[Megi]

Was curious as to what you prefer(ed) or what works best...for those who are going to have a baby shower...

• Before you travel to China? (how did you time this?)
• After you came home from China?

DH and I are torn...not sure what to do...what do you think?

Thanks...Megi

[stephdpenn]

We plan on doing something not very conventional.

Instead of a baby shower we plan on having a "come and meet me" party. Meaning once Breanna is home and somewhat settled in we will send out invitations along with her adoption announcements, inviting everyone to come and meet her. We have no need for a baby shower because of my recent shopping addiction . I thought by doing this though we could get a lot of the introductions out of the way in a matter of 2-3 hours. Of course if people want to bring her a present that is fine.
We will have a cake and refreshments along with decorations. I just wanted the party to be more of a focus on her instead on me. Plus I really didn't want to play all of the goofy games and wear a hat made out of bows.
I hope this plan works, but of course if she is scared of strangers then this whole party will not happen.

[SofiasMom]

my friends threw me a baby shower after I got my referral but before I traveled to China.

A month after she was home, we had a Red Egg and Ginger party to welcome her into the family.

[Momof2boysinOH]

Megi,


I would think before your trip (but after referral) would be nice. When you have a baby shower for a bio child, you don't know exactly their size either, but there's that excitement and anticipation of meeting your child soon. Maybe you can have a baby shower before your trip and then a "welcome home party" afterwards? Just a thought.

[thundrrds]

Megi;
I'm not sure if this is your first child or not?

Showers after referral are ok because you'll have some info on size (not always accurate but hopefully close!) of your child. But usually the first couple of months home the children gain a good deal of weight from the difference in the diet.
If you follow/ join your DTC yahoo board and other boards you'll have a decent idea of when you're referral will be to figure out a date...

If you're having the party before referral you can do a theme party like books or certain types of toys. Of if there are big ticket items you need maybe several people could pitch in for a car seat or something like that which youll need regardless of the child's size. I'd stay away from lots of clothes until you know her size.

You can also do something a few weeks after you're home. By then you'll have a good idea of what you 'must have' and what types of clothes she likes/ you like her wearing.

If you're daughter does seem to be overwhelmed by strangers maybe time the party around her nap time so she's only up and around folks for a short period of time...

Just some suggestions...

Joanne

[Megi]

Mary - this sounds good to me...before (but after referral)...

We do plan to do something special for her baptism - so maybe we will combine that celebration as a welcome home / meet me luncheon...

Thanks for all the ideas!

Megi

[Beckys Mom]

Hi,
We actually had two showers. One was from my work group and they wanted to give me a shower after I received my referral but before we left for China because I was planning to take 3 months off from work and they didn't want to wait that long. We received our referral in Jan. but didn't get our TA until March so my shower was planned for Feb. It was nice as everyone knew we had a girl and how old she would be when we got her. All the gifts were age appropriate and some of the clothing and a soft rattle even went with us to China.
Another group of friends wanted to plan a shower for after we got home so they could meet our daughter at the same time. We planned that shower for about a month after we got home. My husband was invited to that shower and it turned out to be a lot of fun for all.
If you have time prior to travel then have your shower before you leave however if you decide to have the shower when you get home you might want to give yourself and your baby time to get over your jet lag first. Also most folks recommend not having baby meet lots of new people right away so she has time to get to know you and your husband first.
Best of luck on what ever you decide to do.
Beth
DH Bob
DD Rebekah adopted March 2005 Jiangxi Province

[stephdpenn]

Megi the funny thing about the baby shower thing for me is with my sons no one offered to throw me a shower. This time though I have had many offers. I am pleased that so many people are willing to do that for us but we really just don't need a shower. I have already bought more stuff than she will ever get to use. With my boys though I could have really, really used a baby shower for the basics as well as all the extras.

I forgot to add in my last post....another reason that we are doing the come and meet me party instead of a baby shower is so my dh's guy friends can come also. Where we live a guy would rather be strung up by his toenails before he would go to a baby shower but when I mentioned the meet me party idea every single male said 'yeah that sounds like a good idea, just let me know when it is'.

[Mailbox13]

When we adopted our son from Russia, we had a couple between the first and second trip. We also had one after he got home. The first trip was kind of like a Chinese referral. It gave us info on sizes. The one after allowed the people at my office a chance to meet our DS.

[jenn2004]

I know the girls at work will throw one for me before we leave to go to China but I have asked friends and family to wait till we are home so Katelyn can be a part of it too

[Trace7]

I know for sure that 2 of our showers (one will be a couples shower and one will be with my co-workers, and my DH will probably come to that, too) will be between referral and travel. If there is a third one (these will all be with different groups of people), that may be after we are back. But most likely they will all be between referral and travel.

[prechrswife]

I've asked the people who have offered to give showers to wait until after referral. With my family being several states away, we may end up having one out there after she is home.

[stayjay]

We are also having an "open house" type of gathering when we return. I like this idea since men can come too. We may even break it out into two seperate gatherings, one for family and one for friends/co-workers (so it will be less overwhelming for our daughter-hubby has a big family). If people want to bring gifts, it's fine, if not that's fine too. I am not having a traditional shower, just not my thing!

[roseofchina]

My 2 showers were given after receiving our referral and before traveling. The clothes we received were too big but it didn't take long for Whitley to use them. In fact, in December after we brought her home in September, she had a major growth spurt and some of the clothes she never got to wear! It was nice to have lots of things like wipes, diapers, etc., on hand when we arrived home because we didn't have to worry about running out of anything too soon.

Sharon
dh - husband
dd - Whitley Rose Hui