH's job we never know when he is going to be home for sure, so we thought we had better go ahead and have the party. Then my oldest will be a teenager this summer . He is changing so much everyday. I am having a hard time keeping up with his social calendar and who his girlfriend is for the week. I tell myself several times a week that I am too young to have kids this old. Of course when I got on the trampoline and also played basketball with the kids yesterday I start to think I am too OLD for this.
Either way I need a baby!!!

[kathlene]

Hi, Stephanie.

I'm so sorry that you are feeling so down about this. It hurts so much to be so ready for someone and yet have to wait for such a long time.
It's such a difficult process to begin with that my feeling is that anything that makes us feel more positive, more self assured and more sane is a good thing, no matter how long the wait. Perhaps you can just put a few of her things out again just to make it seem a little more real to you.
My heart is with you, Stephanie. Go easy on yourself.

Kat

[jenn2004]

Steph,

I know where your coming from, sometimes it is just so hard to look into her room, of course her room is down the hallway, so to get to our bedroom, bathroom or son's room we walk past her room! I have never closed her door, when I get real bummed I go into her room, look at all her clothes, play with her toys: -) for some reason it really helps me, here lately I am doing it so much more, as we get closer it gets harder and harder

[twoinblue]

I keep my baby room set up and just close the door so it dusn't get dusty. The cats think we bought the recliner for them so I shoo them all out whenever I go in. It stays clean.

[Momof42B]

Hey, I wouldn't be so sad! Soon God will put a beautiful little one in your arms and your heart will long have forgotten these days of waiting.

[SuzanneS]

Our nursery is now our guest room. I went ahead and painted it, and have many of her things in there, but, no crib or other furniture, just accessories. That way, it is still a guest room but I can go in there and look at her things whenever I want to!

Seems to help. I am hoping to be LID in March, but I plan to put the crib, etc in there late this summer, after I am sure I won't have more guests. I am looking forward to it!!!

[venam71]

We put the crib up on April 16, 2005. This was 1 day after we were DTC. Everyday I would go in and look at the crib and the bedding that we chose. It gave me gave me the peace I needed to make it thru the wait. My MIL thought I was nuts. She made her comments and I ignored her.

January 25, 2006 we received our referral. We found out that our baby was born on 4/10/2005 and it comforts me to know that she had a bed at our home almost everyday she was alive.

I think you have to do what you have to do to make it thru the wait. This really helped me.

Just my 2 cents.

[stephdpenn]

Angela, that is a really nice way to think of it-a bed at home for almost everyday she was alive.

I have gotten over my slump. It was just such a change at first to go from a finished nursery down to an empty crib. I have really thrown myself into activities with my sons lately. We have been jumping on the trampoline, playing basketball, riding bikes. Youngest ds has a few basketball games coming up then after that it will be baseball time so I am keeping myself busy. I really do feel for those of you who do not have children at home already to keep you busy. My boys are my lifeline through all of this.