[momraine]

What do you tell people, teachers, coaches, babysitters, etc. Do you tell them all of our child's diagnosis? Do you tell them ahead of time about your child's disability? Do you tell them the child is adopted?

[Lylac]

Yes to everything. Because they see the braces or splints, and always ask what happened. Once I tell them that they have SBS, I then have to explain that I adoipted them. If not I get really mean acusing looks. I get the looks from normal people.

But not any professional, to which I have to tell them everything anyways, to get my kids services.

[Barksum]

Yes..and no. I tell medical professionals everything and they pick and choose what they think is relevant to the current issue.

I homeschool my children, so don't deal with teachers, but when we were working with Early Intervention I explained all the stuff so that we could be sure to screen for and consider ANYTHING that we thought might have been impacted by their early history. (So basically we looked at everything! ) I don't think I would discuss everything with the child's teacher, but only that the child was adopted (since this relates to many classroom discussions, but I would ask that they respect the child's right to privacy), and only those issues that may be of concern medically or to the general daily classroom issues. ie: concrete thinking, safety awareness, etc. Many of those issues are significant enough to warrant IEP's or other interventions, so the teacher is likely aware of those anyway.

I tell babysitters/caregivers only what they need to know to address the current situation. So I may not tell them ALL the dx, but just that my child(ren) have/has developmental delays, or that they need concrete directions without euphemisms (which I then have to explain...), or that this child doesn't have a concept of safety issues, etc. Additionally, I only leave my kids with people who know our family and know my kids. I've never hired an 'outside' sitter.

I was discussing my one son's speech delay with a friend at a bridal shower. I shared how excited we were that he was talking and talking so clearly, and the lady next to us was really puzzled because my Ds is now 6 and most kids speak pretty well by age 6. So I said, 'Oh! Well, he was born addicted to heroin so he has delays in several areas.' She paused and said, 'How did that happen?' and looked at me inquiringly. I could see the thoughts flitting thru; how did I kick the habit, DID I kick the habit, how could I have and parent 5 kids while being a heroin addict, how could I be so plump and be an addict...??? I laughed and explained that he was adopted. You should have seen the comprehension flood her face! LOL

[ajjhmf]

Our doctors know everything.

Our school knows some things that are relevant to his education. His principal knows the full story because she was there when everything went down with his borther. His MFE mentions his adoption, but his IEP does not.

I don't tell coaches. Unless it will affect his performance, the I don't think it's relevant as J's issues are not physical, but mental/emotional.

Some peopel at church know, but only those we are close friends with.

I don't share much any more unless I know people or I feel it's necessary.

[momraine]

With M, it's obvious, and since we are in a small town and he was already 6 when he came home and he still has an accent people know. But with P, some people don't notice, if she wears the right clothes you can't tell her legs are fake. Now most teachers know her, but sometimes forget to tell subs and it scares them because she takes her legs off in school a lot, when she gets tired she tends to kick them off under her desk. LOL. We don't usually tell about the adoption, but she often tells her teachers and her close friends. She is proud of her russian heritage.