[MissyAmomChina]

Hi All,

I just have a quick question. I was wondering how long your child from China was on the bottle. Our daughter has been home for 13 months, is age 26 months, and still loves her bottle. We've been blessed with a good transition and a child who bonded really well with us. She still loves the snuggle, rocking and bottle time with both her mom and dad. Of course, we tend to get some outside comments when people find that she's over 2 and takes a bottle. When asked when we will transition her off the bottle, I tease "Sometime before she goes to college." I chatted with a few moms in our FCC group and it seemed to be a big range with some children never taking a bottle and some taking one to they were 3.5. So I'm curious what everyone's experience has been. Thank you so much.

Take care,

[Cheysu]

My daughter, Abby, took a 'bubba' at naptime and bedtime until she was almost 3, so you're not alone.

After she turned 3, all the bottles were put away and only sippy cups were left. We had a few rough nights, but it wasn't too bad.

My sister gave me a hard time about Abby still taking a bottle at naptime, but I knew that my mother gave my sister's 4 year old a bottle for a 'special' treat one day, so I just laughed.

Chey

[odi]

My Lilly has been home 13 months is 28 months old and shows no sign of giving up her bottle. Since she won't eat we give her a combo of pediasure and formula. We are working with all kinds of speacialists to help with the no eating part but other than suggesting we give her a sippy or cup sometimes they aren't worried about the bottle.
I look at it like this. If this is the comfort she needs then who are we to take that away since she has lost so much in her young life. And when I start to totaly loose it after cleanin another bottle I look at this old article from Le Leche.
I will paraphase.

Natural Weaning

Easy allowing child led will be easier
Management over life, gives child some control in life
Only as long as needed, when need is met it goes away
Trust ,security is crucial
Intimacy
Oral satisfaction
No regrets

As the first letter of each adds up it is all about emotion. Don't let others questions or comments deter you. Thanks for bringing this up and letting me know I am not alone with a two year old on a bottle.
Diana

[foxl]

Okay, everyone will be horrified and I am not quick to admit this ... my Dentist is not concerned and neither am I, and peer pressure may be the eventual end ... BUT ... my kids both still get a mornign and bedtime bottle!

It makes us all happy ...

[Momof2boysinOH]

I think the 12 month recommendation for weaning off the bottle may be a good guideline for some, but for our family it hasn't worked out. At 18 months old my first son was completely off the bottle, but PRESTO he was back on it 2 months later when his baby brother was born. I couldn't blame him...he wanted to feel like a baby again. Now my boys are 12 months old and 32 months old...my youngest is still drinking 32 oz a day and I don't see him being weaned off for a while, even though I feed him solids comprised of 3 meals and 2 snacks a day. My oldest will forget about the bottle most days but sometimes at night when his daddy is traveling he'll want half a bottle for comfort. I don't even mention it to the pediatrician. If it makes my son feel better, I'll gladly give him a bottle!

So, Melissa, if you decide to adopt another child, Lilianna may be off the bottle but could regress back to it with the addition of a sibling.

I wouldn't worry about what other people think...do what's best for your family. I was 3 by the time I gave up my night-time bottle.

[stephdpenn]

Even though I do not have my daughter yet I thought I would chime in here.
My oldest biological son was 12 months old when I took him off the bottle. My youngest was only 10 months old when he started to refuse to take a bottle at all. When I get my daughter though I know it will be so different. I have no plans of taking her off the bottle until she is ready. I feel like these precious babies have missed out on much of the feeding-cuddling time so I will give her all the time that she needs. As long as it is not ruining her teeth that is. People are always going to have a negative comment about one thing or another, that is just how it is. Only the parents know truly what their child needs and what they benefit from. So I would say don't worry and just let her enjoy being a baby.

[SofiasMom]

My pediatrician (who had little experience with international adoption) told me she should be off by 18 months. So I didn't bother to tell her anymore that my daughter was on the bottle. Before my daughter's 3rd birthday, she and I talked about giving it up and on her birthday, had a little ceremony and tossed it.

[Lissa]

Originally Posted by SofiasMom

My pediatrician (who had little experience with international adoption) told me she should be off by 18 months. So I didn't bother to tell her anymore that my daughter was on the bottle. Before my daughter's 3rd birthday, she and I talked about giving it up and on her birthday, had a little ceremony and tossed it.

I love the idea of a ceremony. I think that's great.
Liddy came at 12 months still drinking 6 bottles a day. We have her down to between 2-3 a day right now. If she could she would never eat and just drink all her meals. I do not plan to transition her off quickly. Her pediatrician wants her off by 18 months. While she can take a cup I will keep her on the bottle until she lets me know she is done with it herself. I have recently been told by her that I am no longer allowed to hold her bottle. She does it on her own.

[sak9645]

This reminds me of an Adoption Day story.

When I received Becca, she was 18.5 months old and terribly shut down -- no smiling, no crying, little curiosity, etc.

At our first lunch together, I ordered some cold cows' milk from room service. I poured some of it into a bottle and tried to hand it to her.

And immediately, this terribly shut down child gave me the most enormous SNEER -- the big lip-curling kind. It was as if she was saying, "What the H*** do you think I am? A BABY?"

As soon as I took the bottle and poured the contents into a sippy cup, Becca picked it up and drank thirstily. She was clearly familiar with sippies, and was an efficient user even of the Playtex kind, which requires the child to suck very strongly. I later learned that she was also capable of using a straw.

Becca wanted nothing to do with bottles or pacifiers -- EVER. She had clearly been taught that Big Girls do not use them.

She enjoyed sippy cups even at four, when she could clearly use a regular cup without spilling. It was actually hard to get her to give them up.

Sharon

[prechrswife]

We have friends who have recently returned from China with their second adopted daughter. This daughter would not really take a bottle at all. Like Sharon's daughter, she went straight for the sippy cup and really prefers to drink from her parents' cups. I think with adopted children, just like with all children, these things depend on the individual child.

[hirsh mom]

Our daughter came home at 14 months. She took to bottle fine for a few months, but she wanted to be like big brother and soon switched to a sippy cup. She'll be two next month and has already moved to cups with straws. Just depends on the child, I think.

[MissyAmomChina]

Thank you all for the responses. I guess I wasn't clear that Lily takes a regular or sippy cup with her meals. She has done that from the age 18 months and up. The bottle is more of an emotional comfort. I think she loves the whole routine of bottle, rocking chair, blanket, bear etc.

Take care,

[SummerMommy]

My son took at bedtime bottle (water only) until he was four. It was his security blanket and he really got great comfort from it so I saw zero reason to force him to give it up.


Eventually, he gave it up on his own because he was old enough to be embarrassed that his friends would see it and he also understood that it made it hard to not have a wet pullup in the morning.

My daughter is 18 months old and takes three bottles per day. She gets no comfort from the bottle but it's the only way she'll take formula (sippy cups for everything but formula for some odd reason). She needs the extra nutrition of the formula so we're keeping the bottle for as long as we think she needs the formula.

If it's not hurting their teeth, then I don't see the harm in letting kids have a bottle.

[MBA62]

As others have stated, each child is different. You're best bet is to take your cues from your little ones. My oldest had a bottle until he was 3 yrs old (night time only by then). My second gave it up herself completely by her 2nd birthday. Our little one came to us at 10 mos and it took a bit of coaxing to get her to take the bottle at all. Now at 14 mos. she's doing fine and shows zero interest in the cup. I put one on her tray and she plays with it but won't even bring it to her lips. Her OT thinks that the new sippy cups with the straw (they are little with handles; versus the tall ones for older children) are better. Our daughter is speech delayed and her therapist feels that the straw works the facial muscles more than the sippy with the spout. I mention this as an FYI in case others are experiencing the same delays. In any event, as my Grandmother would say "Don't worry, I never knew a child who went to Kindergarten with a bottle".

[CoatAnnHat]

This will be another unpopular post! First the part i think everyone agrees with...I think YOU are the best judge of when to stop the bottle. Every child is different, some give up the bottle earlier than others. IN MY OWN EXPERIENCE ONLY, my oldest son gave up his bottles at 2. He was born on Christmas and on his 2nd birthday we put all bottles under the tree for Santa to take. He never took another bottle again. He went right to a regular cup. He is going to be 18 this Christmas and back then I dont recall even knowing what a sippy cup was. My younger son is 13, and autistic. He relied on the bottle because physically he had a hard time with a cup and with change in general. He was almost 3 before he could successfully use a cup. At that time we used a tupperware cup with a lid, kinda like a prehistoric sippy cup!

Now to the unpopular part...
I do not think ANY child should be put to bed with a bottle... period. It should never be used to console or pacify a child. I see my nephew walk around all day with his sippy cup and then go to bed with it too. My SIL says he always took a bottle to bed with him, so she gives him the sippy cup now too in bed. To me, this is rediculous.

Habits are very hard to break and I think if a bottle or sippy cup are used for their intended purpose there will be no traumatizing your child when they need to give them up. I also want to say that consistancy is the key to ANY transition. My famous line is "If it was NO yesterday, its still NO today!"...
>>>Ducking the flames<<<<<