[Sean&Shan]

In the past there have been several threads asking about hubbies not being as excited or as involved in the adoption/paperwork process. This was def. the case for us. And actually I posted a few weeks ago that my dh was starting to get excited and energetically put together our new stroller without prompting and then spent the evening "walking" our dogs around the house in the stroller (if I only had pictures!). But there was a part of me that wasn't sure if this was a sign of excitement about our daughter or excitement over a new gadget.

Anyway, I came home from work on Valentines day to see my hubby engrossed on the couch reading Karen Evans book, with a pile of other Chinese adoption books in front of him. He had gone to the library and checked them all out and was diving in- which is funny since we own all of the books he checked out!

It was just so neat to see him so curious and enthusiastic and totally independently trying to find out more (versus me doing all the research/reading and telling him what I found out). For the first time I was looking at my daughter's father instead of just my husband and it was the neatest, most romantic feeling- it is bringing tears to my eyes just thinking about it!

So I just wanted to update all of you that are doing most of the work and waiting for your spouse to share in your joy and excitement. We are within days/weeks of our refferal and it just clicked, and it was the best Valentines Day ever!

[An Song Tao]

It is a nice feeling when the worry and uncertainty come off your shoulders.

[kimmie11]

I know the feeling The other day we were shopping for fabric to exchange in the "100 Wishes" quilt swap and I asked my dh's opinion on which fabric to choose. Well I thought I was picky! He spent a lot of time going back and forth, bundle after bundle, when he handed me a bundle and stated matter of fact, "This is it" In his hands was the most adorable bundle of fabric. It felt so good to see him get involved. I gave him such a big hug and kiss. Of course he had that look that said "What did I do" if he only knew!

[miri]

It's really exciting to see that your husband is traveling on the same path with you- instead of the way it often feels, that you're the one in front with him following behind! What a great Valentine present! Miriam LID 5/19 (we're waiting with you for the next batch!!)

[proudmommyof 2]

What an awesome story!!


DH lets me do the paperwork and reading and then just does what I say. He doesn't put up any protests though, when I tell him how to handle something.

I have seen a change in him, though.

I am DYING for a little girl. I love my little boys to death. They are wonderful!! However, I am ready for #3, my daughter. We are not financially ready for it though, and I didn't think dh would emotionally be ready for another ever.

One night not so long ago, we were lying in bed. I've been telling him what I know about Chinese and Korean adoptions (I'm leaning toward China, he likes Korea b/c we don't have to travel and leave the boys). He never wants to hear about it though. This night though, he started asking me all of these questions, and I knew he was hooked.

Now, when I stop to look at little pink dresses, instead of yelling at me, he'll point out ones I've missed and say, "Your daughter will have black hair. She'd look good in this."

I can't wait!!!

[Sean&Shan]

HaHa! Proudmommy, aren't men funny? My sister inlaw gave us a box of clothes from my little blonde neice and dh said, "Of-course we'll have to make sure these work with Lizzie's coloring since she'll have black hair and Grace is a blonde" Who-ever thought my dh would be thinking about coordinating our daughter's outfits with her "coloring"!

[twoinblue]

You know that showtune from the King and I? "He may not always say what you would have him say. But now and then he'll say, something wonderful!" I think it sums up men so well.

Poor hubby had a piece of furniture fall on him the other day and is home for a week because of the hematoma on his leg. He's a little disgruntled about sitting around.

Soooooo I brought out the adoption journal I've been working on for a couple of years and told him that he has yet to write anything in it and now would be a good time.

I noticed him writing in it last night. I can't wait to get it back and see what's in there.

[aristo]

Originally Posted by proudmommyof 2

"Your daughter will have black hair. She'd look good in this."

Its a good start, but notice your DH still used the word "Your daughter".....not "OUR daughter".

Good luck.

[MBA62]

Originally Posted by aristo

Its a good start, but notice your DH still used the word "Your daughter".....not "OUR daughter".

Good luck.

I wouldn't read too much into the language used. I think the key word there is "daughter". Who knows how he said it. My guess it was with a big smile and loving eyes looking at his daughter's mother.

Enjoy this amazing time together. I always found that with the arrival of each of our children, I fell in love with my husband all over again. Take care and keep us posted. I can't wait to read about your referral.

Mary

[morsedonna]

Shannon what an incredible story. Looks like you got the best valentines present ever