[vegaslilqt]

My hubby and I are persuing adoption and we have been presented with a little boy in foster care who is 3yrs old and completely blind. Because all the I's & T's haven't been crossed on our paperwork yet they won't release his complete diagnosis to us just yet. Only to say that he has been completely blind since birth. They've also told us that he has been neglected (young & inexperienced parents) so his speech and coordination is behind, but he is making leaps & bounds in his current foster home!!

Hubby isn't completely on board just yet with accepting this little one. Which depresses me a little because my father was blind due to diabetes so the idea doesn't "freak me out" as much as it does to DH. He's afraid because we currently have a 10yr old, 3yr old and a 19 month old in our home that this poor little one will get "mowed down" by our other kids.

Anyone want to jump in with some encouraging words?? Negative reactions?? How do the siblings react? Do your children attend a school for the blind or are they mainstreamed? How helpful is the school district? Are there any resources that I can look into? Books?

I've spoken with my mom about how taking care of my dad was before he passed away but so much has changed in 30yrs with technology and resources that her advice is kind of limited.

Thanks for your time!!

[momraine]

My children are missing limbs not blind, so I have no experience. I would call your local school, the one your oldest attends and ask them about it. While it is true that they have to train someone to work with this child if they have no one trained, you would have a newly trained person with no experience working with your child. However if there are other blind children in the school district and they have people experienced or better yet a program in place that would be helpful to know. At three the child can get services from the local school district. Because you have a younger child, you will want to learn how this child handles frustration. Often children who have delayed speech get frustrated and some get violent. This would be an issue for your little one, and possibly your three year old if that child is smaller. Also this child will take a lot of attention as he adjusts, can your younger children handle that? Can you? Only you know how your children and your family will handle this. Also remember that things are very different for someone born blind and someone looses thier sight later in life. Some things are easier as they are used to doing things blind, but some things are harder as they have no frame of reference.
I know that in my house a blind child would have issues because my children leave things out, shoes, toys, backpacks, artificial legs, books, etc. All of this would be a danger to a blind child trying to navigate the house. However, I have a friend who has managed to teach her children to keep things put away, a blind child would have no problems in her house.

[denise marie]

We adopted a blind child internatinally.We had these type of fears about him getting hurt with our other children.But has done amazingly well in our home.They were all very gentle with him and he LEARNED very quickly how to motivate around the house.I am sure he would be fine.Their other senses are heightend due to noe sight and belive me they use them WELL.

[momraine]

For our son who is missing three limbs completely we worried about his physical issues, but they were nothing compared to his other issues. He has been diagnosed with RAD and some other issues that were much more difficult to deal with than the pysical. So make sure you are looking at that as well.

[JCNickmom]

We are adopting a little girl who is totally blind. Being visually impaired myself, I'm not as fearful about the whole situation as I might have otherwise been. However, there will be challenges, and being as prepared as possible will help (I hope). I'm very much in agreement that the physical is a breeze compared to the emotiona and attachment issues that can occur. As far as the other kids go, having a blind sibling will just become their normal. Don't overprotect him. Don't make his siblings responsible (beyond their years) for his safety. Accidents will happen, and it's OK. Let him be a normal kid. Also, don't do everything for him. Make him responsible for chores and cleaning up after himself just like the rest of the kids. You'll be doing him a HUGE favor. Challenge him and encourage him to do the very best he can at everything he does. Don't allow fear to be your main motivator in making decisions for him. You will find that a child who is born blind will handle life much differently than a sighted adult who lost their sight later in life. I hope everything works out for you.
Melissa